Y’all, in answer to the question, “What gun would Jesus carry,” we have an answer.

A Catholic priest in Ann Arbor is taking heat for a pro-gun letter that encouraged parishioners to arm themselves, and said Christians too often pretend they live in a bucolic “Mayberry”-like world where bad things never happen.

The lengthy, 4,150-word missive is a followup to controversial announcement the Rev. Edward Fride made during Palm Sunday Mass when he said the Christ the King parish was offering concealed pistol licensing classes in response to an uptick in crime in the area, the Detroit Free Press reports.

I guess it’s official.  Jesus would have shot people who were messing with him.

The priest acknowledged his personal spiritual journey from being a pacifist to being The Terminator by writing a letter.

The priest clarified his position in the letter, which he titled “ We’re Not in Mayberry Anymore, Toto!”

You cannot mix metaphors.  That’s the law.  You can get shot for that on at least 27 college English departments.

Thanks to Mike for the heads up.

Anywhere else in Texas, you get indicted for a crime and tried for a crime in the county where the crime occurred.

Not so in Texas where Republicans in the Lege just voted themselves some real special  rules.  A new designation for elected representatives just passed the Texas House.

The vote for House Bill 1690 follows similar action in the Senate, which has signed off on giving lawmakers and other top-level state officials even more leeway in determining where they would face prosecution for abusing their positions.

If they go on a law-breaking frenzy in Austin, they want to be indicted and tried by their own District Attorney in their own county.  You know, their golfing buddy.  They are the only Texans who get this special treatment.  Life is very special for the special people.

It is likely that this came about due to the newly elected Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, who is a double-geared lightning sleezeball.  This guy is low enough to steal an expensive writing implement at the body scanning machine and get fined for criminal securities fraud.

His buddy and business partner is the District Attorney in Paxton’s home county, Collin (think Fort Worth).  Right after Ken got fined for securities fraud, Ken conducted “an investigation” of himself.  Shockingly, after a completely detailed and exhaustive investigation, Ken found that Ken was not guilty of any wrongdoing.  Texans slept better that night.

The district attorney in my county has never ever investigated anybody accused of Republican political mischief, even though we gave him living proof of one of them voting in two states.

The Republicans in the Texas Lege just handed themselves a Get Out Of Jail Free card.

Thanks to AlaninAustin for the heads up.

Sometimes it’s a simple story.

A man accidentally shot himself in the testicles while walking down a street in Los Angeles Saturday, police said.

The good news is that he’s now very unlikely to add to the gene pool.

The bad news is that I bet it hurt like hell.

Thanks to Larry for the heads up.

Here’s Larry’s Upright’s Obituary.  He was 81 years old when he died.   He died near Charlotte, North Carolina, in a town called Kannapolis.

Yes, as a matter of fact, this is real.

On the upside, my Momma is 89 years old and has every intention of living until she’s 91 so she can vote for Hillary.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

Rick Perry Bless His Heart.

Y’all, Rick is talking again and it is not a pretty picture.

In explaining how he is different this time, Rick admits that he and “his team” lied.

Perry also acknowledged that he had serious health challenges during the last campaign, even though his team denied them at the time.

And that he was dumber than a sack of hammers.

“To be prepared, to stand on the stage and talk about this myriad of issues, whether it’s domestic policy, monetary policy or foreign policy, it takes years of intense studies,” the 65-year-old replied. “I spent the last three years in that mode — being able to stand up and discuss all of these issues and do it in a way that is very profound and impactful.”

Yes, he spent three years taking a course called, “Impactful Gettin’ Smart.”  I think he means that he spent three years doing what everybody else did with the rest of their lives.

Rick Perry being profound is something I will pay money to see.

Thanks to Charles for the heads up.

This right here was on Facebook.  Click the little one to get the big one.

Okay, so here’s the deal.  These coins were commissioned in 2005 when that Christian-Hating Obama wasn’t president.

The $1 coins were commissioned to be a series about the Presidents of the United States.  It was decided that these would be the first coins since 1905 minted with writing on the edges.  These say In God We Trust and E PLURIBUS UNUM and the date they were minted on the edge.

It looks like these over to the right.

Now here’s the fun fact.  A limited number of the George Washington coins got through the mint without the inscription around the edge.  If in fact the Facebook guy had one of those, it’s no wonder the post office worker wanted it back.  They are worth $640 to collectors.

People who think it’s appropriate to put God on money are obviously not getting any messages from God.