Archive for March, 2015

Oh Lord, He Thinks He’s the Love Child of Marlon Brando and John F. Kennedy

March 08, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Ted Cruz wrote a book.

politifact-photos-cruzcover0315

 

Okay, first of all, the title is kinda weird for a guy who has one of the worst scores on Politifacts’ Truth-O-Meter.  But then again, Tom DeLay named his book “No Retreat, No Surrender” when retreating and surrendering was all he did.  You gotta watch Republicans about stuff like that.  They signal what they aren’t.

Second of all, who’s idea was it to put Ted Cruz in a leather jacket like some hunka hunka burning love?  For pete’s sake, the poor guy’s ears aren’t level and his “slight grin” looks like he’s fixing to spear a possum or some damn thing.

Lastly of all, he couldn’t come up with his own idea so he’s rewriting John Kennedy’s “Profiles in Courage” from the standpoint that greed is good?  Where is Lloyd Bentsen now that we really need him?  “Sir, I knew John Kennedy.  John Kennedy was a friend of mine.  You are no John Kennedy.”

The book is out in June.  Whoopy!

Lindsey Graham and the Internet Machine

March 08, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Lindsey Graham has started swooning over Hillary Clinton’s email account.  Bless his heart, he was just all a’quiver about Hillary’s audacious use of that devil’s spawn – email.

lindsey_graham_1Lindsey does not use the email.  Ever.  Never. Without end.  Amen.

He took himself to Meet the Press and announced —

“I don’t email,” Sen. Lindsey Graham (S.C.) said. “You can have every email I’ve ever sent. I’ve never sent one.”

Hell, even my 89 year old mother uses email.  She was reluctant to use the internet for a year or two because she had heard there was pornography on the internet.  We told her, “just don’t look at it.”  That seemed reasonable to her, so she got an email address.   So maybe that’s Lindsey’s problem – he just can’t bring himself to not look at it.

Here is man who wants to be President of the United States of America in 2016 and he can’t use email. Oh Republicans, y’all are so cute!

And He Can Almost Pronounce It

March 07, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Louie Gohmert has learned a new word.  He’s stopped calling any who who disagrees with him Hitler.  They are now Ayatollahs.

Gohmert told the Family Research Council’s Tony Perkins that while he attends Obama’s speeches out of “respect for the office” even though he rarely agrees with what the president is saying, Obama and other administration officials “disrespected Israel and disrespected the leader of Israel, it was not about the man.” “If you named a caucus by who it helped, you’d have to name this one the Ayatollah Caucus.”

Remember the State of the Union speech where Congressfool Joe Wilson hollered, “You lie!”  Well, at that same speech, Louie Gohmert wore a handmade sign around his neck saying, “What bill?”

Oh yah, they were on a tear that night.

t1home.obama.speech.09.poolSo, I guess I’m asking who gets to define “disrespect?”

Louie Damn Gohmert?

Oh no.

.

.

.

.

Thank Yew, Alaska

March 07, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

I am extremely grateful for Alaska’s Congressman Don Young.  Wanna know why?  He makes Texas congressmen look relatively sane.

Young wanted gray wolves taken off the endangered species list because he wants to kill a few, I thought.  I was wrong.  Arguing his case, Young spoke to the House Natural Resources Committee.

“We’ve got 79 congressmen sending you a letter, they haven’t got a damn wolf in their whole district,” Young added. “I’d like to introduce them in your district. If I introduced them in your district, you wouldn’t have a homeless problem anymore.”

Well, that’s one way to look at it, I suppose.  Not a sane way, but certainly a way.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Bundles of Cold Hard War Machine Cash

March 07, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Jeb Bush, who is waaaaay different than his brother and father and you know that because he says so, adds another Bush relic to his team.

lawyer-andrew-w-stinson-photo-999100Oil and gas attorney Gaylord Hughey Jr., the top GOP bundler of East Texas, said in a Thursday interview with The Texas Tribune that he will round up Piney Woods money for Bush.

I dunno how Bush will do in the Land of Louie Gohmert, but Gaylord sees Babyest Bush as — “I think he’s pragmatic. I think he’s thought a lot about his positions.”

Hughey said he is a big fan of former President George W. Bush, but he did not know his brother well until recently. Jeb Bush and Hughey met in Dallas about a month ago.

Well, that ought to tell you all you need to know.  The guy who loves W also loves Jeb.

Thanks to David for the heads up.

And The Rick’s Just Keep On A’Comin

March 05, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Rick Perry, the first and the loudest to criticize Hillary Clinton’s private email account, also used …. yep, a private email account.

It was discovered during a House Transparency Committee investigation of the turmoil at the University of Texas Board of Regents.

Joe Larsen, a First Amendment attorney, called it hypocritical for Perry to criticize Clinton for apparently skirting email disclosure when he was frequently criticized for doing the same as governor. Perry’s office took heat over the years for deleting emails every seven days, a period Gov. Greg Abbott extended to 30 days immediately when he took office in January.

Hey, his defense is that Hypocritical is his middle name.

Thanks to Kyle and Barb for the heads up.