Y’all, I did not realize that the Thad Cochran / Chris McDaniel race was a fight to the death match.

That sucker is still going on!

After one of the nastiest races in American history including breaking into a nursing home, calling Cochran’s daughter illegitimate, a suicide over shenanigans, and claiming that black people swung this election and God knows black people have caused enough trouble already, now Cochran is offering snitch money.

Mississippi State Sen. Chris McDaniel’s (R) campaign announced Thursday that they are offering 15 rewards of $1,000 each for people who can bring evidence that leads to the arrest and conviction of people involved in voter fraud in the Mississippi Republican runoff for U.S. Senate between McDaniel and Sen. Thad Cochran (R-MS), who won the runoff.

McDaniel’s Senate campaign announced the reward in an email as part of his newly launched “Election Integrity Challenge and Voter Fraud Reward.”

Well, that’s catchy – the EICAEF Reward.

Y’all, who thinks up these things?

That’s how the tea partiers win, they just finally wear you down by being bullies.

Look, McDaniel, you got out-cheated.  Take it like a man.  Shuddup.

Thanks to many for the heads up.

Now here’s a petition we can all get behind.

Yep, click right here and feel good about yourself.

Thank yew.

For the thousandth time, Rick Perry is not gay.  Not gay.  Not at all.  Not even kinda.  No gayo.

So it was just shocking, shocking I tell you, when Texas Land Commissioner and very sore loser Jerry Patterson indicated that there might be something amiss in Perry’s “sexual” department.

Jerry: a manly man

In an article about boots in the Austin American Statesman, Patterson mused …

Jerry Patterson: retired Marine, beloved state official, haberdashery expert.

He also noted boots are good for carrying knives, small guns, “unmentionables” or “a small flask, giving rise to BYIB (bring yours in boot).”

Well, apparently you can also carry a sharp stick in your boots.  Our governor, Duh Perry, says he quit wearing boots because of his bad back.

“Tell Rick that boots can be purchased with normal heels,” he wrote. “I lament the fact that our governor could now pass for a West Coast metrosexual and has embarrassed us all with his sartorial change of direction.”

Yikes!  Metrosexual.  That’s just three alphabet letters away from … you know, what Perry is NOT.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

This picture was taken by a friend in Colorado.  Click the little one to get the big one.

Hey, everything is spelled correctly.

And, no, I do not know what they have against wolves.  Or if wolves can read.  Or if they follow directions.  That’s not my area of expertise.

However, I kinda do know why “the white race” is symbolized by snowmen with big ears, empty eyes, and penis noses.  No, wait, come to think of it, it doesn’t look a damn thing like me.

Thanks to Vickie for the heads up.

There’s a story that claims the first two and only cars in Chicago had a wreck.  I doubt it’s true, but it makes a good story.

Speaking of wrecks, here’s Georgia.

A “misunderstanding” between two armed men in a Georgia convenience store led to an arrest on the very day that the state’s new expansive gun rights law went into effect, according to The Valdosta Daily Times.

Valdosta Police Chief Brian Childress summed the incident up for the newspaper.

“Essentially, it involved one customer with a gun on his hip when a second customer entered with a gun on his hip,” Childress said.

According to the Daily Times, the first man, Ronald Williams, approached the second man in the store and demanded to see his identification and firearms license. Williams also pulled his gun from his holster, without pointing it at the second man. The second man responded by saying that he was not obligated to show any permits or identification — then he paid for his purchase, left the store, and called the police.

That’s not a misunderstanding.  That’s a showdown.

The first damn day, y’all.  They couldn’t even wait for the ink to dry on the Governor’s signature.

Thanks to Sandy for the heads up.

THIS: the Texas Democratic Party platform is online.  It’s long, it’s progressive, and it’s dandy.  I’m pretty proud of how it turned out.  A special thanks to Representative Garnet Coleman for his untiring work on the platform.  He never once threw anything at me although it would have been justifiable tossing.  His knowledge of issues facing Texans, especially healthcare, and his prowess with the English language are a gift to Texas.  Plus, he’s just damn cute.

THAT:  NBC News lists “The Ten Most Overlooked Races in 2014.”  I agree with this one for sure.

10. Texas Lieutenant Governor: Last but certainly not least, don’t ignore November’s LG race in the Lone Star State. For one thing, the contest between Republican Dan Patrick and Democrat Leticia Van de Putte is likely going to be closer than the gubernatorial matchup between Greg Abbott (R) and Wendy Davis (D). And second, if Patrick wins, he could very well be one of the most-talked-about political names in 2015. He’s a polarizing figure, and could make Abbott’s early tenure as governor an interesting ride. Remember, constitutionally, Texas’ lieutenant governor is a pretty powerful figure.

Leticia stole the show at the Texas Democratic Party’s convention.  She is riding a tsunami of sanity and solicitude against Dan Patrick’s seedy self-interest.

We desperately need to win this one.  She can do it.

And you might enjoy Trey Martinez Fischer’s speech at the convention.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5DnTpNv8B5w#t=53

That’s funny.