Rick Perry was down in the Rio Grande Valley yesterday touting his sell-out to really bad doctors and really greedy insurance companies.  He calls it tort reform, but what is really is should be called “If a drunk doctor amputates the wrong foot, you’re just totally screwed.  Hell, we’ll probably make you pay him money and double your insurance rates because now you still have that other foot that needs amputating.”

Ten years ago, we were promised lower insurance rates and better medical care with hot and cold running doctors if we just passes tort reform.  So we did.

Ten years later and what do we have?  Texas REALLY sucks at health care.

A new federal government report card on health care quality rates Texas as “weak” overall and gives it the lowest score in the nation.

The lowest score in the nation.  Ho boy, but we have some happy doctors and insurance companies with no incentive to provide good health care.

Brian Nieves is a Missouri State Senator.  He’s a 2nd Amendment fanatic and a Tea Party devotee.

He needs money to run for re-election and comes up with an idea.  A skeet-shooting party.

That on its own isn’t the worst idea in the world, but it’s what else the voices in his head tell him to do that jump ship.

Brian decided to raffle off a new Sig Sauer 516 Patrol AR-15, which ain’t exactly used to shoot skeet.

But, let’s not stop there.  Let’s see what levels of sponsorship Brian has.  According to his Facebook page for the event, there’s an eyecatcher.

In sponsorship categories, there’s Sharpshooter, Marksman, and for the most expensive level of sponsorship  — Sniper.

Click the little one to get the big one.

In the general sense of the term, I guess a sniper is a hunter, but probably not of deer or ducks.

Now just so you know, Brian is not some Republican crazy outcast or anything.  He is the Senate Majority Whip.

Holy crap.

Thanks to Chloe for the heads up.

There’s a California company who has taken to building survival shelters.

A Southern California company is building luxury survivalist bunkers complete with wide-screen TVs, plumbing, and bunk-beds. They start at about $65 thousand dollars and that doesn’t include the cost of digging a big enough hole.

The above mentioned survivalist bunker must be placed 20 feet underground, and California, where they are made, won’t let  people put them that far underground there.  So the guy who builds them says he’s coming to Texas, where we are good at digging holes.

Hey, the big enough holes all over Texas problem is solved because we got a guy digging himself holes all over Texas – Greg Abbott, the guy who wants to be Governor in order to dumb-down the lofty intellectual perch that Rick Perry built.

Here ya go.  Here’s a new one.  Do you wanna know why we need voter ID in Texas according to Abbott?  Obamacare.

Yep, Obamacare.

Here’s his reasoning: Since 2004 when he took office, he has prosecuted only 4 cases of voter fraud that voter ID would have stopped.  Abbott’s office has looked at 66 people on charges of voter fraud. Half of those cases involved mail-in ballots, which voter ID won’t bother.  But, he’s only prosecuted 4 of them.

So why do we need to disenfranchise probably 200,000 voters in order to stop 4 illegal votes over 8 years?

Obamacare.

Somebody keep handing Greg Abbott a shovel because he’s going deeper.

His theory is that in 2008 Al Franken in Minnesota stole the election from Norm Coleman by 225 votes.  He, of course, can’t prove that, but his lips can form the words so he can say it.

Okay, we’re getting to Obamacare so hold on and stand back.

Had Al Franken not stolen the election, we would not have …. ta da! …. Obamacare.

There ya go.  We need voter ID so as not to have Obamacare.

And at Abbott’s prosecution rate, it will only take 56 years to repeal Obamacare.

So, bring on the survivalist bunker because Greg Abbott will stand in your front yard and try to dig himself to China.

Thanks to TexasTrailerParkTrash for the heads up.

George Zimmerman is missing all the attention.

She said her husband of five years was in an argument with her and her father and had his hand on his gun, Lake Mary Police Chief Steve Bracknell told NBC News.

Shellie Zimmerman told ABC News last week her husband was “selfish” and has been making “reckless decisions.”

“In my opinion, he feels more invincible” since his acquittal, she said.

ABC News is reporting that punched his father-in-law in the nose and threatened to shoot him and his wife, “according to 911 tapes of a domestic incident today.”

So the victim got to the phone this time.

So Louie Gohmert, Michele Bachmann and Steve King walk into a bar …

Or Egypt.  Could be Egypt.

Gohmert reported —

“We met with for a long meeting General el-Sissi and many of the military leaders, and my friend Steve King mentioned again about our heritage in America,” Gohmert explained. “George Washington, doing what no one had ever done before him, led a military in revolution, won the revolution, and then resigned and went home.”

Al-Sisi or George Washington? Hard to tell.

What?  Say hey?  When did that happen?  Yeah, Yeah, el-Sissi is just exactly like George Washington, er … well, except for the 8,000 of his own people that he’s killed since Morsi’s ouster.  Hey, but that’s minor.  And he does, in fact have a very cool hat like George Washington did.

Please, somebody tell Louie that they’ve already heard the Walk Like a Egyptian joke so quit dancing like a damfool.

Now I am wonder where Michele Bachmann gets off telling al-Sisi —

“We were cheering in front of our televisions back home in the United States,” Bachmann said, referring to when the Egyptian military overthrew Morsi. “We were cheering for you.”

Where did she get this “we” stuff?  I wasn’t cheering.  I was horrified, confused, and deeply disturbed by it.

Why do I get the feeling that these three clowns cannot wait to see this happen in the United States?

Is it just me or is there some weird form of treason going on here?

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

No matter how you feel about Syria, the one thing we all know is that it could be worse … George W Bush could still be President.

Uh, wait.  I misspoke with that “all” thing.

Republican Senator Jeff Sessions of Alabama believes the country wouldn’t be facing the decision of whether to attack Syria if George W. Bush was still in the White House.

At a town hall meeting on Friday, he claimed that Syrian President Bashar al-Assad would be too afraid to use chemical weapons if Bush were president.

There might be some truth to that.  If someone mentions George W Bush, I’m afraid to even breathe.

Sessions says Assad would have known that Bush would come after him.  Yeah, Baby!  Just like Bush went after Osama bin Laden.

Thanks to Stephanie for the heads up.