This afternoon, a man walked into the Houston airport and fired some shots into the air with an AR15.

For those of you who think having an armed guard makes you safer, an air marshall fired at the guy. And missed.

The guy then pulled out a handgun and shot himself in the head.

Thank God that no one else was hurt.

As you know, Governor Goofy has been traveling all over the USofA trying to steal jobs from other states.  These trips have been no small expense for the people of Texas because we have to pay for his gallivanting to foreign states.

But, it looks like it was almost worth it.  If, of course, you define worth it as being adding tons of guns to a town that already brews tons of beer.

When Texas Gov. Rick Perry reached out to draw [California] gun shop and training center Shield Tactical to Shiner, company president John W. Harrington had a rapid-fire response – yes.

For now, the company is operating with six employees, Harrington said, but the goal is to have 15 employees..

Shiner is home to Spoetzl Brewery, the birthplace of Shiner Beer, where the new motto will be “Guns and Beer:  Less Accuracy, More Fun.”

Now, I’m not saying that mixing beer and guns is exactly a bad idea.  But, I just hope that when Jesus comes back he doesn’t land in Shiner, Texas.

And as far as those six whole jobs, well hell, watch out Richie Rich because Texas is on the way!  We can probably cut taxes by $1,500 a person on that alone, right Governor?

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Thanks to Laura for the heads up.

Please meet 72 year old Kenneth Henry of Proctor, Texas.

Kenneth Henry is one of those guys who makes the devil gleeful.  He owns Henry’s Turkey Service, a business operating in Iowa and other states.

Henry is a slave owner.

He testified that over the decades, Henry’s sent 1,500 mentally disabled men to labor camps in seven states, including Iowa camps in Spirit Lake, Ellsworth and Atalissa.

These men we paid 41 cents an hour and housed in deplorable conditions in a rat infested converted bunkhouse where some were tortured and at least one froze to death.

Henry, of course, is a Christian man.

The government has imposed almost $5 million in fines over the years but none of them were paid.

The living conditions to the least, the last, and the lost were the things of nightmares, more commonly called “Ted Cruz’s and Rand Paul’s Vision for America”.  A free market away from the nanny state and government interference.

Where God’s children are tortured to make a man rich.

There is a small measure of justice.

A jury on Wednesday awarded a total of $240 million to 32 mentally disabled turkey processing plant workers in Iowa for what an expert witness described as years of “virtual enslavement” by the Texas company that oversaw their care, work and lodging.

I say small because about half of the men died before the case got to trial.

But there’s more —

He also testified that it now appears the company might not have filed corporate tax returns in 2008, 2009 and 2010.

Ayn Rand would be so damn proud that her tail feather would be flying.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Chief U.S. District Judge Fred Biery, a Clinton appointee, is famous in Texas for writing the best damn opinions in Texas.  They are smart and entertaining.

He’s done it again.

The legal issue was the clubs’ request for a preliminary injunction that would block enforcement of a city ordinance. That ordinance requires that exotic dancers in certain establishments wear bikini tops instead of pasties.

In what he called The Case of the Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Bikini Top v. the (More) Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Pastie, Chief U.S. District Judge Fred Biery denied the clubs’ request. In doing so, he certainly had some fun writing his opinion.

And please don’t forget to read the footnotes.  They may be the best part of this amazing legal document.

Fred Biery has caught our attention before now.  There’s here.  And here.

He makes me so proud to be a Texan.  And even a little proud f having married a lawyer and given birth to one.

Okay, I have to admit that I read this headline on a story that Carl sent me totally wrong.

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I mean, shooting the finger is rarely accidental.  It could happen, I guess, and that would surely make headlines but that wasn’t the case here.

It’s out of Minnesota where 66 year old Fred Peterson was showing his wife a new .38 special handgun.

Ole Fred, a firearms instructor, holstered the weapon, whereupon his wife asked if he could pull the trigger while the gun was holstered.  Fred tried while he held the holstered gun in his left hand.  Shot his damn finger, he did.

He explained, “The gun was pointed in a safe direction, but my finger was not in a good spot.”

It rarely is, Fred. It rarely is.

Petersen is an NRA-certified instructor for classes required to qualify for a Minnesota concealed-carry handgun permit, apparently a job that requires a double digit IQ.  Kinda makes you wonder how Fred lived this long.

Thanks to Carl for the heads up.

Even before my first sip of coffee, I glanced at Huffington Post and saw this.  I quickly closed the window on my computer.  I am not going back.  I am not.

If you have the nerve and are wearing biochemical gear, click on the little one to see it full size.

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Hey, don’t holler at me that scared you.  I warned you.

While every single quote was anonymous because people generally don’t like to be seen as totally goofy with a cherry on top, my favorite part is where it says …

His supporters argue that he’d be a Barry Goldwater type — a nominee who would rattle the Republican establishment and reconnect the party with its base – but with better electoral results.

Wait a minute!  Hold on!  That makes as much sense as a screendoor on a submarine.  That’s why Goldwater lost – he reconnected the party with its 34% base and was thereby seen as a kook.  And hell, Barry Goldwater was a likeable guy and had a few friends in his own party.  Cruz is neither.