I would not give you a plug nickle for this candidate but I bow to the perfect yard sign – even if it is placed illegally.

I probably wouldn’t vote for him for DA in Harris County – I’d just skip that race – but I’d hire him as my yardsign designer quicker than a jackrabbit with a diesel motor.

Thanks to AH for the heads up.

Donald Trump’s BIG announcement?

He has discovered through secret documents that mockery is alive and well in Twitter.

The announcement was immediately mocked on Twitter.

“Our expectations about @realDonaldTrump’s Obama announcement were clearly not low enough,” New York Magazine said on its Twitter feed.

“BREAKING: Donald Trump demands to know what medical school Dr. Dre went to,” Twitter user @BScalabrine24 wrote.

“Trump will give $5 million if Obama releases his college records,” @WatchJ tweeted. “I’ll give a crackhead $3 if Trump releases that squirrel sittin on his head.”

“BREAKING: Donald Trump replaces bed bugs as Americas #1 Pest,” Lizz Winstead wrote on Twitter.

“We’re going to make a very important cat announcement shortly that will change the internet,” BuzzFeed declared.

“Sorry Trump, but in the same way the U.S. doesn’t negotiate with terrorists, presidents shouldn’t negotiate with idiots,” @the_moonface wrote.

“This Donald Trump character is Andy Kaufman’s greatest bit ever,” Aaron Blitzstein tweeted.

“Donald Trump is the Honey Boo Boo of rich people,” @MorgonFreeman said.

“Trump, would you be a dear and offer 5 million dollars if Romney will reveal ANY PART of his economic plan?” Alex Baze wrote.

My BIG announcement?  I will give $5 cash American money to Americans With Tragic Hair Disabilities see Mitt Romney’s tax returns and, unlike Trump, I actually have $5 cash American money.

Thanks to Craig for the toon.

And the symbolism ….

A blimplike aircraft displaying a Mitt Romney campaign ad crash-landed in a field in Davie, Fla.

The craft, which was flying a sign with an image of the presidential candidate that read, “America Needs Romney,” was on its way from Boca Raton, where Monday night’s debate will be held, to North Perry Airport in Pembroke Pines.

Before ....

But, that’s not all.  No, siree, the symbolism marches on.

Teri Balter, a neighbor who witnessed the emergency landing, told NBC Miami, “We saw the blimp hovering over the house, and it was floating backwards.

Backwards.  That would be NOT Forward.

... After

And, no, I know what you’re thinking.  I did not stick pins in a voodoo airship to make that happen.

But, I would have if I had thought about it.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

Okay, brace yourself.

Apparently, Sarah Palin ain’t finished.

Sarah Palin decried President Obama’s handling of Libya on Wednesday in a Facebook post titled “Obama’s Shuck and Jive Ends With Benghazi Lies.”

“Why the lies? Why the cover up? Why the dissembling about the cause of the murder of our ambassador on the anniversary of the worst terrorist attacks on American soil?” Palin wrote. “We deserve answers to this. President Obama’s shuck and jive shtick with these Benghazi lies must end.”

Girl, you’re gonna drool all over your Manolo Blahniks, slip, and slide your little patootie all the way to Russia.

Just hush.  You could make the moon blush, Girl.

Thanks to Deb for the heads up.

Lubbock, Texas, is 250 miles from nowhere.  It’s at the crossroads of Hell and Hole Streets.

Being out there all isolated does strange things to people.  Remember this guy?

Lubbock Judge Tom Head told local news station Fox 34 that, if President Obama were to be re-elected, “civil unrest, civil disobedience, civil war maybe” would likely follow.

“And we’re not just talking a few riots here and demonstrations, we’re talking Lexington, Concord, take up arms and get rid of the guy,” Head said.

“Now what’s going to happen if we do that, if the public decides to do that? He’s going to send in U.N. troops. I don’t want ‘em in Lubbock County. OK. So I’m going to stand in front of their armored personnel carrier and say ‘you’re not coming in here,’” he said.

Well, it looks like he’s getting a leg up on getting this started.

In Texas, County Judges like Judge Head aren’t real judges.  Hell, the one we have in my county has a legitimate high school diploma but no actual degree beyond that.  For the most part, County Judges in Texas are the town drunk or, as in the case of Lubbock, the most ignorant redneck you can find.  I think a law was passed in 1999 that holds the same standard for Governor.

But I’ll say one thing for county judges – they sure know how to deface a sign.

Ya know, when I heard about Indiana Republican senate nominee Richard Mourdock say that pregnancy from rape is “God’s will,” my level of incredulous rose so high that it stopped things – evil things – from happening in my brain.  That’s God’s will to keep my sweet butt out of prison for going all Lorena Bobbitt on Indiana Republican senate nominees.

But that incredulous also kept a scripture out of my head until I was reminded of it this morning by someone gifted with a clear mind.

Luke 1:26-38 says that God Hisownself sent the Angel Gabriel to ask Mary’s permission prior to impregnating her with the Son of God.  The scripture says that Mary answered Gabriel, “I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May it be to me as you have said.”

If even God has to ask permission, do you think for one minute that it’s God’s will for mere mortals not to?  And contrary to what they believe, Republican men are, for the most part, mere mortals.  The ones that aren’t just mere mortals are first degree jerks.  True, there are far more of them in the second category.

Republicans are facing forty miles of rough road if they think women are going to give them clubs and willingly go back to the cave.

Can I get an Amen?

And thanks to customer Laura for this great YouTube.