Hey, don’t be messing with PumpkinChunkin.  PumpkinChunkin is very cool.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

It appears that hanging bites will be the issue in the Florida election this year.

[Susan] Bucher [Palm Beach Supervisor of Elections] said Palm Beach’s optical scan election system had – unbeknownst to anyone-mixed up the race results. As a result, the wrong winners and losers were called.

And Bucher says the very same thing could happen in the presidential election.

“You know the first thing that they tell you is you’re going to scare the voters,” Bucher said. “Well you know what… we’re scared too.”

Me, too.

Thanks to Fenway Fran for the heads up.

After Arkansas State Legislator Jon Hubbard oh so eloquently defended slavery, Benton County Republican Party Chairman Mike Sevak took a very controversial stand.

Sevak said he does not expect the group’s comments to hurt Republican chances in Arkansas this year. He did note his particular dislike of Mauch’s comments regarding Lincoln.

“Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation because he felt all people were created equally,” Sevak said. “I support the Emancipation Proclamation.”

And it took the Arkansas Republican Party only 144 years to support the Emancipation Proclamation.  That, my friends, is progress.

Thanks to Richard for the heads up.

Well, that’s not true.  I did send a donation online, though.

Deb Butler in North Carolina is my hero today.  What a gutsy sister to tell it like it is!

She picked up a vaginal probe, turned on the teevee cameras, and showed America what Republican men want to do to women.

In her ad, Butler shows one of the devices and says, “Few would dare show you this, but this is Thom Goolsby’s contribution to women’s health.”

“He promised us his first priority would be jobs, but instead he’s following us into the doctor’s office,” adds Butler.

Hell, yes, Girlfriend.  I want Deb in the State Senate of any state.

Thanks to Paul for the heads up.

Thelma had to sit me down and explain to me why someone would want to be an internet machine hacker to send out a virus.  What’s the reward in it for them?

Thelma explained that some people just need to be mean for meanness sake.  “I thought that’s what the Republican Party is for,” interrupted Verdelia.

Thelma conceded that there’s a whole lot in common.  Like Republicans, hackers think they’re showing you that they are smarter than you are.  But they both make a mess of things.

And that’s where I saw the difference.  There’s probably a few Republicans smarter than I am, but there’s not a one of them who’s going to heaven.  However, I will admit that internet hacker are a lot smarter than I am.  Honey, I have a PC and an iPad.  I just have to pray that nobody is looking when I keep punching my PC monitor expecting it to do something.  Repeatedly.  Like a damfool.  I can hear Buck Pochek snicker about it … even when he’s not there.

What brought this up is that there’s a new virus out there that customer Star warned us about.

Yesterday, at approximately 13:00 UTC, SophosLabs began receiving the first malicious emails targeting those interested in the upcoming United States presidential election.

The subject line for this spam campaign reads “CNN Breaking News – Mitt Romney Almost President”.

When opened it appears to be a CNN news alert with today’s top stories including the leading “More than 60 percent of votes will be in favor of Mitt Romney.”

Now, normally, I would assume that’s another batcrap crazy email from batcrap crazy Uncle Lenny who is convinced that Barack Obama is the devil, Stalin, and Lindsay Lohan wrapped into one neat package and I would delete it and say a prayer for Uncle Lenny’s sanity.

But, this sucker might fool me for a minute.

It looks kinda real.  However, if I were to believe it, I would not click on the link.  Nope, I would be too damn busy packing the salon up for outsourcing to the Caymans because that’s what Romney would do.

Thanks to Star for the heads up.

Yesterday morning, local Republicans smirked that nothing would come of the serial Republican voter fraud in True the Vote’s front yard.  GOP county commissioner candidate Bruce Fleming has purposefully double voted at least three times.

Do not mess with me.  Seriously.  And do not mess with Bev Carter.  Even I’m afraid of Bev Carter. Honey, she will shoot you, stuff you, hang you over her fireplace and then open her house for the home tour.

Front page of the Houston Chronicle this morning.

And the guffaw of the day comes from Fleming himself in the Chronicle article …

“The less said is better,” Bruce Fleming said when contacted by phone late Tuesday afternoon. “Until we can determine the situation, I can’t really comment.”

The less said is better?  Dude, how about the less voting is better?

And there’s  Channel 2 in Houston – that’s Bubba on the far right and the only time you’ll find him on the right.

By yesterday afternoon, former GOP county chairman and current Republican State House candidate Rick Miller, the person who has to take at least 50% of the blame for this mess, was described as “very pale.”  During a candidate debate in front of the teacher’s union, one of our most trusted Democratic candidates overheard Miller talking to the GOP sheriff candidate, fretting that this “might be a black day for Fort Bend Republicans.”  It is the first known time that “Fort Bend Republican Party” and “black” has been used in the same sentence.  Hell, even in the same conversation.  This party is whiter than angel dust in Antarctica.

In all honesty, I’ve never seen old white men dance around like their feet were on fire.  It’s damn entertaining.  Local GOP candidates who were Fleming’s best friend on Monday are claiming not to even know him today.  And the Republican Party organization who gave this guy $10,000 and nothing to other GOP candidates?  Oops, bookkeeping error.

Oh lookie, even their signs are holding hands.

Miller and Fleming are tighter than skin on a sausage.  And I am not the only person who thinks that Miller knew about the double voting, thought it was clever, and gave Fleming the first ever Precinct Chair of the Year Award while other Republican mouths dropped open because Fleming had done nothing to deserve it.

Rick Miller is a braggart and a thug and is going to do everything he can to embarrass the Republican Party once he’s elected to the State House.  Y’all, please vote for Rick Miller!

Thank you to all the people who kept my phone ringing off the wall last night.