Is Trump Eating Paper?
I want to tell y’all a story.
Omarosa claims that Trump eats paper. She saw him did do it.
I was relieved to hear this. I have often referred to the Trump administration as a goat rodeo and now I have verifiable proof of that.
There used to be a goat who got elected mayor of Lajitas, Texas. Lajitas is near the Big Bend. His name was Clay Henry and legend has it that he won the election because his only opponent was some guy from Houston. Lajitas is in far west Texas and back in the early 90’s they had a 9 hole golf course that was partially in America and partially in Mexico. They called it the Lajitas International Golf Course and Resort. Except there wasn’t any resort. To say it was a little rough is like saying New York City is a little big.
Anyway, the goat’s name was Clay Henry and he was the mayor of Lajitas. There was a saloon where you could buy a longneck and give it to Clay Henry. You just stuck out the bottle and Clay Henry would take it from you and guzzle it. Damnest thing you’ve ever seen and it delighted the little kids who stood in line to give Clay Henry a beer. It is said that Clay Henry didn’t drink any more than any other West Texas mayor and they are more than likely right. I’m speaking from first hand experience about all this.
Clay Henry, who is now referred to as Texas’ only Beer Drinking Dead Goat, met his end at the head butting of his son, Clay Henry II.
I’m just saying, we should be so lucky with Trump.
So this is where his executive orders come from…
1Gosh! Something new I check up on in my DSM!
2I always said Trump had delusions of Goat-dom when in reality he’s nothing but a Clout Demon.
GOAT = Greatest Of All Time
Clout Demon = Wannabe
Deb – who just spent a week with her grandkids.
3In a headbutt between Donald and Junior, the only sound would be a “mush” and both would walk away having gained an IQ point.
4I’m gonna start the guessing game – – what was the sensitive piece of information on that paper Trump ate?
“I’m sorry, but the doctor said my headache won’t go away until 2020.” – Melania
5…but the good news is (about my headache), at that time I can get a second opinion from my lawyer. -M
6As insane as this is remember two things.
7the demented ones aversion to a paper trail and a news story of the people in the Gov. records department reconstructing shredded and torn up documents from his office to ensure complainse with officila records laws.
This may be his reaction when he learned that gov. employees were salvaging those documents he was trying to deep six.
Lucky he didn’t try to emulate the british by burning them in the white house.
Though after he leaves it will be in such a need of a fumigation that fire might be the only way.
RAT45 is going to be spending a whole lotta paper on 10 November. More than $92 Million dollar bills worth of greenback paper for his big military parade through DC (BTW, our focking money).
Vlad, Kimmie, and Xi are going to be so impressed to see the Mango Mussolini standing up there trying to get a woody on.
Anyone else think that Donnei will get a specially tailored uberfancy uniform made up for this event?
Seig Heil!
8Sandridge, when I heard this I told my husband – What do you wanna bet he shows up with a white suit with a chest full of phony medals, just like the tinpot banana republic tyrant he is! Yukkkkk! Just thinking about it turns my stomach…
9That’s why he spends so much time on his golden throne!
10Anyone remeber Seinfeld episode of George’s fiancee dying from licking all the envolopes for the wedding invitations because george opted for the cheap envolopes.
11We should be so lucky if the paper choice in the white house has been coopted by demented donnie’s team in drive for “savings”
It was just a mistake. Don-don thought that it was the wrapper for a quarter-pounder.
12Sandridge: Hoo Hoo … the Pentagon has nixed Trump’s ego trip parade as being too expensive, and feels (and rightly so) the money would be better spent on caring for the vets. I wonder how many reams of paper he had had to eat after than rebuke!
13georgieporgie and Linda Phipps,
The Mango Mussolini RAT45 got the bad news axing his parade from the Pentagon and is already twitting, BLAMING THE DEMOCRATS for torpedoing his dictator’s wet dream scheme. His MAGAots are lapping it up:
Donald J. Trump
14at realDonaldTrump
The local politicians who run Washington, D.C. (poorly) know a windfall when they see it. When asked to give us a price for holding a great celebratory military parade, they wanted a number so ridiculously high that I cancelled it. Never let someone hold you up! I will instead…
Wow! Y’all read the comments at RAT45’s Twitter account ( @realDonaldTrump ) in response to his whining about the parade cancellation. Those commenter’s are just scathing in criticizing him. Those people have some stones to be writing that kind of stuff, under a signature too.
15The idea of Cadet Bonespurs concocting a fancy uniform brings back a vague memory of Nixon’s efforts at sartorial design:
http://www.weirduniverse.net/blog/comments/nixon_palace_guard
Yeah, I know it’s a Weird Universe link, but they have my favorite photo, the one that looks like Elvis had joined the Palace Guard. And it tells you where the uniforms ended up. Don’t miss the quote from the state’s federal surplus director: “They will be fine for a band”, Roller said. “But they did have sort of a Nazi connotation when they came out and that offended some people.”
Well, no longer, Mr. Roller. We’ve got an alleged president who thinks that the Nazis in Charlotsville last year included “some very fine people”, so in the White House nowadays the Nazi connotation is a benefit.
On the brighter side, maybe Sacha Baron Cohen can convince Trump that the Nixon uniforms are the Official President Viewing Military Parades uniforms. The ones used by all the greatest presidents like Andrew Jackson and Donald Trump, but that Obama never wore because he hated the military. If we can’t get rid of the fat fool, maybe we can at least get some amusing photos ….
16I remember those uniforms described as costumes from a comic opera, and derided as part of Nixon’s Imperial Presidency.
Once again, we can hear History rhyming.
17Honestly more Texas cities and counties should follow the pioneering lead of Lajitas and elect goats as mayor or county judge. Goats won’t do a worse job than some mayors or county judges of whom I am acquainted.
18