.

“Okay, Buckeroos and Buckerettes, we got some bad news on the horizon in Texas.  Rick Perry is pondering on being President.  Of the United States of America.  You know, the same United States he wants to secede from.  Just trying to figure that out ought to hurt your head.”

Perry has penned a book with national themes to be released a mere 13 days after the election. You can pre-order your copy of “Fed Up! Our Fight to Save America from Washington” in hardback or a virtual version for your Kindle.

GOP superstar of yore Newt Gingrich wrote the forward for the book. The former House speaker’s name has also been floated as a possible 2012 presidential nominee.

“Rick Perry is George Bush without the intelligence and charisma.  However, he is so slick that he can’t keep his socks up.  When someone once asked me to say something nice about Rick Perry, all I could come up with is that as far as I know he’s never purposefully had body odor.”

Now, what else Rick has planned might be what Bill White suggests —

White also figures Perry’s positioning himself to be a Sarah Palin-style rightwing commentator and author.

“Why else would he be writing a book rather than writing a balanced budget for the state,” White said.

It’s no secret that Texas, in spite of its success in job creation, is expected to have a shortfall in state government coffers of $18 billion or more.

Perry campaign spokeswoman Catherine Frazier apologetically declined a request for an interview with the governor.

“You know,” Juanita says, “I would think that a man who got rich off the public teat, won’t speak to the media,  and wants the taxpayers to fund his swanky lifestyle would never dream of getting elected President.  Then I remember George Bush.”

It could happen.