Attorney General Bill Barr heaved his butt on morning teevee this morning.  In a rambling lawyerite interview, he denied that chemical irritants were used on peaceful protestor at the White House.

MARGARET BRENNAN: There were chemical irritants the park police has said–

BARR: No, there were not chemical irritants. Pepper spray is not a chemical irritant. 

I can see where he got confused.  This was gluten-free, organic, natural, non-GMO, raised without cages pepper spray so that ain’t no damn chemical.

Hey, everything is chemical, except, you know, ideas — like peace, love, empathy, tolerance.  Everything else is a chemical.  In a restaurant (remember those?) some guy four tables over speaking very loudly is a chemical irritant.

Look, pepper spray ain’t Agent Orange, but it’s not Eau de Democracy either.

So, while Barr is Attorney General, pepper spray will be known as a spicy baptism.

Thanks to SGray for the heads up.