What? You Have Something Better to Do?

July 08, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

There’s one truth in America’s good manners book:  when the President of the United States of America comes calling, you open the damn door.

But then, Rick Perry was raised in a pig sty and had a tumbleweed for his only friend.

You know, we’re gonna have to clean chicken bones out from under the couch and get the washing machine off the front porch when he leaves the Governor’s mansion.  And I do not even want to imagine the fried pork skins oil on the walls.

President Obama is coming to Texas.   Rick Perry is refusing to come to the airport to shake his hand.  Rick is demanding a meeting or nothing.

Okay, somebody go stand in front of the Gov Shack with a bullhorn and holler:  “Rick, he’s the President of the United States of America and you’re the disgraced sixth place finisher in the New Hampshire primary.  You damn fool.”

Seriously, here’s a dude who got 0.71% of the vote in damn New Hampshire and spent a freekin’ fortune to do it.  Hell, Gingrich got 10% and even he knows he can’t boss around the President.

What is wrong with you, Rick?  Are those fake glasses giving you a headache?

perrynut

Look, somebody drive him to the airport and tell him that Mr. Tumbleweed is being held hostage but the Crips and the Bloods will release him if he shakes Obama’s hand.  Then somebody give the man a damn tumbleweed to talk to.  Don’t worry, by sundown he will have forgotten it ever happened.

 

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0 Comments to “What? You Have Something Better to Do?”


  1. Brian E says:

    Dear me. I do so love your writing, JJ.
    -b

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  2. The least Rick Perry could do would be to greet the President on the tarmac and wave one wicked finger in his face, a la Jan Brewer:

    http://i.huffpost.com/gen/732337/original.jpg

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  3. Semi-working washing machine on the porch next to the front door? Means there’s a non-working porcelain commode nearby.

    Pork rind grease eh? Kilz wont cover that well enough to paint over it.

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  4. Lorraine in Spring says:

    Gov Rick should invite him to his Ranch. What’s the name again?

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  5. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    President Obama is probably as ‘thrilled’ with the idea of shaking hands with pRick Perry, as he would be having a drink with Mitch McConnell.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBONa6UeKac

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  6. @Lorraine in Spring: FTW :))))

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  7. There’s a REAL easy fix to this. You just go meet him instead, Miz Susan. Take the whole beauty parlor with you. I know he’d be enchanted with Thelma and Miz Juanita Jean Herownself. Take the Honorables Wendy and Leticia with you.

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  8. Corinne Sabo says:

    Good thing he (his ickiness) doesn’t have 3 points to make.

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  9. maryelle says:

    Perry thinks he’s making points with the Party, but he’s really demonstrating how he could never be a diplomat, the leader of the free world. No smarts, no class and no way no how!

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  10. The Pres has called Perry’s bluff:

    According to Daily Kos
    Title: Rick Perry announces 2016 campaign
    Well, not in so many words, but for all intents and purposes, that’s what this pettiness amounted to…
    But instead of getting snippy at Perry’s childish snub, the White House decided to call Perry’s bluff and offered to rearrange the president’s schedule in order to have just such a meeting:
    Jarrett, senior advisor to President Obama, replied to Perry affirmatively, saying, “The president would welcome a meeting with you while he is in Texas.”
    So what began as Rick Perry scoring some 2016 points by heroically standing up to President Obama will end with him sitting down with the president. Ooops.

    The latest is that Perry is kinda trying to wiggle out of it.
    Hoist with his own petard.

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  11. Marge Wood says:

    Ohhhh goodie! Miz JJ, kin we all go? When do we need to be at the airport? I’ll go get a new pedicure if I have time.

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  12. @Jan – pRick Perry plays a poor game of checkers. President Obama is a master at 3-D chess. pRick is too dumb to know the difference.

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  13. BarbinDC says:

    Jan beat me to the punch. Game, set, and match!

    Back to etiquette: For most of this country’s history, one did NOT turn down a Presidential invitation, particularly to State Dinners (unless you had a really good reason, like you were dying). Until NOW, that is. The Orange One has never gone to one of those, even though–as Speaker of the House–he gets invited to all of them. Makes me wonder what Mrs. Orange One has to say about this.

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  14. Teh Gerg says:

    It’s not that Perry’s an idiot. It’s . . . well . . . oh, never mind. It is.

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  15. Sounds to me as though Perry is going the President a favor (unless anyone believes that greeting Perry is high on Obama’s wish list).

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  16. Wonder how Perry would do on an Alzheimer’s test? So much of his behavior is on par with Sterling’s over in California.

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  17. Even by Republican standards, Rick Perry is a total moron and clown. He is Louie Gohmert with hair.

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