Uh, There’s a Problem Involved
I once considered becoming a hoochy-koochy dancer just so I could use the name Hub Caps.
But, State Rep Bill Zedler is trying his damnest to ruin all my fun .
[Zedler’s] latest bill, which would regulate “sexually oriented” businesses, in part by requiring strippers to obtain and wear a license to work.
Okay, big guy, I have a question: where is she supposed to wear this license?
Thanks to Brian C for the heads up.
On a collar around her neck, of course.
1Depending on the size of the license, no problem, just substitute the license for someother article of clothing.
Hell, here I sat, working hard, smugly aware that I am so much more virtious than the majority of people you are watching on the electirc TV; but you ruined that for sure. My mind is now so far in the gutter that I could be mistaken for a GOP office holder.
Maybe at the Cowtown Stockshow some of the exhibitors will offer gin-you-wine cowhide license holders, G-string attached. Ooh!, there I go again.
2Is this what they really mean by a tattoo? Please do not ask me where! I am a good X-tee-an. I wasn’t geared for pore-nog-rafee.
3And what if SHE if a HE? I tell you, the possibilities are endless!
4Have y’all been posting comments on Think Progress? Sure sounds like the customers of TWMDBS to me.
5“Hub Caps”? Too much, JJ. How about:
6Candy Barr
July Raine
Bambi Thumper
Pouncing Panda
Koko Puffs
Penelope Pumpkins
… ok … I’ll stop now.
Steamy Mimi
7Hot House
Aulla Knight
Could the Southern Baptist Church be in charge of issuing permits? After all, the crowd is 40% Southern Baptist, 30% Catholic along with other assorted heathens.
8Oooh, male strippers…it gives me happy goosebumps to think of it. You do know I have to wear reading glasses, don’t you?
9The license should be made of fabric, fitted as needed, and called “Zedlerware.”
10Will this be like a license plate? The bolts will hurt….
11Is this the same rule as the City of Houston and Harris county? I think the dancers have to have ID at all times.
12So the customers get to know these workers real names….maybe the customers should be required to have this on display also…..so they(the dancers) know who is propositioning them with lewd comments. Only fair..
13Oh, man, John Peter, you raise an interesting point. Using a pseudonym is protection for the dancers against stalkers and such. Displaying their real name could be a threat to their safety.
But as for where, my thought was on their head in their hair.
14When the strippers apply for a license, will they be required to take a test? Bill Zedler may have just the person in mind to head that department. After all, he more than anyone else seems to understand how important it is to get strippers licensed. He could wear his “Bikini Inspector” t-shirt to work every day.
15Your pron name is the name of your first pet followed by the street you grew up on.
I’m “Bandit Peyton”
Just saying….
16Your porn name = first pet… street. That was on the teevee the other night. Was it “Bones” or “The Closer?”
17OK, I just remembered, it was “The Closer.” I only watch the teevee when I kitty-sit for friends, every several months. See what kind of stuff sticks when you watch for just a few hours during the year?
18I’d say a tattoo is the way to go. You could have a really cute one, you know.
19I think you should thank your lucky stars in Texas that your legislature meets for an incredibly low number of days every two years. If they met full time, things might be really unbearable.
20Lynne, I love the image I’m getting of you in your reading glasses taking a good look at the male strippers, getting up close to make sure everything’s in focus.
21First pet + street I grew up on = Galileo Central Park. Somehow I don’t think that is a winner.
22Caesar Hughes. Sounds more like a street tough from the fifties.
Now, most recent pet with current street = Twyla January. That’s more like it.
23Why does it cross my mind that this Zedler dude is going to appoint himself to the task of cruising around the strip clubs to check for compliance. On a legislative expense account, of course.
24Licensed to Thrill.
25@Jo: How ’bout Schotze Mt. Everest????
26@Jo – Suzie Nina. I wear trifocals. I’ll need to get up really close to those male strippers to see if they are in compliance. Whoo Hoo Happy Dance!
27Mine would be Sam Brock, which is very, very male.
Unlike me.
28Pet and street? Uh, let’s see……………Thunder Route 4
29I’m thinkin’ we all might just have way too much time on our hands!
I’ll check with RuPaul and see if Thunder Route 4 works.
First pet + street I grew up on. Leonardo DeLancey. Yeah… that’ll work (Leonardo was a turtle, if you’re wondering).
Pet now + street I live on? Yaquí 16 de Septiembre… NAH!
30Have you ever seen the game Headbanz? That takes care of where to put the license.
31There’s always the Hootchie ID Holder – favored by all drug runners
32That first pet and street naming is fun – wonder if I could make any money with:
Sugarfoot Matilda.
Thanks for the laughs. Seriously, my homestate and Tennessee are way too much in tune with the 18th century.
33First pet & street I grew up on: Rowdy St. Paul. I think we have a keeper!
34First pet – Delilah Ruskin – nah
35current pet – Prissy Deupree – That could be fun! Maybe Delilah Deupree…
This man does not like women does he?
he would make the women wear their name on a license(although he said they could cover their name) and take a course in human trafficking.
Yet he makes no mention of male strippers.
Yet the men(and women) in the audience have to do nothing.
If they didn’t pay for this service, would there be human trafficking?
If they didn’t pay for this, would there be an industry?
I think if the women need to wear a license, then the audience does too.
You know, just to make sure they are all 18. And they too need to take human trafficking courses, because you know, they support this with their money.
Good God, don’t these people know that their educational system is in chaos, and this is what they spend their time on?????
36Brian, Fifty or so years ago there was a (ahem) dancer with the stage name “Candy Barr.” There was also a Patty Dear, Bubbles Cash, and a Chris Colt who bragged of her twin 45s.
37If I go with the current pet and street, I get Penny Kane. That sounds like the somebody out of a Nancy Drew novel. I kind of like it. I think that might become my alter ego.
38“Good God, don’t these people know that their educational system is in chaos, and this is what they spend their time on?????”
@Diane,
Where do you think all these politicians (without brains, or common sense) come from……. if not out of this chaotic educational system?
None of this happened yesterday. Texas has been “dumbing down” people for years. And most of them run for office, at some point or other. And, get elected by like minded folks.
Then, we have people in office proposing legislation like this. If we didn’t laugh about it….. we would all probably go nuts.
39Speaking of dumbing down…. anyone catch Piers Morgan’s attempt to interview that talk show yahoo from Dallas who started the petition to deport Piers for his stand against assault weapons? THAT’s who elects the Texas Lege and Congressional folks, THAT’s who is going to the mat against any changes to Amendment 2, and THAT’s why everyone thinks Texans are nuts…. There are far-far too many seemingly good-hearted Texans on the surface that are just like that bozo if you barely nick the surface. Scarey.
40Pet + street = Buster Longfield… hmmmm… I’m okay with that.. LOL
41Pet+ street: Baby Bain Place. Hmmm. Boring.
42Present: Beau Ivanhoe or Fleur Ivanhoe. Still boring. I guess my choice for a second career is a wash out.
Uncle Dave: I remember Candy Barr, or at least we had a family vacation in New Orleans and I remember the grown-ups talking about her. Was she the one who could get the tassels on her pasties swinging in opposite directions at the same time?
Way too much time on our hands! But fun!! I wish someone would organize a TWMDBS convention!
Pet + street Prissy McKinley. I think I like it!
43Ah-h-h, Theresa (Bubbles) Cash, Dallas Cowboy fan and pre-cheerleader, Theater Lounge, Commerce Street.
44Dang, I’m old.
I’d be Candy Royce. That would work.
45If I count my parakeet, I’d be Pinky Royce. I’m good with either. When do we all start?
46I grew up on Albatross Dr, and my current St is “New Baden-Mt Pleasant Road!” Better not quit my day job!
47I’m not gonna dance using the name “Princess Center”. Bet I could make a few dollars as a male dancer. I can envision those small coins flying towards the stage with cries of, “Put it on, put it all on”.
48Jan, Chris Colt was the one who was anatomically equipped to rotate her tassels in opposite directions, while remaining virtuous of course. (And thank you for providing me with an opportunity to prove that I do know how to spell virtuous.)
49@ John Peter and Susan: Is Zedler pushing this ID thing because he finally figured out his ‘girlfriends’ keep giving him fake contact info?
50