The Tarp
The news media has found a 56 year old man at the Oregon headquarters of Vanilla Isil. He’s fully armed, sitting under a tarp in a damn rocking chair, awaiting the enviable battle with federal agents over snacks, clean socks, and that their fraternity brothers don’t go the jail for burning federal land.
It’s quite a sight.
The response on Twitter has been fast and funny.
For example:
.
He’s threatening to shoot any federal agent who pulls a gun on him.
He does know that he can’t see them, right? He does know that they can walk right by him, right?
Thanks to everybody for the heads up.
He just gave away his IQ rating – minus zero!
1To answer your questions,Ms JJ,I’m gonna guess Tarpman does not know that he can’t see them and in all likeihood,being the responsible gun owner he is under that tarp,will prolly shoot himself in his confusion. That might still set off the nutters for a full scale massacre.
2Newsflash!!!!
The FBI has sent Special Agent Lon Horiuchi to settle the stalemate with Vanilla ISIS and Y’allquida in Oregon. Film at 11.
3😉
Reminds me of “I’ve decided I no longer want to be an adult. If anyone wants me, I’ll be in my couch cushion fort, coloring.”
4Anyone could come up behind that fool and totally bushwhack his stupid ass! Give him a quick smack up along his pointed head with the butt of the gun, and then shoot his stupid ass!! He’d never know what hit him!!
And now they have issued their “directives!” What a bunch of maroons!!
5According to Horiuchi-the FBI does not fire warning shots. Checkmate.
6Y’all Quackers is trying to distinguish itself from Y’all Crackers, as if being too st00pid to poke eye holes in one’s sheet is a distinguishing trait.
7I hope he has a pile of clean underwear.
8Oh Bullcrud! He’s got a flashlight under there and is surfing Internet porn! Don’t even try to BS me!
9There’s a petition to the White House asking that the Bundys be charged with sedition, and it needs a lot more signatures.
https://petitions.whitehouse.gov//petition/charge-ammon-bundy-cliven-bundy-and-his-armed-supporters-sedition-under-18-us-code-ss-2384
I think you have to register to sign these petitions, but it’s fairly painless and you don’t get spammed (unlike the 432,000 other petitions I’ve signed).
10Rhea, thanks. We signed! Also passing the petition on to a few more sites and our e-mail list.
11Rhea: Thanks. Just did. Enough with this human garbage!
12E platypus: If he shoots himself in his confusion, where will the bullet lodge? Just asking…
Signed the petition. Oh I hope these yahoos end up in the sneezer for a long time.
13I”d love to have a cheap drone to fly in there at the legal height of 400 feet and see what would happen.
14Do click on the link. The twitters are worth it and so is the Interview Under Tarp.
15You got it,Mary Beth-the bullet will lodge in his confusion. Nutters prolly hand out extra snacks for being wounded in the confusion.
16They’re trying to set up their own cowliphate! Hahahahahahahaha!
(That’s not original with me. I read it on twitter a couple days ago.)
17“He does know that he can’t see them, right? He does know that they can walk right by him, right?”
don’t you? it’s a Klingon cloaking device, rendering him invisible to everyone around him. ok, maybe he’s just an idiot.
18Perhaps Tarpman, like the apocryphal ostrich with his head in the sand, believes that if he can’t see federal agents then they can’t see him.
19So at Marion fka MM’s suggestion I read the tweets on the link. Snacks? They asking for snacks? So just how much weed do you gotta smoke that you wind up going onto the interweb world wide thingy begging for munchies?? Hell this isn’t JUST a Brokeback Mountain top experience for these dudes is it?? Yimminy!
20BTW, the tweet that includes the take on the ZZ Top lyric “Cause every girl crazy ’bout a tarp dressed man…” rules the twitterverse, IM<HO!
21He must think it’s Harry Potter’s Invisibility Cloak. Seems that all of these nutters are deep into fantasy.
22As long as he’s beneath the tarp, treat him to a blanket party. Take a length of stiff rubber hose and whack some sense into him.
23Able to leap into lawn chairs in a single bound..
Able to see through woven plastic…
Able to sleep faster than a speeding thought…
It’s TARPMAN!
24Debbo, “cowliphate” has such potential. It could be #cowflop, or #coward’sfate, etc.
25I think Tarpman’s real first name is LaVoy. LaVoy Finicum in total. As far as I know, he’s been the only one who has vowed he will never go to prison. He means to take others with him. If he freezes to death in his “snow fort,” good riddance.
26Can’t see me, can’t shoot me?
27Y’know if you are really knowledgeable about the genetics of intellect and know how it is and isn’t inherited from generation to generation, it must drive you crazy to look at somebody like ole Lavoy and not think how sadly wrong we have gone. Of course these folks would think anything I opined about reproduction counseling would be aimed at some other group, not themselves. They would of course be wrong.
28On the plus side these yo-yos aren’t reproducing when they are on maneuvers in state buildings.
PETA dropped by and left some vegan jerky snacks or something,so the story goes.
29Tofu jerky?
I’d choose prison.
30