Okay, here’s the deal.  There’s a mess of stuff on my mind this morning, so here goes.

Remember how I told you that the Brazos River was going to crest on Wednesday morning and that’s when I’d know if I was going to flood or not?  Then it became Thursday afternoon, then early Friday morning.  I was too tired to wait it out so when my feet hit a dry floor this morning, I started singing the Hallelujah Chorus using my bedside table as drums.  Scared the crap outta Bubba, who assumed I was in labor or something.

Then I checked the local police department to see how high the river got when it crested.

Damn.

The river, they are saying, now won’t crest until …

So, the way I see it, this is Texas so we are bound to have a drought before the river crests so I’m just holding out for it.

And we are up to our necks in water but it doesn’t matter much because you can’t breathe the air above the water.

Yes, Houston is having an Ozone Action Day.  That means we have both hell and high water.

And there is no climate change.  None.  All this is just because we are heathens and need more prayer.  How do I know that? Because the Texas Secretary of State – who is appointed by the Governor – says so.

Quebec’s Minister of International Relations Christine St-Pierre called [Secretary of State Rolando] Pablos  to express her sorrow and condolences on behalf of the people of the Canadian province. She also offered equipment and manpower.

Pablos turned it down. Instead he asked for “prayers from the people of Quebec,” the minister relayed.

Look, Rolando, you damn fool, that was an answered prayer.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.