The Republican Presidential candidates got together and had a contest to see who loves  fetuses the most.

It was a testy event, with humans willing to kill each other over how much they love fetuses.

There was crazy stuff brought by Michelle Bachmann who claims that President Obama wants to “put abortion pills for girls 8 years of age, 11 years of age, on the bubblegum aisle.”  It is suspected that she means the morning after pill being over-the-counter, which, of damn course, President Obama and Kathleen Sebelius strongly rejected.  But in Bachmann’s pretend world ….

And Rick Perry had a Come-to-Fetus moment where he decided that rape and incest are a dandy way for women to have children because of something some woman said to him just recently.  God only knows what she said but you can bet it had less to do with abortion than it did with money and power. He said otherwise ….

I will suggest to you that as I signed that [Personhood] pledge … God was working on my heart.”

Sweetie, God needs to work on your head, not your heart.

And Newt Gingrich is starting to make Ron Paul look sane.  Honestly, I don’t think Newt would be stable even if you mounted him on a tripod.  Every time I head one of Newt’s new ideas about government, I feel like I’m wading in quicksand over hell.

Not only is he going to stomp all over an independent judiciary and install himself as King of America, but now he’s shooting for King of the World …

Gingrich went a step further, however, promising, to “overhaul the U.S. Foreign Service to get rid of the people who are aggressively pro-abortion and aggressively trying to pressure other governments into adopting pro-abortion positions.”

Oh yeah, we need more starving children.  I wonder if Newt can increase his line of credit at Tiffany’s.

Y’all, I lost a bet last night.  I had bet a homemade cheesecake that the Republican candidates had bottomed out two weeks ago.  That was a dumb bet.  There is no OFF button to insane.  I gotta write that down somewhere.