The Bush Boys and Their Dazzling Metaphors
Okay, so you’d think the Bush Boys would know that they do not have the necessary genes appropriate to conveying parables, metaphors, or, for that matter, speaking English proficiently.
But ya gotta give them an A for effort.
You know the metaphor where you put a frog in a pan of cold water and slowly turn up the heat? And how the frog will not notice and allow itself to eventually boil?
Jeb! tried to explain the United States slipping into the horrific evil of something-or-other, and decided that a megaphone would be just grand.
Then, Mr. Bush went for the frog metaphor. And that’s where the problem for him began.
“It’s like the crabs in the, you know, whatever —the crabs in the boiling water,” Mr. Bush tried.
“Frogs,” an audience member shouted out, helpfully.
“The frogs,” Mr. Bush continued. “You think it’s warm, and it feels pretty good and then it feels like you’re in a whirlpool—you know, a Jacuzzi or something.”
He concluded with a morbid twist: “And then you’re dead. That’s how this works.”
Ya can’t get fooled again.
By the way, the horrific evil was free college tuition.
Thanks to Marge and Will for the heads up.
Another graduate from the Sarah Palin School of Verbal Arts and Salad Making.
1To borrow one from you, watching the Bush Leaguers in action is more fun than recess in heaven.
2All the Bush children got free college tuition. Free to them, anyway, since their parents were loaded.
3There’s ample evidence that Babs was loaded during at least two of her pregnancies.
4It’s pure coinicidence that the Bush boys’ eyes touch.
5Amazing! They lived and still live close enough to Canada to know that the Canadian public school system provides an extra year in public school after graduation. This is comparable to the first year of college,hence, the entire duration of a Canadian college education is less that the four years American kids spend on a college campus. And its cheaper! But, what the hey, the Bushies went Ivy League so what the bleep do they really, really know!
6I am never stepping foot in a jacuzzi again.
7Cheryl, if Jeb or any other Bush were in the jacuzzi, I would agree with you. Then I would turn up the heat and see what happened.
8#TFP
9I’m guessing that crabs(STDs) would be a subject the dumbass dubya bros would be knowledgeable about. Could even rot their brains if they had any.
10I mis-guessed that one. I figured Jeb? was heading to a frog-in-a-blender joke.
Horrific evil of free and universal education ehhh? No epsilons for the GOP’s corporate overlords to use and abuse? Aldous Huxley indeed!
11I hate this metaphor, as it is entirely false. You cannot slow boil a live frog without it reacting.
12As for Bush’s. I think the scorpion and turtle parable is better. They just can’t tell the truth, it’s not in their nature.
I wish I had to make up stuff like this; the reality is too darn twisted.
13I have to sympathize with anyone foolish enough to sign up for the GOP candidacy for President. My mind would go totally blank after standing there and saying for the 12th or 40th or 75th time the same thing over and over. I’d think, now did I say that or not? or have I already said it here but not in Austin? Maybe we oughta send him a sympathy card, esp. with his insaner competition. Imagine having Trump or Carson echoing around in your brain every day. Blech.
14Wow! He sure can’t think on his feet, can he? I guess if he were POTUS and holding a presser, he’d need someone in the press pool to help him complete his sentences.
15Haven’t his donors run screaming from him yet? The longer this primary drags on, the more surreal it gets.
16I think Job! was going to say:
“It’s like the crabs in the, you know, whatever the
crabs in your underpants,” Mr. Bush tried.
And it was all downhill from there. Anyways, it has been and Bless his heart. Pretty soon he will bow out and then what in the heck can this guy do in the real world? He is terrified of
17having to live outside the bubble, and have to get a real job.
Oh, Job! I would hate to be you.
Actually the metaphor works rather well for student loans if you think about it.
18Well we have two thirds of the OZ adventurers: Nastee Cruz needs a heart, Bush needs a brain (a tie with Carson) and they ALL have guts. It would take guts to actually go out in public and offer their rancid political ideas.
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