Texas: Where Jesus Hangs Out A Lot
About a decade ago, I told you about a lady in East Texas who found Jesus on her laundry room floor.
She explained …
“I’m not trying to show off, but I feel like I should share it with everyone,” Lacina said. “The Lord wouldn’t appreciate it if I didn’t show it to anyone.”
Well, it appears that every decade or so, God comes to East Texas.
One East Texas man believes he found fossils from Noah’s flood and a self-proclaimed fossil expert says he’s right.
“From Noah’s flood to my front yard, how much better can it get,” Wayne Propst said.
Yeah, the Indiana Jones of Tyler. (Click here for a fabulous two minute video.)
The teevee station, in the interest of fairness and egg on their face, concludes …
For the record, we have not independently verified if the rocks are in fact historic.
Yeah, but who wants to ruin a good tourist business.
Thanks to Lorraine in Spring for the heads up.
Unbelievable! Reverence shown for the laundry floor, pop tarts, toast and grilled cheese sandwiches. But when it comes to the Bundy moochers welfare ropers and their ilk, respect for First Nation artifacts, meh, not so much. Or, private property and Native American burial sites along the Rio Grande, again meh, if it means interfering with building the Great Trump Wall. History and culture rate less than delusions in bread crumbs and concrete.
1As a “self-proclaimed education expert”, I declare that everyone involved here, including the reporter, news announcer, news editor, and anybody else with any authority at that TV station, is as ignorant as that dirt. Now I need a couple of aspirin or a good stiff drink.
This is what happens when religion takes charge of public schools, regardless of the Constitution or any Supreme Court decisions. At least this guy knows about dinosaurs, but I guess somebody told him they died out because they didn’t fit on the ark.
2He needs to get out more. Those fossils are as common as dirt, literally, in the hill country of Texas.
3It goes without saying that she’s “…not trying to show off…” because her laundry room floor is filthy. Now that’s the real intention, not having to clean the floor, ’cause…Jesus.
4Guns and religion! Gawd save us.
Well, at least the teevee station labeled the “fossil expert” as “self-proclaimed – cuz he certainly is that. And, he must be right that those snails fell off the ark cuz HE never heard of snail fossils in Texas before. Yep, that proves it, OK.
Of course, that sea that used to stretch across the entire Midwest couldn’t have anything to do with snail fossils in TX. There couldn’t possibly be any connection at all. It MUST have been The Flood. Cuz it was reported on the teevee machine. Further proof.
5I haven’t access to Jesus’ travel schedule, but I doubt that He or his Dad has ever spent any time in east Texas. I’ve been there frequently, including this past week-end. I said “God forsaken” more than once to my little bride as we sought to avoid IH-45 between DFW and Houston. We saw spots names Trinity and Dodge and Coldspring. We heard Dueling Banjoes from the forest around Coldspring. But with 18-wheelers running in packs of 6 to 16 on IH-45, Coldspring it is!!
6Any actual fossil expert will notice that those things are a whole lot older than 6,000+/- years.
Jeez, these people.
7Rhea-there were three gay T-Rexes on the Ark and their story picks up after they ate everything and everyone else on board.
Hungry as hell no food to eat
And Joe said that he would sell his soul
For just a piece of meat
Water enough to drink for two
And Joe said to me, “I’ll have a swig
And then there’s some for you.”
Timothy, Timothy, Joe was looking at you
8Timothy, Timothy, God what did we do?
MY humblest apologies. Gay was meant to be guy.
9Geez,get a brain onion. The lyrics are compliments of the song Timothy by the Buoys-for rock afficianados.
10Aw, the fossil guy in east Texas was just feeling left out cuz je found out about the fossil deluge up north in the Badlands! Poor baby!!!!
11So Texas has a whole lot of decaying fossils? Why is that headline news? We’ve seen who gets elected in Texas.
12LynnN wins the internet today. 🙂 🙂 🙂 that is worth 3 smileys.
13Our third child and her best friend used to bring home pockets full of fossils from the playground in Trent, Texas. I never knew the Flood went that far.
14Why does everything look like Jesus to these people? Are they sure it’s not Judas? Or Bob? Or Bobbette, if she has a facial hair problem?
15I grew up in N. Illinois and there was this sandpit that we’d go play in every once in a while and we would dig in that sand to discover the little shells in that sand! As kids, we knew we’d find some and I don’t recall ever thinking they came from the Flood. LOL
16It would seem grade school kids in N. IL are smarter then some dude in Texas!
The East Texas fossil hunter looks a lot like the preacher in the new Netflix movie Don Verdean (Biblical archaeologist):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Kf1WAcs6gs
17That stain on the laundry room floor reminds me more of Dan Patrick.
18So he found snail fossils. It just proves Louis Gohmert’s family has been around East Texas longer than most.
19Well that’s the best he can do to keep his supposed promise to be right back.
20In Chicago back in 2005, we had Our Lady of the Underpass.
http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2013/05/03/play-recalls-story-of-our-lady-of-the-underpass/
21Why would jeebus hang out in Texas? Leaving a single virgin aside,what are the chances of finding 3-count em-three wise men in Texas?
22Hahahahahahahaha! epo, 3 wisemen! Hahaha!
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