Texas Puns

February 07, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Texas Senator John Cornyn, who used to be only 80% worthless, has announced this morning that he is going to vote NO on the Violence Against Women Act today, thereby losing his last 20%.

Locals are saying that Cornyn is on Cruz Control.

Ted Cruz that is.

Texas Republicans are threatening to primary Cornyn so he had to come out in favor of violence against women. Holy crap.

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0 Comments to “Texas Puns”


  1. Bud Malone says:

    Back in my younger days, much younger I might add, a high forehead was a sign of intelligence. How wrong we were.

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  2. Melissa Roth says:

    Jeez, with this new Cruz effect on the senate (note what he is doing to Chuck Hagel nomination) we should be able to front a decent Dem to run against Cornyn. I totally agree that he is now 100 (maybe 110)% worthless.

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  3. Lorraine in Spring says:

    Here’s a true story for John Cornyn & others who don’t support the VAWA:

    In 1902, in Italy, St. Maria Goretti died from 14 stab wounds she suffered while fighting off a sharecropping neighbor, 20-year-old Alessandro Serenelli, as he tried to rape her. She was just short of her 12th birthday. Maria forgave her attacker from her deathbed.

    In 2003, in Philadelphia, a group of 20 Catholic school girls tackled their alleged neighborhood flasher — while still dressed in their traditional school girl garb — because they were tired of the suspect’s antics.

    The school girls proceeded to chase the man 3 blocks down the street before wrestling him to the ground. The girls said a few of them kicked the suspect after tackling him.

    While he was on the ground, the suspect pulled out a small Swiss Army knife, according to police. Kopicko said she kicked it out of his hand.

    With the aid of a male passerby, the girls held the suspect until police arrived, authorities said.

    The suspect was treated at a Philadelphia hospital for minor injuries to his mouth.

    Police charged the suspect with harassment, stalking and indecent exposure.

    The girls were responsible for removing a sexual predator from our society, just as their school’s namesake – St. Maria Goretti, patron saint of youth, young women, purity, and victims of rape – did in Italy during the summer of 1902.

    To those wishing to use Violence Against Women as a political football: YOU WILL LOSE.

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  4. If we are lucky…. Cornholio will get primaried… and we’ll get another darling of the teagaggers, like Ted Cruz, to be the opponent. Cornholio will of course be defeated, and if the Democrats are smart… we will have a well-funded, bright, articulate candidate to run against him…. and Dems will pick up another Senate seat.

    I know… from my mouth to God’s ear….

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  5. @Mz Patti,
    From your lips to God’s ears.

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  6. 1toughlady says:

    I can’t think who the Democrats will get to run, though. Any ideas?

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  7. Wish those 20 Catholic school girls would pay a similar visit to some key bishops, archbishops & cardinals. The US Conf. of Catholic Bishops, aka the good ole’ boys club, are whining AGAIN about Obama not going far enough to ban contraception coverage. Maybe if those girls swiftboated those men right in their you-know-whats, they would get out of women’s private parts!!

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  8. Yo, don’t mess with Philly girls or what?

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  9. Absolutely detest Cornyn.. the only response I ever get to any queries I send his office is a request for campaign donations.. though his replacement would likely be a complete teaparty idiot (come on people… vote for a Dem!) at least I could be happy that Cornyn would be unemployed… man do I want that!

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