It’s time for this to end

March 28, 2024 By: Nick Carraway Category: Uncategorized

It was P.T. Barnum that said that a sucker was born every minute. I’m not going to question what people spend their money on. Goodness knows I’ve bought some useless crap over the years. I’ve been snookered by marketing gimmicks and charlatans just like anyone else. So, if someone is going to throw down 60 bucks on the Trump Bible then Godspeed.

Advertising has always been a somewhat unsavory business where facts and slight of hand are married in a shotgun ceremony. Just this week I noticed that Appleby’s is bragging that their boneless wings won a national taste test including a restaurant with wings in its name. Number one, aren’t boneless wings just chicken nuggets? Secondly, you have to know it was a blind taste test between Appleby’s, Bennigan’s, and TGI Fridays. Congratulations.

So, when I saw Trump selling his own Bible it didn’t surprise me. The fact that he was partnering with someone like Lee Greenwood didn’t surprise me. The only thing that surprised me about the whole deal is that Lee Greenwood is still alive. I could have sworn he died in obscurity when his shitty patriotic porn finally fell out of favor. Everything old is new again.

This isn’t new ground. My parents used to regale me with stories about the radio station that drowned out the locals at night. They would have a variety of shows and one that sold religious artifacts. It included things like the John the Baptist soap on a rope and autographed pictures of Jesus. No, what Trump is doing it not new and not novel.

I suppose in a way he isn’t even the worst one. Televangelists bilk their followers for thousands of dollars and it is usually thousands they can’t afford to give away. So, who knows where on the pantheon of sleeve these Bibles would rate. It is more pathetic than anything else. Add it to his action figures, shoes, and all of the other crap he peddles and it’s just sad.

I’m more and more convinced that Trump is nothing more than a thought experiment. How far are we willing to go before we either put him in jail or tell him to go away? When will the Republican party say enough is enough? Will they ever say it? What will the last straw be for people in MAGA nation? It’s not even certain that there will be an end.

Trump outrage is its own cottage industry. You have to know that networks like MSNBC, CNN, the Young Turks, and other similar networks secretly love this. They are rolling in ratings and advertising dollars. Every tweet, every insane rant, every trial development gets covered in breathtaking immediacy. It’s all breaking news. It’s all developing news. It’s all the most important thing that’s ever happened in the history of the world.

Let’s consider what we know. We know he has always failed at business. We know he is the most frequent litigant in the history of the country. We know he has committed countless amounts of fraud. We know he is guilty of how many counts of sexual misconduct. We know he is addlebrained and unfit any position of leadership. We’ve seen it first hand.

It’s not funny anymore. When we went through those first four years it ceased to be funny. It’s time for him to exit stage left. If need be, maybe we can use one of those old Vaudeville hooks to yank him offstage. Maybe he can have his own channel where he can sell his shitty shoes, overpriced Bibles, and can run infomercials with Lee Greenwood, Jon Voigt, and Kid Rock for 24 hours. Then, at least I could avoid it by simply not turning on that channel. I’m out.