Worst Super Bowl Half-time Show EVER
Completely off normal topics, did anyone happen to see the halftime show during the Super Bowl last night? Holy Jesus. That had to be the worst selection of half-time entertainment in the history of half-time entertainment. It’s even worse than the famous incident where Justin Timberlake ripped off Janet Jackson’s bra cup during the 2004 Super Bowl half-time show. For those of you fortunate enough to have missed this year’s catastrophe, the entire performance was by a guy from Canada who calls himself The Weeknd, but whose real name is Abel Tesfaye. His weird trademark is performing wearing bandaids/bandages sometimes with fake blood on his face. It’s just weird. I’m an old Stones fan, so I get weird, but this guy is WEIRD.
His performance for the Super Bowl was this dark dystopian vision that began with hundreds of ghoulish ghost-like figures in the end zone stands with glowing eyes that revealed themselves as orchestra members. Unsettling, to say the least. When The Weeknd came out on stage, I didn’t recognize him because he WASN’T wearing bandages and I’d never seen him without them. At first, I thought it was strange that Jake from State Farm was doing the half-time show since, after all, he was wearing a red jacket, but then realized who it was. The setting and the stage was so dark and the sound was so terrible that I couldn’t even tell what the tunes were that he was singing. His second song was under that stands in a golden hall of distorted mirrors where he was carrying the camera himself doing a moving selfie, surrounded by a bunch of other guys also in red jackets but wearing bandages over their heads that resembled upside down jock straps.
Then came the worst part…The Weeknd came out onto the field, joined by about 500 more guys with jock straps on their heads all marching to the beat. It looked like a take off of the rallies that the Nazis held in 1930s in Germany. It was surreal, almost scary. Mercifully, the performance ended and we returned to funny commercials. I looked at Ms. Jefe and all I could say was, “That was weird.” Because it was.
We’re coming off one of the worst years in US history. Millions of Americans are unemployed. The economy (not the stock market) is in the ditch. Many businesses are closed, schools are closed, and everyone, except the very wealthy class, is struggling. We’ve had 27 million Americans infected with the virus and over 450,000 dead. The Super Bowl is the FIRST major event in almost a year that is supposed to be a celebration of football, funny commercials, heavy drinking, terrible food, and spectacular half-time shows. Some of the best performers on the planet have appeared in past years, from the Stones, to J Lo and Shakira, to U2, to Prince, to Bruno Mars, to Maroon 5, to Beyoncé, to Lady Gaga, to Madonna, to…you get the picture. What everyone needed this year was a spectacular, flashy, fun, and uplifting show. What they got was a modern version of Thriller with the zombies wearing jock straps on their heads.
Now I ask you: What genius at the NFL said, ” I have a great idea! Let’s host some red jacket wearing guy unfamiliar to 90% of the audience singing songs you never heard of or couldn’t understand, joined on field with 500 male dancers also wearing red jackets with the addition of jock straps on their heads. Add ghosts, lots of shadows, and a golden hall of distorted mirrors and that’s a winning combination, right? Happy days are here again, right?”
That guy needs to be reassigned to managing the locker room for some XFL team.