Susan Collins Has Been Busy
To start off, Collins stood with a straight face and heard Texas Senator Ted Cruz talking to the teevee news …
“Look, we shouldn’t be shutting the government down. I have consistently opposed shutdowns. In 2013, I said we shouldn’t be shutting the government down,” Cruz told reporters on Monday.”I went to the Senate floor repeatedly asking unanimous consent to reopen the government.”
Being as how most senators lay the blame for the shutdown directly at Cruz’s feet (Remember Green Eggs and Ham?), and Cruz was one of the 18 senators who opposed stopping the 2013 shutdown, Collins was … well …
“You’ve rendered me speechless,” she said, then paused. “2013. 2013.”
Then, truly bless her heart, she tried to get a group of bipartisan senators together in her office to negotiate during the shutdown. She tried a schoolteacher idea, a talking stick. Only the person holding the stick gets to talk, everyone else has to listen until they get the stick.
It worked fine until … (You know what’s coming, right?)
At one point, Sen. Lamar Alexander of Tennessee forcefully tossed the stick toward Sen. Mark Warner of Virginia after Warner interrupted him, nearly shattering a glass elephant belonging to Collins, according to two people briefed on the throw.
Collins reportedly decided to switch to a ball after the dustup, presumably assuming it would be a little less destructive.
Yes, because grown Republican men cannot be trusted with a stick.
Thanks to everybody for the heads up.
So a member of the House of Lords threw another Lord’s talking stick? How about Play Doh? Or Jelly? Did he throw jelly as well? Was Greg Giantfart there as well? Enquiring minds want to know!
1The guy that needs talking stick lessons is Chris Mathews.The guy has a wealth of experience but he negates that with a mouth that runs away with his brain. Stop interupting!!!!!
2In 1900 Republican Teddy Roosevelt wrote:
I have always been fond of the West African proverb: “Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far.”
How far the party has come in just over a hundred years! No more quoting African people as if they have anything of value to offer this country. Instead, Republicans would rather deport folks back to the s–tholes from whence they believe they came.
Republicans in 2018 seem now to think:
3“Shout loudly!!! And throw a stick, you might hit something that screams. Or cries!”
Not that I would ever trust the quisling, backpedaling Maine Senator Moosenose for any kind of momentous deal, but she sure seemed to get in a few good cuts on DetesTED, of whom none is more deserving of it.
The kindergarten “talking stick” is a darned good idea, but too advanced for most of those GOPtards, a slightly used tennis ball (or nerfball) might be more age&attitude-appropriate for them.
4The sharpest thing some Republicans can be trusted with is a rubber ball. And that goes double for Donnie. Even then he might swallow it, but small loss if so (except for the loss of the ball).
5All they needed was the fire to burn the stick that wouldn’t beat the dog that wouldn’t bite the hog that won’t jump over the stye so I can get home tonight.
6Warner is D from VA. Lamar A is Republican from Tennessee, been around forever.
7“grown Republican men cannot be trusted with” . . . anything, including their very own teeny weeny.
8Trevor Noah did a fabulous take-off on the talking stick! He swears that nob in Africa (where the idea of the stick supposedly me from) used a talking stick and he hopes that susan did not get conned by some guy on the sidewalk who assured her the stick was magic and even more magic for 500 bucks!
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