Strike Three: Grab Some NOT Bench

May 07, 2016 By: Primo Encarnación Category: Uncategorized

For our foreign readers, “grab some bench” is an American sports idiom which, roughly translated, sometimes means “you’ve done all you can, sit down and let us take it from here.” As in so many other things, (“bless his heart” springs to mind) tone and context are key, so “Sit your sorry butt down you’re making a fool of yourself and you’re making the rest of us look bad,” is actually a more common reading.

Example:

In Ala-damn-bama, where erstwhile Chief Justice Roy Moore sits astride the judicial bench, an ethics panel has told him to leave that real bench and grab some metaphorical kind.  The Alabama Judicial Inquiry Commission  filed abuse of power charges stemming – as they always do – from Judge Roy Moore acting not like the Chief Justice of  the Alabama Supreme Court, but rather the Chief Justiciar of the Lord Almighty (who, in Judge Roy’s head, may actually be the same Himself).   Until the matter is resolved, Roy Moore is suspended from the Alabama Supreme Court… again!

Huzzah!

All this stems from the shenanigans Judge Roy pulled after SCOTUS ruled in favor of gay marriage last year.  When we last discussed Roy’s jurisprudery, SCOTUS had slapped him upside the headfake he had made towards contrition, but still wouldn’t allow marriage certificates to be issued.

Strike one was when he was de-Justiced in 2003 for being Cecil B DeMille.  Strike two was the SCOTUS smackdown.  This, if there is ANY justice in Alabama, should be his third and last strike and he can permanently grab some non-judicial bench.  He should be out of the judging business for good; so now he can sit by the phone all day, waiting for Trump to appoint him to the Supreme Court.

Bless his heart.

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0 Comments to “Strike Three: Grab Some NOT Bench”


  1. Fred Farklestone says:

    What a shame that his men didn’t succeed in fragging him, while he was in Vietnam!

    “With the Vietnam War underway, Moore first served in several posts as a military police officer, including Fort Benning, Georgia, and Illesheim, Germany before being sent to South Vietnam. Serving as company commander of his MP unit, Moore was known to be very strict. Some of the soldiers gave him the derogatory nickname, “Captain America,” because of his attitude toward discipline. His role earned him several enemies, and in his autobiography he recalls sleeping on sandbags to avoid a grenade or bomb being tossed under his cot, as many had threatened fragging the commander.”

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roy_Moore#Education_and_military_service

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  2. maryelle says:

    Speaking of judges, Federal Judge Gonzalo Curiel, has just ruled that Drumpf must stand trial for fraud regarding the Trump University scam. Judge Curiel just happens to be Latino. How’s that for karma. Looks like taco bowl didn’t do the trick.
    Unfortunately, the trial will not begin until after the election.

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  3. e platypus onion says:

    Ol’ Roy doesn’t recognize the laws of the Unitey States od Obamanation. He recognizes a higher power-himself and his mythical friend gawd.

    He’ll just set up his own Soopremer Court and fry Obama and everyone else in absentia and then ask for thunderbolts to smite them thar heathens.

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  4. Sandridge says:

    What is downright chilling is that if any Rescumlican makes it to the WH, Moore will be rewarded with some high federal judgeship (or other position, should he want it), just for being such a pluperfect R pr!ck his whole damned career.

    “so now he can sit by the phone all day, waiting for Trump to appoint him to the Supreme Court.”

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  5. Both occasions were triggered by complaints fron the Southern Poverty Law Center, my heros.

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  6. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Keep praying for those lightning strikes, Roy. We might get lucky yet.

    Sandridge, in consultation with maggie and Rhea, that’s le plus-que-parfait.

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  7. e platypus onion says:

    To be fair, Drumpf needs to go to trial now. Back when Clinton was being assailed by every lawsuit known to mankind,the Scotus said he wasn’t too pre-occupied not to testify in court. If a sitting Potus has to do it then I imagine the fauxkneeist SOB ever to run for the office can do it.

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  8. This glassbowl is STILL here?

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  9. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Rhea, Roy is a special kind of bowl. He’s a porcelain bowl. As such he deserves a special tribute on a federal highway. Surely there’s a road somewhere in need of a rest stop where we can pay tribute to Roy. Befitting of Roy a rest stop with his name, a porcelain throne as his headstone and a septic tank for his crypt. “Here lies Roy, stop and pay tribute to him.”

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  10. Wow! I know this is a great relief to my family in Aladamnbama for sure! It may be worth traveling down there once more. Can just imagine what his fan club is doing and saying right now. Alors! Also consider that the guv is going down hard big time by his own legislature, of which the Speaker is also in trouble. If this were a horse race, I think they would call this a trifecta!

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  11. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    maggie, behold the New nacilbupeR Party, The Rumps with tRump Drumpf as their leader. In that special trifecta the heads of horses are never entered, but there’s a surplus of horse’s rumps.

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  12. Primo Encarnación says:

    With your permission, PKM?

    The Rump of the Party holds trumps
    But Drumpf has the rest in the dumps
    The Rump Trump Drumpf trifecta
    Won’t pay off, you betcha!
    With their party of surplus horse rumps.

    Are we a team, or what?

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  13. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Primo, as does Ms JJ, you have my express permission without expiration to improve upon any and all comments made my me.

    The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. fields the finest teams!

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  14. majiir says:

    The only reason Moore was allowed to return to the AL Supreme Ct. after being removed in 2003 is because the citizens vote for members of the court. Of course the “conservatives” in the state thought he’d been done wrong and decided to vote him back into office. Having the 10 Commandments displayed on public property doesn’t make people more Christ-like, it’s just a public display of religion and is of no value when officials like Moore, Bentley, and Hubbard reject the Christian values they claim to “love.” And besides, the 10 Commandments are not in the New Testament which is dedicated to the showing the values Christ held dear. Now let me go puke.

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  15. Zyxomma says:

    Vote, vote, votevotevotevotevote. Every primary, every general, every YEAR. It is imperative. VOTE.

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  16. Zyxomma, speaking of votes, Drumpf told West Virginians NOT to vote in their upcoming primary since he now has the nomination sewed up. Instead, Drumpf said, they should save their vote for the general in November.

    This leads me to 3 conclusions:

    1. He thinks they can only vote once per year.
    2. He cares not at all about all the down ticket races on the primary ballot.
    3. Hair Drumpf continues to devolve into a bigger glass bowl every time he opens his face.

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  17. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Debbo, Lady Drumpf says wot?

    Bill Maher gave Donnie Drumpf a big welcome to the game during New Rules.

    http://crooksandliars.com/2016/05/maher-if-trump-was-man-hed-stop-whining

    Yes indeed, with 16 down, you’re “it” Donnie. Enjoy. 😀

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  18. Old Mayfly says:

    For all non-US citizen readers, a bit of commentary:

    Yes. separation of Church and State is written into our Constitution and other founding documents.

    But, some of our Christian-(mostly “fundamentalists”) citizens have been, and still are working hard to bring about a theocracy on their own terms.

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  19. PKM, that was great. I don’t get HBO now so I miss Mr. Maher.

    In addition to Drumpf, and Hair Drumpf, I’m going to add Orangutan Jr. and Whiny Little Bitch. No Lady Drumpf from me. Why would I insult women? I’ll leave the insulting to Orangutan Jr.

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  20. Uncle Igor says:

    A little OT, but the first link in Primo’s post leads to an NBC News article. The headline reads, “Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore Faces Ouster After Gay Marriage Fight,” but the web address in my browser window says, “alabama-chief-justice-roy-moore-faces-ouster-after-gay-marriage-n569771.”

    My, but wouldn’t it be schadenfreudelicious if ol’ Judge Roy got a pantload of e-mails noting that URL and asking if he’s set up his registry at rainbowweddingnetwork.com? (In the immortal words of St Carlin, “These are the thoughts that kept me out of the really good schools.”)

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  21. Linda Phipps says:

    I love your word “jurisprudery”. I grew up in a family that loves Alice In Wonderland, and enjoys novel applications of speech and spelling. That was brillig.

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  22. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Debbo, you raise an interesting point. We both love women and would not want to inadvertently, much less directly insult women. Maher can and does frequently tack misogynist, so I don’t want to follow him down the Lady Drumpf rabbit hole. So, I will table my usage of “Lady Drumpf,” until it can be confirmed that such usage is solely aimed to ‘get under’ Donnie Drumpf’s thin skin, as would be my intent. Or, does it have a wider context? I bow to The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. for guidance. Ladies and gentlemen, your thoughts, please.

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  23. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Happy Mother’s Day to Everyone! Hope your day is extra special Miz JJ and that you had a spectacular cruise knowing that daChipster and Primo would be both giant and gentle guardians to your flock.

    Thanks daChipster and Primo for everything you’ve done to make this week great.

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  24. maggie says:

    PKM, re: equine anatomy – RUMPs are bat blind, can’t see where they are going. Plus they are minus a space for a brain. But then, for some of these, the end with the head is also oddly not equipped.

    Groaning slightly here. As part of my job have been watching watching a talking head show on CBS. The spoke for the American Conservative whatever rehashes RUMP’s gibberish on Bill Clinton and women and throws in something about Hill being an enabler in that. Cannot figure out the latter but the former got a great response from the Democrat at the table when she brought up the fact that Clinton’s impeachment charges were largely based not on political or constitutional bases but private behavior and he was NOT impeached. The House Rethugs shuffled back to their side of the Hill wearing omelets.

    I think I need a dog, or to go outside and just pulls weeds!

    Its going to be a long time to 1.) the convention in Philly and 2.) the general election as RUMP flounders around for attention.

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  25. e platypus onion says:

    If memory serves, Clinton was also disbarred-the first time anyone was disbarred for conduct unrelated to any attorney ethical standards. Wingnuts were being punitive.

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  26. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    maggie and e platypus onion, admittedly I wasn’t around in the Big Dog days. And, obviously I don’t speak for all millennials.

    BUT

    Yeah that other big word. While I can’t name all the fallen House Speakers who were casting stones at the time without consulting google, I do know this: Lyin’ Ryan will pay the price for all that hypocrisy. Some pundits have said that he’s the most powerful of the snacilbupeR. Quite frankly, he gets no respect from my generation. Sad state of affairs when the man 3rd in line is viewed as a punk.

    $carah Palin is out after his hide. I wish her luck. Between now and Cleveland, let the snacilbupeR internecine games begin.

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