July 05, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized
Welcome to The World's Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc.
My name is Susan DuQuesnay Bankston. I live in Richmond, Texas, in the heart of Tom DeLay's old district. It's nuttier than squirrel poop here.
I am honored and privileged to know Miss Juanita Jean Herownself, hairdresser extraordinary and political maven. Since she does not have time to fiddle with this internet stuff, I type her website for her and you can read it if you want to. If you don't, she truly does not give a big bear's butt.
A lot of what I post here has to do with local politics, but you probably have the same folks in your local government.
This ain't a blog. Blogs are way too trendy for me. This is a professional political organization.
Darlin’ they will never manage to ruin your life because you are able to do something they are totally unable to do. They cannot reach down deep inside and pull up a gem of a pun, a scathing denunciation of a politician which is also screamingly funny, or, in a pinch, a factoid so outrageous, but true, that you have us all scurrying to find our torches and pitchforks! You are the QUEEN, not that pathetic cougar from Alaska.
1Patriot? yes. Conservative? No way. Washington was a revolutionary. Yeah, like Jesus. Palin is soooooo stupid. It just drips from her.
2Come on JJ! You know Sarah is thoughtful like that. Why it wasn’t even a month ago when she wished Betsy Ross a happy birthday (June 14).;-)
3Some of the other “traditional” values supported by conservatives over the course of American history have included slavery (remember that the Republican Party was on the liberal fringe in 1860), religious persecution, the subjugation of women and minorities, obstacles to immigration, voter suppression, prohibition and segregation. Conservatives started off on the wrong side of American history, and that’s where they’ve been ever since.
4If it’s conservative to take up arms against the government… wait, some of them do want to do that. Palin’s husband wanted Alaska to secede from the United States, that’s what a great Amurrican he is.
These people confuse the heck out of me. I need to visit JJ’s often for a snootful of sanity.
5The GOP does so many ludicrous things it’s hard to separate fact from fiction.
6It is impossible to satirize Sarah Palin. She is the parody of herself.
7I wonder what she does on February 22nd, on George Washington’s ACTUAL birthday.
8Unfortunately,or not, everyone who tries to do satire these days runs headlong into Poe’s Law
Poe’s Law condensed version: Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won’t mistake for the real thing.
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Poe’s Law slightly expanded version: Similar to Murphy’s Law, Poe’s Law concerns internet debates, particularly regarding religion or politics.
“Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won’t mistake for the real thing.”
In other words, No matter how bizarre, outrageous, or just plain idiotic a parody of a Fundamentalist may seem, there will always be someone who cannot tell that it is a parody, having seen similar REAL ideas from real religious/political Fundamentalists.
9The former Snowdrift Snooki may be the living embodiment of this idea.
What, no Happy Birthday to Calvin Coolidge?
10He’s the only president born on the fourth of July. Of course, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson died on the same 4th of July, but not really a reason to celebrate.
Of course we all know that Palin reads ”all of them” newspapers, political mags and biographies. That’s how she knows soooooo
much.
JJ, you are indeed the Queen, so don’t let the idiots get you down — Sarah may not have actually said it, but it certainly does sound like her.
11Palin wouldn’t know satire if it bit her on the butt, but I bet she’d like it.
12Kudos to the Sarah Palin twitter doppelganger.
13I wish I had someone who could do my job that well on holidays!
Dumb as a box of rocks
14Ok Number one sarah palin is an idiot, nothing but a bomb thrower and clueless twit. Number 2 the 4th of July is not George Washington’s birthday, see number one. Number 3 see number 1.
15Well golly whoppers. Everyone one except Sarah knows it was Yankee Doodle Dandy that was born on the Fourth of July.
Holy Hannah!
16Are you sure? I thought the pony was born July 4th, the one called Macaroni that ran to tell the pilgrims the British were coming to take all their guns, also too /snark
17I’m sure she’d be interested in knowing how George Washington interpreted the 2nd Amendment: he organized a well-ordered militia and used it to put down an armed rebellion of farmers who refused to pay a tax on whiskey. Conservative, yes; Tenther, no.
18Sometimes I see things written in Americanish, but they just don’t make any sense. Then I have a glass of iced tea and I feel better….
I HATE feeling hopeless, but…. Sigh.
19LOL to all of the above and, @Bananas … love it! Snark indeed!
Happy Sunday to all of JJs fans!!
20I miss the days when her stupidity was new & jaw dropping. Now, she’s just a Charlie Brown cartoon adult voice: Whaa whaa whaa whaa whaa.
Her ability to self parody is a wonder.
21I’m always amazed at the idiotic crap that flows from that woman’s mouth!
“Washington was a federalist. Federalists in his time supported the idea of a strong, structured central government. This contrasts with modern conservatives who are more Jeffersonian in thought and practice. They call for a more decentralized federal government with more emphasis on state’s rights.”
“Modern conservatives are not uniformed constitutionalists, they just stick to the constitution when it is in their best interest.”
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Was_George_Washington_a_liberal_or_a_conservative
22I got nothing. Geesh.
23We have better things to do that mock Sarah Palin on this the 2014th birthday of this country.
24Know why Snowgrift Snoozie wasn’t around during the revolution? They didn’t have any Red Bull for her to chug or busses to throw her ex-friends under. If she had been around to give inspirational speeches to the troops,they would have deserted en masse and the Brits would’ve won by default.
25Just watched the full 7-part John Adams HBO series from 2008 yesterday. It was excellent! The “founding fathers” fought about the same things that are fought over today: central government authority versus states rights – and they only had to argue with 13 states! Doesn’t give me much hope that we will ever live peacefully again. The tea partiers were well represented then also, although they were far more intelligent than the ones we see now. Well worth the watch. I may do this again as there was so much information. The actors looked very much like the characters they represented and I must say, Thomas Jefferson was a very handsome man 🙂 His black lover Sally and their children were also mentioned in the story, thus his private life was not so private at all at the time. All in all, an excellent mini-series.
26Despite the best efforts of the former snowdrift Snooki I suppose there is a bit of justice left in this slice of the universe on this past 4th of July Richard Mellon Scaife, the godfather of conservative benefactors and dirty tricks, shuffled off this mortal coil and Ron Kovic celebrated another birthday.
27Actually, AlanInAustin, I believe the U.S.A.is 238 years old today. July4,1776 to July 4, 2014.But who’s counting!
28George Washington: Patriot. Conservative. Slaveholder. Why do they keep forgetting slaveholder?
29@JAK because it’s utterly unimportant to them. I’d be more interested in what they thought of Washington freeing his slaves in his will. Mmm; maybe not. They’d probably say that showed how well the market works.
@Gramiam
I think Alan was trying for satire and we all agree that’s a hard line to hew with the Republicans these days; they are totally into self-parody.
No? They’re serious about this stuff? No!
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