.

Juanita is embarrassed to admit that Ron Paul represents part of Fort Bend County.  She supposes that she should have some respect for a man who sticks to his principles.  However, that same statement could be said of David Koresh.

“When your principles are nuts, then sticking to them could be called hard headed,” she says.  “Ron Paul is so hard headed that you could turn him upside down and use him for a diamond splitter.  His ideas are an odd sort of social Darwinism that is mean, hateful, and downright antidemocratic.  He plays a sweet old confused man to keep himself from sounding like he’s ready to open a Soylent Green factory.”

“But, he’s also crafty son of a motherless goat.  He spent $100,000 toting in people he plans to cook if he becomes President to the CPAC convention so they could vote for him in the CPAC straw poll,” she reports.  “And they feel free to be disruptive because this is the nicest place they’ve ever been outside of the trailer park and Mt. Shiloh Missionary Uptopia Baptist Church  Footwashing Division Southern Conference.”

“Poor ole Delbert and Fannie Lee hear that Ron Paul is against the IRS and, Honey, they are signing on the dotted line and buying themselves a one way ticket to Screwyouville.  They have no idea in what else Ron Paul believes but they know that free tickets mean you have to clap at everything he says.  God love ‘um, they believe in self-reliance except when politicians are giving away freebees, in which case there is such a thing as a free lunch.”

“But,” she continues, “that ain’t the craziest thing that happened at CPAC.  But, this is.

Anti-Sharia activist Pamela Geller says that criticism of her is basically “the second wave of the 9/11 attacks.”

Geller with Gingrich

“For those who fear to tread in Looneyblog, Geller is the woman who called Ayn Rand “the greatest philosopher in human history,” and said that Supreme Court Justice Elena Kagan (who is Jewish) supports Nazi ideology.  Also on her blog you will find that Barack Obama is the lovechild of Malcolm X and that Obama’s mother was involved in pornography.  She’s a real doozy,” Juanita grins.

“Dammit,” she says, “next year we’re gonna go to CPAC.  It’s real obvious from Gingrich’s picture that big hair is very in.”