Bless his heart, Rick Perry is trying to get a pardon from the man who is going to be in prison before he is.

Rick went all Old Testament over Donald Trump this weekend and slobbered some of the most prayerful pile of poop seen anywhere since the last time Rick Perry needed divine intervention to fix some mess he got involved in while trying to play way above his IQ level.

Trump has been described as the “chosen one” by his secretary of energy, Rick Perry.

In the preview of an interview shown on Fox News on Sunday night, the adviser, who has drawn scrutiny for his role in the Ukraine scandal, also compared the US president to a number of biblical kings.

“God’s used imperfect people all through history,” Mr Perry told the broadcaster. “King David wasn’t perfect, Saul wasn’t perfect, Solomon wasn’t perfect.”

Well, yeah, nobody’s perfect but I don’t think any of them paid off a hooker.  And Saul had the good grace to fall on his sword.

Here’s the part you’re gonna love —

He revealed that he gave Mr Trump “a little one-pager on those Old Testament kings about a month ago”.

So now you have to ponder if Perry gave Trump a one-pager because Trump is too dumb to understand anything bigger than that or because that’s all Rick’s crayola would write.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.