Republican Cringe Time

November 06, 2023 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

It just a matter of time before they all do it.  It’s when a Republican doesn’t outrage you, disgust you, scare you, or make you want to punch them in the face. It’s cringe time.  It’s when you gotta stand against wall to keep that feeling from running up and down your spine until you’re doubled over so badly that you have to eat lunch in a dog bowl.  Republicans can do that to you. And, they seem quite proud of it.

Prime example today: Speaker of the House, second in line to the presidency, and grown ass man without a bank account Mike Johnson has a semi-codified hanky panky relationship with his 17 year old son.  They proudly spy on each others use of pornography.

Okay, that’s not normal. And to make it Olympic contender weird, Johnson hisownself announced out loud into a damn microphone that people will be glad to know that his son is completely porn free including but not limited to the Sears Roebuck catalogue.  Okay, so I made up the catalogue part but everything else is true.

Now, wouldn’t it just be easier to buy his 17 year old son a tee shirt that says “I’m Afraid Of My Weiner” and have him wear it to school?  I dunno how y’all do it in foreign states but in Texas if you have a heterosexual 17 year old male who does not want to look at ta-tas, you get nervous.  And if he’s homosexual, topless pictures of Superman on his bedroom wall bring delight to anybody, am I right?

These people just want to get their noses in everyone else’s private business.  They are far more ashamed of their desire for pornography than their willingness to let people be.

That makes me cringe.

 

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0 Comments to “Republican Cringe Time”


  1. I believe there’s even juicier shit to be found about Johnson. It would not surprise me, if he’s really a deep closet gay man with a wife who’s been giving him conversion therapy to make him straight. All this evangelical chest pounding is an exercise to make him feel shameless and omnipotent to the radicals.

    As far as Mike not having a bank account, well he must be someone’s little political pet rock.

    So what’s he going to try to outlaw next? Adult toy stores, battery powered toothbrushes? Porno has been around for thousands of years and it’s not going anywhere.

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  2. I long ago took the stance that I won’t believe somebody is gay unless they tell me they are. (OK, Lindsay Graham is an exception–except one of my neighbors claims that Miss Lindsey propositioned him at National Airport, so there’s that.)

    Plus, my Gaydar doesn’t seem to be particularly sensitive. However, a lot of other people’s seems to be pinging like mad when it nears the Speaker. Just sayin’.

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  3. If our laws should be based on Biblical law as I believe Mike suggests, what chapter has the part about Thou Shalt Not Gaze Upon Photographic & Video Porn?

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  4. Rick @ 3
    Isn’t it funny how the people that want to impose biblical law on others seldom follow it themselves.

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  5. RepubAnon says:

    I smell burner phones with all the porno sites bookmarked.

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  6. @Papa #1

    “So what’s he going to try to outlaw next? Adult toy stores…?

    In 2012, I drove across the USA from Virginia to Berkeley CA on I-80. In 2015, I drove back to Virginia via the Central Valley and then took old 66 as far as I could, then I-40 from OKC to I-81 back to Virginia.

    I NEVER saw SO MANY “ADULT” stores as I did in the Bible Belt! Lordie, I needed brain bleach! There was one at each jug handle on the cloverleaf!

    Blue states? No nudie stores. Red states? ALL OVER!

    Learned me a lesson, there.

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  7. Bob Boland says:

    With respect to the new Speaker, if he and his family don’t have bank accounts, how does he get paid? My understanding is that every US government person has to have direct deposit. And if he is getting a paper check (special privileges, anyone?) where does he cash it? One of those ripoff check cashing stores?
    Can’t you just see him trying to pay his mortgage with $100 bills. Something is fishy, and I don’t mean Capt’n D’s.

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  8. Don’t pick on Him.
    We all know Him and Trump are above the law.
    Just ask them.

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  9. Steve from Beaverton says:

    Mike, yes it is funny how these types often preach one thing and secretly do the opposite. When I first read about this (Jeff Tiedrich had a great piece about it this morning), I was thinking about all the (in)famous self proclaimed religious superheroes that ended up living secret lives which were the opposite of what they preached. I think it’s a defense mechanism they use to pretend they’re so squeaky clean.
    I also think that it’s very fishy he has no assets or bank accounts. Time to check his tax returns. When there’s something as fishy as his reported finances, there’s likely some dead fish around. Where does the gop find this clowns.

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  10. Papa @1 Running conversion clinics seems to be a thing for Dominionists. Former Congresswoman Michele Bachman’s husband Marcus runs a “pray away the gay” clinic in Minnesota. I don’t think that all of his prayers have been answered, but maybe in some perverse way, they have.

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  11. Grandma Ada says:

    I’m suspicious of his “proclamations.” I’ve found that when GOP say they are against something, that is exactly what they are doing. This guy will soon be found lurking around ladies rooms or school buildings.

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  12. Maga Mike may be buttoned up tight to the point that he squeaks, but there’s nothing like forbidden fruit to entice a 17 year old boy. He’s playing papa’s game on the surface, but I’ll bet he’s learning a lot about the seamy side of life when papa isn’t looking. Ol’ Mike probably isn’t that hard to fool either. I think of the Dugger family as exhibit one in wilful ignorance.

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