Because everybody loves a parade, it is shocking that one of our favorite guys couldn’t draw a crowd big enough to move a couch much less a political campaign.

Remember this charming couple, Mark and Patricia McCloskey, who pulled weapons on a Black Lives Matter parade down their street?

Well, he kicked off his campaign for Senate this week on his one year anniversary of keeping the neighborhood safe for privileged white lawyers wearing dirty, tacky clothes.  The newspaper says that tens of people showed up, even with free food and big names draws.

Initially, fellow criminal and proponent of armed coups Michael Flynn was scheduled to speak, but he was subbed out for North Carolina Congressman and notably dumb guy Madison Cawthorn, who also did not show up.

Pillow magnate and unhinged lunatic Mike Lindell piped in a prerecorded message of support, as did war criminal Oliver North, probably as a consolation prize since Flynn was presumably too busy plotting out his own future crimes to make an appearance.

They roasted a whole pig, which was kinda appropriate, but even that would only draw a couple dozen people and a few umbrellas —

McCloskey is joining a crowded race to replace two-term Republican Sen. Roy Blunt (R-Mo.). His competitors in the Republican field include scandal-scarred former Gov. Eric Greitens and state Attorney General Eric Schmitt.

Kinda makes me want to move to Missouri and vote in the Republican primary.