If you’re like me and feeling crappy about Trump’s speech, I have some instant happiness for you.

Louie Gohmert has a serious challenger. Dr. Brent Beal, who teaches business at the University of Texas in Tyler has announced that he’s a Democratic candidate for Gohmert’s seat.

Go give him $10. by clicking the red DONATE button on the upper right hand side.  Who says money can’t buy happiness? Boy, just the thought of Brent chasing Louie all around East Texas makes my heart do the happy dance.

Once you donate, tell others how good it felt in the comments section.

You’re gonna thank me for this.

I have increasingly come to believe that Trump’s only goal as president is to erase every vestige of President Obama’s presence on earth.  All of it.  Everything he ever said or did.

So here comes the Paris Accords.  First, I am confident that whatever he does he will call it winning. Second, it is admirable in a weird way that he’s not doing it on Twitter.  The world needs more covfefe.

Third, I completely understand that he’s using this as leverage, you know like wheeler-dealers do.  He’s thinking, “I’ve got something other countries want. What will they give me in return?”  I seriously doubt that by “me” he means us.  I think he’s holding out for other world leaders to give him a damn golf course somewhere or a hotel on Boardwalk.  I dunno, but I do know he doesn’t give a tinker’s damn about us.

Look, when even the CEO’s of big oil think we should stay in because if everybody dies, there’s no one around to buy their oil, then we need to stay in.

If you’re holding your breath waiting for his announcement, don’t do that.  You may have to hold your breath afterwards.

Remember how President Obama seized Russian “diplomatic” properties in Maryland and New York city claiming they were being “used by Russian personnel for intelligence-related purposes” and he gave them 24 to vacate and get the hell outta Dodge?  They were seized because Russia was interfering in the United States election.

That’s when we had a real President with the real courage to stand up to our enemies.

Enter Trump:

Trump, then at his Mar-a-Lago estate in Florida, appeared to disparage the Obama administration sanctions, telling reporters, “I think we ought to get on with our lives.”

Surprisingly, Russia did not respond. It later emerged that Flynn, in a phone conversation with Kislyak, had advised against retaliation and indicated that U.S. policy would change under the Trump administration.

The Kremlin made clear that the compound issue was at the top of its bilateral agenda. Russia repeatedly denounced what it called the “seizure” of the properties as an illegal violation of diplomatic treaties.

Last week Russia tweeted (which is the only way to get Trump’s attention).

Oooowwwwww … threats.

Oooowwwwww … Trump.

It’s not so much that he’s kissing Putin flat on the mouth, it’s that he does it right in the middle of the street, with a spotlight, camera crew, lasers, and loud music on National Coddling Day and then tweets that it’s all fake news.

I wonder if he’s going to let Jared list it first and then sell it back to them.

There’s a Republican representative in the Texas House who is not the worst Republican in the state house.  Bryon Cook is probably still going to hell, but not as deeply as other Republicans.  Cook does support Dreamers getting in-state college tuition and getting driver’s license.

McNutt: Fruitcake Proud!

So this wild-eyed Tea Party racist guy ran against Cook two years ago in the primary and is running against him again in 2018. Thomas McNutt is the vice-president of Collin Street Bakery, a world famous fruitcake company.  I know, the jokes just write themselves.

McNutt is running on the basis that there’s just too many damn Mexicans in Texas.  This guy hates Mexicans worse than State Rep. Matt Rinaldi.  (Remind me to update you on that story in a minute.)

So in the middle of the last election, it becomes public that McNutt has hired undocumented workers at his Collin Street Bakery, because some of them came forward and talked about it to the press.

McNutt the Hypocrite lost.

So his bakery sues the workers for defamation.  The Quorum Report (subscription only) reports —

We have also learned that the suit was quietly dropped after McNutt’s company fully retreated from the argument that all its employees’ legal status were verified.

He just announced that he’s running again.  His big thing is No Sanctuary Cities.  Corsicana has a population of 24,000 people.  That ain’t even a town, much less a city.  Why do people in small towns have a voice in what the hell someone else does in a big city?  And why does a guy who hires undocumented workers think he has any damn right at all to talk trash about undocumented workers?

Y’all, I hate Republicans.  I do.

Okay, I’ll bring you up to date on Matt Rinaldi.  You know how he said he feared for his life and was under DPS protection?  Well, that’s not selling well in Texas. Thanks to Nick Anderson at the Houston Chronicle.

I’m not a big poll watcher.  Unless, of course, I agree with them and this one I do.

Politico says ….

Forty-three percent of voters want Congress to begin impeachment proceedings, according to a new POLITICO/Morning Consult poll, up from 38 percent last week.

Let me say two words that might change their minds:  Mike Pence.  First, it is creepy the way he always smiles at Trump when Trump is talking crazy crap.

Second, he calls his wife “Mother.”  I do not know if he shouts out that word during sex.  Nor do I want to know.  If you try to tell me, I’m gonna put my fingers in my ears and sing Careless Whispers at the top of my lungs.

Third, he is not allowed to have dinner alone with a woman who is not his wife.  What kind of weirdo is this guy?  Tom Jones?

Fourth, theocracy ain’t a big jump from calling your wife Mother.

Fifth, he does not believe in evolution, Medicare Part D, public schools, or that smoking kills people.  He does, however, believe in tax cuts.  And Citizen’s United, which he said, “Freedom won today in the Supreme Court.”

Sixth, you put and Paul Ryan in the same room and democracy dies a brutal death while pounding on the door to get out.

Seventh, and you thought Trump was bad? Oh hell, he’s just the warm-up act for the antiChrist.

I’m not fond of Mike Pense.  However, to save your from spending all day reading this, I will skip to Eight hundred and twenty second.

Eight hundred and twenty second, while governor of Indiana, he tried to start a state government run daily newspaper distributed all over the state and competing with other newspapers, you know, like Pravda. He even picked an editor for it.

Mike Pence, not my favorite guy.

Stolen with pride from my friend Chris Kelly —