Al Franken just resigned, but this Texas Democrat has stayed in office.

The official White House explanation of Trump’s slurred speech seems a little … well, unfreekingbelieveable.

“His throat was dry. There’s nothing to it,” White House spokesman Raj Shah said when asked to explain why President Trump garbled “God bless the United States” at the end of his remarks on Wednesday recognizing Jerusalem as the capital of Israel and announcing plans to build a U.S. Embassy in the disputed city.

The other explanation was that he’s wearing false teeth.  That could be true because it would fit right in. Fake hair. Fake tan. Fake teeth. Fake neuron synapses.

None of those, however, explain the slurred signature.

Personally, I think maybe he drank that gift from Vladimir Putin. Maybe?

Thanks to Bunny for the heads up.

Virginia Thomas, wife of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, gave an award today to James O’Keefe.

Here ya go —

Virginia Thomas, the wife of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, presented an award to conservative provocateur James O’Keefe on Wednesday for going “above and beyond in the defense of liberty.”

Thomas extended the honor to a handful of other conservative thought leaders as well, including Fox News host Sean Hannity, Turning Point USA CEO Charlie Kirk, and Judicial Watch President Thomas Fitton.

And the event was held at … the Trump Hotel in DeeCee.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Susan Collins got herself in a mess of trouble when she got caught lying about the tax bill.

She told Meet the Press that the tax bill would use growth to offset the tax cut so the national debt wouldn’t explode.

She cited Glenn Hubbard, Larry Lindsey, and Douglas Holtz-Eakin.

Well hell’s bells, somebody called two of them and  –

Jennifer Rubin got ahold of two of the three, Hubbard and Holtz-Eakin. Both economists denied having ever claimed the Republican tax cuts would produce enough growth to recoup the lost revenue.

So Collins headed home to people who praised her for her courageous vote against the health care repeal to face some really pissed off people.  Some met her at the airport and turned their backs to her.  And it’s continuing.

An electrician, a nurse, a senior, and a veteran were arrested at Senator Susan Collins’ Bangor office Monday evening for refusing to leave until the Republican lawmaker promised to pull her support for the GOP “tax scam.”

“We are not trying to cause trouble, we are trying to be heard and represented,” Tina Davidson, a disability rights activist and veteran, said.

So Collins, the last Republican moderate, jumped onboard a sinking ship and is now cuddling to the donor class.

May God have mercy on her soul.

Thanks to SGray for the heads up.

Colorado Republican State Representative Lori Saine is working her way up to be able to put “Pistol Packing Momma” on her campaign literature.

Denver police say Rep. Lori Saine was arrested at the airport Tuesday and was being held for investigation of introducing a firearm into a transportation facility. The case will be presented to the Denver District Attorney’s Office to consider possible charges.

Saine is a big Second Amendment lover and even co-spondored legislation to remove some restrictions on ammo magazines because, you know, it’s a shame to have to stop and reload. And she is also a strong advocate for guns in schools.  So, I suspect Saine was just playing Airport Annie Oakley.

Thanks to Larry for the heads up.

Hold the presses!  Remember that story about Trump’s private intelligence operation?  The ones about his support of pedophile Roy Moore? Trump’s travel ban?  The tax bill that will plunge the economy into recession?  How about nuclear war with North Korea?  None of those are current, so let’s move on to the next big crisis…

TRUMP JUST ANNOUNCED, IN THE FACE OF WORLDWIDE OPPOSITION, TO NAME JERUSALEM AS CAPITAL OF ISRAEL.  He also announced his intention to move the US embassy, touching off a Middle East crisis.

So, upending the US government isn’t enough; threatening nuclear war with North Korea wasn’t enough; NOW, we’re going to start a Middle East war because…it’s Tuesday.