No Shoot, Sherlock
In a move worthy of Colombo, Vanity Fair has finally uncovered the mystery of why Trump did not attend any of the Veterans Day events.
One Republican briefed on the internal discussions said the real reason Trump did not want to go was because there would be no tent to stand under. “He was worried his hair was going to get messed up in the rain,” the source said. “[John] Bolton and everyone was telling him this was a big mistake.” A former administration official said Trump hates being outside in wet conditions.
It was his hair, you damn fools.
Marine One cannot fly in the rain? Oh hell, Marine One can fly through a damn tornado. The Secret Service didn’t want him going in his car because it’s raining and they just finished washing it?
No, he did not go because he knew he would look silly wearing a shower cap.
“No, he did not go because he knew he would look silly wearing a shower cap.”
The TWMDBS is the perfect place to ask: how would a shower cap be any sillier than that dead animal styled to resemble hair that Donnie wears daily?
Having been foiled once and proven too st00pid to furl an umbrella, the Stable Genius smelled a trap. Or, more likely, Donnie had a hot date planned with Vlad.
1Shower cap? No he could/should have worn a Fedora. He would look better in that than almost anything else he wears and not a problem in the rain. He just didn’t want to go enough.
Bigger problem for me is that rank and file U.S. military will STILL vote R because they have been conditioned to believe that only R politicians have their interests at heart and that Ds will take all the money away and spit on the troops.
The programming runs deep.
2Cheatolini understands how bad he would look in the rain. He doesn’t understand the optics of braving the rain to capture the honor of being our nation’s representative to commemorate our war dead. He can’t remember the horrors they underwent to end WWI. He doesn’t get personal sacrifice to the level of looking bad, let alone poison gas attacks and charging machine guns…
3Told you so. If Trump’s hair got wet, his bald spot, which he tries so hard to keep covered up, would be exposed. Malignant narcissism, indeed.
4Could he possibly be actually feeling that he is an old man? And there are more and more things becoming harder to do at all? The tweets are geared to not sound “old man”, or so he thinks, and distract everyone from the growing old feeling.
5He doesn’t mind golfing in the rain. Problem is, you have to take off your hat/MAGA cap in a cemetery. That’s why he couldn’t manage the two-mile drive to Arlington either. If this soldier was so great, why is he unknown? Executive time, policy time, Hannity time, only so many hours in a day. Unfair!
6My hair frizzes in the rain so I get it. But his “hair” is already a tortured orange mat that has been starched and glued to his head in an unnatural way. Time to get rid of the hair, Buddy Roe. The Daddy Warbucks look has a certain charm.
7Geez, Buttermilk, you sound just like him! I almost passed a marshmellow through me nose!
8Alan, don’t give up on the “rank and file” yet. My son has been a GI for a lot of years now and assures me he’s not alone in being progressive. True, the military skews red, but that has a lot to do with where they came from (not a lot of city boys). But the progressives are not alone.
9Buttermilk, I propose that Trump’s loathing of losers had a great deal to do with his neglect of going to Arlington. In his world, hey, unknowns are losers.
10Probably worried of the dye job running and ruining his suit.
11What is the hair equivilant of “raccoon eyes” ( running mascara)
The sad thing is that this was the 100-th anniversary of a vital moment in Western history. There won’t be any do-overs, or “make up for it next year”. A once in a lifetime to at least pretend we’re part of the larger world … but no, some jerk’s hair might get messed up.
Someone should have done to Trump what my aunt did to my mother in another context. “Honey, if you miss this event because of your damned hair, then I swear that just before the coffin lid is sealed on you, I’m gonna lean over and muss up your hair for all eternity!”
On the other hand, Trump probably figures that the world ends when he does, so it’s no problem.
[And no, my aunt did not mess up my mother’s hair after the funeral. She left it for me to do.]
12Psst….Trump could have worn a hat. A nice hat…like a fedora since even he knows his red MAGA hats are a big faux pas in the EU (and everywhere IMO) Unlike all others who wore proper dark attire to honor the dead, he did wear a screaming red tie just to ‘own the libs’. Oh..and…His wife buys hats, she could help him buy one.
13Not to worry, the current president, with that muskrat that lives on his head, looks pretty silly. A bit of moisture won’t dramatically increase the silliness.
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