New Planet Discovered Among Ruins of Sarah Palin’s Knowledge of English
No kidding, y’all, a new planet has been discovered.
No, no, wait. It was just Marco Rubio’s boots being hurled out of Florida.
January 21, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized
No kidding, y’all, a new planet has been discovered.
No, no, wait. It was just Marco Rubio’s boots being hurled out of Florida.
Welcome to The World's Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc.
My name is Susan DuQuesnay Bankston. I live in Richmond, Texas, in the heart of Tom DeLay's old district. It's nuttier than squirrel poop here.
I am honored and privileged to know Miss Juanita Jean Herownself, hairdresser extraordinary and political maven. Since she does not have time to fiddle with this internet stuff, I type her website for her and you can read it if you want to. If you don't, she truly does not give a big bear's butt.
A lot of what I post here has to do with local politics, but you probably have the same folks in your local government.
This ain't a blog. Blogs are way too trendy for me. This is a professional political organization.
” . . . squirmishes . . .”
1I noticed she was wearing the same boots as Marco at her endorsement of Trump. Great minds…yadda yadda.
2Just like Palin’s missing brain, no one yet knows where it’s located.
3Note to Grampy McCain: No, this does NOT let you off the hook for inflicting the Wasilla Wendego on us. It only proves that Donnie T-Rump is a bigger fool than you.
4Republicans need to add this planet to their 2016 Platform, pronto. It would be used to reward large donors, while giving the usual something-for-nothing to the rest of their base:
Upon the election of a Republican president in 2016, a probe named “Reagan” would be built and launched by private Republican contractors to the new planet, which will be named “Jesus.” On successful orbital insertion by “Reagan” the entire planet would be declared Christian, and abortion free.
Good jobs would be guaranteed to former coal miners, steel and textile workers, with spacelines, mining operations, megachurches, as well as food & lodging licensed by Republican executive order to extract the good wages paid to workers into the tax free Off World Bank accounts of Republican licensees.
Oh, and casinos as the only source of entertainment other than megachurches.
5Scientists are calling it “Planet Nine”.
Republicans call it “Home World”.
I always thought they came from someplace else.
6It has NOT been discovered. They’ve found evidence that there is almost certainly one, but this has been in the works for years. This is all about a recent finding that makes it pretty clear that a planet around 10 times the size of earth has been there influencing the orbits of other objects beyond Neptune. They have a loose idea about where to look for it, but no sightings of it yet.
Science reporting has become problematic lately. There’s way too much hype and too many claims of certainty. Scientists say ‘maybe’, reporters say ‘yeah, baby, they got it!’.
7Vets are having backlashes with Snowgrift Snoozie blaming Obama for her son’s ptsd-since it was dumbass dubya who created this mess and the Grifter’s kid served in 2008 before the Masterful Obama was elected.
8epo: PTSD? Okay. Who diagnosed him? Where? When? If Palin’s using that as an excuse for her son’s behavior and a way to bash Obama… THAT is just wrong. She belittles all those really suffering from it. Bitch.
9Trevor Noah: The Only Thing Palin Hates More Than Obama Is Punctuation
http://crooksandliars.com/cltv/2016/01/trevor-noah-only-thing-palin-hates
Trevor had the same reaction as many of us did to $carah’s “hand that rocks the cradle” line.
10“Squirmish” is my favorite thing to come out of that… speech.
My definition for it is “an uncomfortable confrontation”. Reminding your octogenarian mother to use condoms with her new boyfriend would be a squirmish.
11JAKVirginia-here is part of Palin’s Tulsa speech. Go to Wonkette for more.
But my son, like so many others, they come back a bit different, they come back hardened, they come back wondering if there is that respect for what it is that their fellow soldiers and airmen and every other member of the military, so sacrificially have given to this country, and that starts from the top, it’s a shame that our military personnel even have to wonder, if they have to question if they’re respected anymore. It starts from the top, the question, though, that comes from our own president, where they have to look at him and wonder: do you know what we go through, do you know what we’re trying to do to secure America and to secure the freedoms that have been bequeathed us!
We don’t disagree. It’s a hell of shame when the commander in chief shows an obvious lack of respect for the troops who’ve gone off to fight in his war, like Track Palin did, when he deployed to Iraq in September 2008, under President George W. Bush. But do go on, Ms. Palin:
Read more at http://wonkette.com/598047/sarah-palin-its-obamas-fault-my-drunk-son-punched-his-girlfriend-for-america#lx6BfIlb5t56R2zR.99
12After watching Sarah’s speech, bless her heart, I have to say I gave some grudging respect to Trump for standing up there next to her and letting her run on and on.
13So my 2004 Honda’s starter quit. Cost gobs of money to fix, as all Honda repairs do. Must be Obama’s fault.
And I banged a weight down real hard and hurt my left shoulder at the gym. My personal trainer said my form on that lift was disgraceful. Must be Obama’s fault.
My dress shoes which are 15 years old and which I wear once in a blue moon have developed a hole. Must be Obama’s fault.
Gawd I am sick of whining a$$ snacilbupeR.
Track grow a pair and up. Quit running to momma every time life isn’t f’ing perfect. You probably haven’t got ptsd. You’re probably just a garden variety selfish prick that can’t hold alcohol.
14Actually, the Tinfoil community has been predicting the return of Planet X, i.e. Nirbiru for ages. Has to do with the Annunaki, our original alien masters, just checking up to see how screwed up we’ve become. Would certainly explain the Republican party.
Supposed to set of a cataclysm here on Earth. Might even prove old Zechariah Sitchin right.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nibiru_cataclysm
15A planet ten times the size of Earth?
Can we name it “Trump’s Ego” ??
16And it would take forever just to make one rotation? If that’s the case, how could it possibly support life as we know it? Human metabolism is synced to the rotation of the Earth, the length of days and nights and all that.
17Gotta love the headline from ‘The Mudflats’
18Half term Gov endorses half wit for president!
Not “Trump’s Ego”, please. There’s no reason to hate an innocent planet.
19Apparently, Palin has been noticibly absent from several campaign stops in Iowa. She was to have accompanied Trump on the stump, but….crickets. Did she get the boot already?Oh please God.
20Sorry, noticeably previously misspelled.
21Trans-Neptunian heavenly bodies? That reminds me: isn’t it about time for the swimsuit edition?
I love how the guy who killed Pluto is now introducing its replacement. “Sorry about that Pluto thing. But, seriously, guys, THIS one is a REAL planet.”
I understand the temptation to name a way-out-there massive gas giant for Trump. But, really, doesn’t “Vulcan” seem a logical choice?
22Tease ’em daChipster and name it Vulvan and see if wingnuts catch it and their heads explode.
23Maryelle, the story behind the story: she was told to dress conservatively so she would not distract from Trump so she agreed to wear black. Well, that black outfit was loaded on top with silver whatsits which reflected stage lighting and distracted from the glorious aura of Trump. She didn’t show at the other events because she wasn’t “asked”.
24lieutenant onion, lay in a trajectory for a Vulvan orbit insertion
25It’s time to get away from naming planets after mythical figures. Let’s go with coined words, like “Freezurassov” or “Tucoolfermi”.
26Captain daChipster. I is afraid to see what Spock’s ears look like now.
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