Lysistrata Lives!
Rumor has it that the rumors about Ted Cruz cannot possibly be true because there are not five women in America who would do the sparkin’ thing with him or, and this can be proven, if he’s even in the same room.
It’s my theory that the only reason Donald Trump gets laid is because … do I need to finish that sentence? No, I do not.
But Trump’s luck runs out in the lady department when it comes to other men. Team Trump is simple not rich enough to buy super-models. Hell, they are barely rich enough for a Big Mac. And their luck with women is fixing to run out.
The “Vote Trump, Get Dumped” movement invites women opposed to Trump to “Join us by wielding your influence.”
“Until Trump is defeated, we don’t date, sleep with, or canoodle with Trump supporters,” a manifesto on its website reads.
Team Trump: where men are men and sheep are scared.
Thanks to Craig for the heads up.
Let me the first to say I promise not to sleep with any man,woman or beast that votes for either wingnut candidate. I have no plans to sleep with any women that vote for the Dem,but that is another story for another day.
1Variation on the argument between the imbecile and idiot as to who is more st00pid. The Loathsome Ted Crooze and Donnie Drumpf arguing about which of those two short fingered vulgarians couldn’t get laid at a whorehouse on payday. About the same odds as either of them becoming president.
2I can’t think of any snacilbupeR supporter I’d be interested in sleeping with. Ickeeee.
3As someone else said earlier of the GOP candidates– Mama, look away– “I wouldn’t f*** any of them with someone else’s v****a.”
Someone in Colorado advertised an apartment for rent, but not to a Trump supporter. “I don’t want anybody who thinks that Trump is qualified to be president living in my house.” He was, of course, immediately inundated with hate mail, which helps to prove his point.
Is this the best the GOP can do, after all these months and years of campaigning– two loathsome frat boys comparing d***s? Really? It’s making the entire country into an international joke and a disgrace.
4I’m not sure this will work. Noticing how angry the typical male Drumpf supporter was, I’d have bet he wasn’t gettin’ any anyways for any number of other valid reasons. His support of Drumpf just seems pretty insignificant after his support for fascism, woman-hate, racism, and ultranationalism. None of these supports strike me as very desirable by the few youngish women I know.
5In case you are curious,it was wingnut racist Strom Thurmond that started the no nominations in the final 6 months of a lame duck Potus term. Back in 1968. Wingnuts blame Biden. Thurmond did it years earlier against LBJ.
6If you want some fun, pop over to the Twitter machine and look at the entries in the humor contest for #TrumpTributeBands
My faves so far:
The Notorious B.I.G.O.T.
7Hairosmith
Bare Naked First Lady
New KKKids On The Block
Wrong Direction
Little Hands
Hateful Dead
Bachman-Turner CombOverdrive
If you are rich, you can get the best looking women that money can buy.
8… still trying to figure out what “canoodle” means in this context :/
9Trump groupies, in fact the whole RWNJ have the perfect birth control. Their personalities!
10When I read this, I began worrying for the safety of anyone who changed her avatar to a picture of crossed fingers. Then I remembered: Trump supporters need to be gathered in large groups before they share the guts to shove, beat up, urinate on or even verbally threaten those who disagree with them. Cowards all.
Meanwhile, the creative genius of the folks who oppose Hair Drumpf and Teddy Boy never fails to amaze.
11I’m surprised the Red States haven’t outlawed Trump and Cruz television appearances since they provide excellent means of birth control.
12two crows, Trumpets can threaten anybody over the web, because they do it the way all cowardly nasty little brats do it: at great distance and anonymously.
LynnN, do you mean birth control because nobody would want to have sex with their supporters, or because the candidates cause so much nausea and dry heaving that nobody who watches them could have sex with anybody?
13Lysistrata reborn.
14So some women say they are not going to date jerks.
Frankly, women rarely follow through on that goal.
Also: Even if Trump loses either the nomination or the general, his supporters will still be jerks.
15If Trump loses either the nomination or election, HIS base will raise a stink from Pasadena to White Plains.
16The truth about Lyin’ Ted – it’s worse than that!
https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/compost/wp/2016/03/25/more-convincing-ted-cruz-sex-scandals-than-the-one-in-the-national-enquirer/
17Umpty-you are killing me with humor. Please! Don’t! Stop!!!
18Please don’t stop. 🙂
Rhea, I meant the second. Both work to some extent, but sadly there are a few female supporters of Trump. Not sure about Cruz.
19@EPO You sound like the sadist and masochist who fell in love and got married. On their wedding night, the masochist begged, “Blindfold me! Bind me! Whip me! Make me cry out in pain such as I have never cried before!”
And with a ghost of a smile, the sadist responded … “No.”
20Ouch! Yup!
21For all that I was bitterly disappointed by the 2014 election here in Texas, I still occasionally think Wendy Davis would have done much better if the young women of Texas had told their husbands and significant others to either show proof that they voted, or be prepared for a long, long stretch without whoopee.
On the other hand, I worry that the majority of young Texas women are about as apathetic and politically listless as their male counterparts, despite the hammering their healthcare is getting from the Republicans.
22@Mister Lee – I’m not a fan of extortion, sexual or otherwise. Besides, Cruz supporters have lots of experience playing with themselves, so locking them out of the bedroom won’t matter much.
23Not to mention the defiling of barnyard animals.
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