Louie’s Butt Meets the Door
I know most of you are going to miss Louie Gohmert. In case you were distracted, Louie left his congressional seat to run for Texas Attorney General against Texas felony indicted Attorney General Ken Paxton.
Out of four candidates, Louie came in fifth. Okay, okay, almost fifth.
I don’t know diddle-squat about the new guy who will surely win that seat except that he admires Gohmert. That could mean that we move from dumb to big dumb. Our fear is that he’s just like Gohmert except effective.
You see, over Louie’s time in congress, he didn’t have a sterling record in effectiveness.
He exits office as Texas’ ninth most senior member of Congress, having made a mark — but not legislatively. In nine congressional terms, he’s passed just one bill into law, a measure in 2017 that simplified the process for calling 911.
We are worried that the new guy can get something passed. As far as we know so far, he may not cast a reflection in a mirror.
I have weird soft feelings for Louie. . . . .
My late mother used to laugh hysterically every time
his name was mentioned. She always said he was dumber
than a bag of hair.
I miss her laughing at Louie.
1I’m gonna miss Louie. He was such an innovative guy. Who would have ever thought that anyone could actually yell “you lie” at a president during a SOTU address?
2“he’s passed just one bill into law, a measure in 2017 that simplified the process for calling 911.”
I like to imagine Louie’s eureka! moment. He’s at a telephone, struggles to dial 911, and says to himself, I can do something about that! And calls a staff member to get on it.
3For the record, it wasn’t Louie who heckled Obama although he probably wished he’d thought of it first:
Joe Wilson (American politician)
4For the record, Louie never thought of anything first.
5Oops, there I go again.
6That’s okay, Half Empty, your mistake and the comments correcting it were good for a chuckle. That’s one of the reasons we love it here…right?
7Louie has expanded the definition of political stupidity – the only Republican congressman from Texas to depart that Temple of Kleptocracy poorer than when he went in.
8Yes, Addison Graves “Joe” Wilson. His other distinction is being named after three autoimmune diseases.
9Louie got too much attetion, Des Jarlais too little.
10I’m going to miss Louie.
With him out of Congress, Arizona will have the craziest member of the House in the person of Paul Gosar.
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