If They Are Just Gonna Watch, Why Don’t We Send Them To The Movies?
I have an idea. And it’s just as good as Rick Perry’s idea to send the Texas National Guard to the border.
Perry admitted yesterday that the troops won’t be able to do anything but watch.
Most of the 1,000 National Guard troops headed to the Texas-Mexico border will take up observational positions and detain people only if they interfere with their mission, a top general over the deployment said Tuesday.
And their mission appears to be “watch.”
Y’all, we don’t even think their weapons are loaded.
Nichols said troops will be armed for their safety, but when asked if their weapons would be loaded would say only that ammunition would be in magazines.
“That’s about as far as I want to go because if the cartel folks understand what we can and can’t do then they may take advantage of that,” Nichols told The Associated Press.
Look, this is Texas. If their weapons were loaded, General Nichols would have answered, “Hell, yes!”
So, the Texas National Guard will simply provide another 1,000 places where refugee children can turn themselves in. You can walk right in front of them with a ton of cocaine and they can’t do diddle squat unless you try to keep them from watching. I don’t even think they can make a citizen’s arrest. Hellfire, they can’t even spit on you.
So, here’s my idea about how we can save some big money. Send the Texas National Guard to the movies. They can “watch” there. Or be a real sport and give them a Netflix subscription. That’s just $8 per month. So, I mean right there you’re saving $11,992,000 a month on your watching budget.
Or, in the alternative, let them stay at home where they can carry a loaded weapon and they can watch the gigantic goofy governor on the teevee, where he lives now.
This jackwagon is even on the front page of the Washington Post today. He must be wetting his pants from the thrill.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/seeking-redemption-in-2016-rick-perry-finds-power-in-immigration-standoff/2014/07/21/243f7c48-10dc-11e4-98ee-daea85133bc9_story.html
1As to the ammo question, these troops will only be equipped to fire blanks. Just like their governor.
2Rick is going to save us from the hungry children, just like Reagan saved us from the promiscuous medical students on Granada, and Peter Piper taught how to pick a peck of pickled peppers.
It’s the definitive definition of small government. That is, a government dedicated to entertaining me, my relatives, and my pay-to-play friends using YOUR money (and preferably YOUR free labor).
3Thanks, Rhea. So much for Clear Lake, Iowa. For his next “non-campaign” stop in the state, he’s going to visit the town of Spencer and lay a wreath at the grave of Dewey the Library Cat.
4Remember, you heard it here first.
5Maybe the National Guard could watch this, as Rick Perry keeps the state’s butane lighter from being purloined by the rabbis, by stcking it down his pants. (Watch at 3:54, if you dare.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsHCgCfLe_I
6Perry’s Warriors will save America from the unarmed brown-skinned children threatening our southern border!
7Maybe Perry can use his influrence to score enough discounted tickets to theme parks for the entire Texas National Guard. Riding the rides has to beat just watching something.
8“if the cartel folks understand what we can and can’t do then they may take advantage of that”
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The hungry, scared little tots are members of the cartels?
Dewey died???? WTH!! Don’t want Perry near Spencer. Too close to me. I can get the exact same “huh” by kicking a hog in the arse as you can get asking Perry a question. Send him to Tysons in Storm Lake,iowa. They are full of brown skinned workers who will make his life enjoyable.
10I’m beginning to understand Perry’s position against legalizing marijuana; he’s already got more stoned-out ideas than any 6 people I knew when I was in college.
11Just so Loopy Louie, the man who set the bar on st00pid doesn’t feel neglected, will credit him for the low bar of st00pid under which pRick Perry is now slithering.
What part of processing the numbers of asylum applications requires more staffing doesn’t he get? A brigade of file clerks and immigration judges is needed, not rifle teams.
12I can hardly wait to see what the Feds do when Perry sends them the bill for this, as I understand he plans to.
13PKM, Perry don’t WANT them kids to be processed.
14So he wants the US to pay for his brainless, useless, pandering grandstanding? Sounds like a previous Texas governor/president.
15Marge Wood, what most of the Teabaggers and pRick “want” is a good summary of how they waste our money and violate our laws and international law.
Too bad we can’t fine them and have them pay out of their campaign coffers for their massive screw ups. We could begin with tapping Ted Cruz for his share of his +24 billion dollar government shut down. They claim to be for personal responsibility and accountability. Let’s give it to them.
16I’ll bet Perry doesn’t know why the liberry cat’s name is Dewey!
Maybe the Tyson’s gang could give him a grand tour of the plant: hang him by his heels and off he’d go flapping and squawking w the rest of the pullets! I vote for that sort of processing for Guv Perry!
17A long time ago, a movie called “Being There”, a character played by Peter Sellers: “I like to watch”. 😉
18aggieland liz-this Tyson’s plant kills hogs and their imported workers are notorious for carrying and using knives at the drop of a hat,preferably Perry’s. Local paper carries lots of domestic violence stories that include knives.
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