I Just Can’t …

April 23, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, there is a woman in Indiana who is convinced that Jesus is inside her uterus.  She has photographic proof.

 

Screen Shot 2016-04-23 at 9.00.10 AM

 

According to Meyer, she didn’t notice the holy apparition until a friend pointed it out when she showed it off at her baby shower.

“She said, ‘Do you see this, it looks like Jesus,” Meyer recalled.

Meyer said, after blowing up the picture, more details became apparent.

“You can see the hair and his legs crossed and everything,” said Meyer.

Had this woman lived in Texas, her ultrasound would have shown Republican members of the State Legislature inside her uterus, where they have been trying to get for several years now.

It would look something like this one —

 

Screen Shot 2016-04-23 at 9.06.04 AM

 

Thanks to Bryan for the heads up.

Be social and share!

0 Comments to “I Just Can’t …”


  1. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Can’t wait for Aley’s parthenogenesis sequel, SODDI.

    1
  2. amazing what a little bit of photoshop’ll do for ya. Looks more like yeebus every time I see that.

    2
  3. e platypus onion says:

    Looks more like ship’s captain lashed to the main mast getting sucked into a whirlpool.

    Who is the good looking one on the bottom? Yo-duh?

    3
  4. e platypus onion says:

    Someone tell Indiana’s goobernor she is planning to abort baby jeebus and watch heads explode.

    4
  5. Coprolite says:

    Damn, that wood crucifix in her uterus must be really painful. I wonder how they got it in there….kind of like those little wood ships they put in a bottle.

    5
  6. W. C. (Pete) Peterson says:

    Jesus is an IUD? Makes sense to me but, then, I don’t have one.

    6
  7. Why Jesus? Why not someone else who was crucified, like Barabbas?

    7
  8. Amazing how stupid sheeple will buy into anything!!!
    But illusions are always fun!!

    8
  9. The phenomenon is called Pareidolia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareidolia

    9
  10. You guys are really funny!

    10
  11. Pareidolia: foundation of nearly every conspiracy theory– seeing what ain’t there.

    11
  12. e platypus onion says:

    OT-how’s this for funny. My gas gauge gas pump sez my gas tank is on the right side of my Jeep, but it is actually on the left rear. My whole life is ruined.

    12
  13. I don’t know.
    If I had crucified Dear Lord Baby Jesus in my uterus, I think I’d keep a low profile. I would at least wait until after the birth to see what direction this thing is going to take.

    There are people, 2000 years after the fact, who still blame the entire Jewish community for crucifying Jesus the first time.

    13
  14. Aggieland Liz says:

    I cant remember any scripture that says “blessed are the stupid” or “blessed are the gullible”- however, there is one that says “thou shalt not lie” and there’s another that prescribes dire punishment “to one who leads astray one if these little ones.” I think stupid people and people who prefer magic to science probably qualify as little ones. And Rhea-bunches of these folks would benefit from having you as a Sunday school teacher, because YOU can read, and I have very grave doubts about their reading comprehension skills

    14
  15. Just another reason for Conservatives to worship someone else’s uterus.

    15
  16. Indiana Pearl says:

    Those Hoosiers! They’ll believe anything!

    16
  17. Aggieland Liz, I’m not sure the problem is their comprehension so much as it is their allergy to reading anything not in pulp magazines.

    17
  18. I live in Indiana and the radio in my car switches to a Christian radio station every time the outside temperature drops below freezing. I think there’s something in the air here.

    18
  19. I for one am thankful she is not a Pastafarian, just think what she might have found in there.

    19
  20. Wyatt Earl says:

    Gotta be a fake. Ain’t no virgins in Indiana.

    20
  21. Amanda Matthews says:

    Hey! What about that partial face leering out right above the top of the crucifix? Who is THAT? There’s an eyebtow, an eye and part of a mouth. What all has that woman got up in there.

    There’s a Hollywood script in here for sure. Anyone want to collaborate?

    21
  22. Amanda Matthews says:

    The above should have said ‘eyebrow’ not ‘eyebtow’. Obviously.

    22
  23. And there appears to be a fat mummy on the left. Just a regular archeology site she’s got in there.

    23
  24. Also, too, it appears the baby got lost in all of this.

    24
  25. maryelle says:

    One thing’s for sure, she’s going to have a Caesarean.

    25
  26. buskyandme says:

    I had oak cabinets in Dallas. During a wine tasting party, a guest came out of the bathroom an announced that Bambi was on our bathroom cabinet. It was! Then came the big search for other things depicted on the cabinets. We found Skirk’s “The Scream”, a cat, and then the ultimate: Jesus! If you have oak cabinets search! Jesus or Bambi could be in your house too!

    26
  27. Sam in San Antonio says:

    She probable inhaled one of Kenneth Copeland’s spores. Where does she keep her pod?

    27
  28. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Wyatt Earl, I must rise to the defense of the virgins of Indiana. It can’t be easy for the ugly six year old who can outrun her brothers. And we wondered why Indiana’s NBA team is called the Pacers …

    As for the ultra sound that began this discussion, what we are seeing is the accumulated debris left behind by the amateur government gynecologists and their pervangelist cohorts. Look center and slightly upward. That darker area is clearly the outline of Mike Pence’s footprint.

    28
  29. Oh – wait for it – Jesus…

    29
  30. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Old Mayfly deserves proper credit for coining “amateur government gynecologist.”

    30
  31. e platypus onion says:

    I always heard jeebus was coming back (as an adult) and he would be pissed. That pic looks (from a sideways angle) like a bone crunching,mechanical broadhead in a deer’s chest cavity between the lungs or kidneys.

    31
  32. I go away for just a couple of days to behold the true genius of my grandboy and Jesus makes an appearance in an Indiana uterus? Who knew? Enquiring minds want to know: will Jesus appear in a Texas uterus? Does Jesus only appear in Christian uteri or will he also appear in a Jewish or Muslim uterus as well??

    32
  33. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Micr, I don’t think Ksuchasheis goy ‘splained this clearly. Christ was a Jew which would mean that his mother Mary was a Jew. Ergo, a Jewish uterus is required, riiiiiiiiiiiight John?

    33
  34. @PKM

    OMG You be so right. What was I thinking????

    Have other Jesus in vitro sightings been reported?

    34
  35. Saw a response on another site from a veteran ultrasound technician. She says this is common, nothing to get excited about, it is just the way the excess space is seen on screen.

    I’ll go with that.

    35
  36. Lunargent says:

    Wasn’t there a scene like this in “The Exorcist”?

    36
  37. Linda Phipps says:

    Just imagine how much it will hurt birthing a cross. None of the shower gifts will fit either.

    37
  38. Marge Wood says:

    Oh my goodness. I thought it was a ballerina. whatever it is, the birthing will be well attended.

    38