How Gays Causes Terrorism

October 23, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

In only lasts a minute.  You can stand anything for a minute.

 

Numero Uno:  Louie knows way too much about Greeks and massages.

Numero Two-o:  Holy mother of god on an olive.  Where did that come from?

 

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0 Comments to “How Gays Causes Terrorism”


  1. Wondered if you were going to post that. It’s waaay out there, even for Louie.

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  2. Where did that come from? Why, out of the top of Louie’s pointed little head! That’s where!

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  3. Where did that come from? Why, out of the top of Louie’s pointed little head, that’s where!

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  4. @JJ:
    99.44% of the time I agree wich you. But a minute, 60 seconds, of my life that I can’t ever get back listening to the Tyler loonie? ewwwwwwwwwwwwww

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  5. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Poor Loopy Louie; apparently he feels his machismo (yeah I threw up a little in my mouth typing that), asparagus with spittle wacky sauce, and his position as dumbest Congress Varmint ever are threatened by the Iowa Castration Critter. He’s throwing down on st00pid and crazy. He double dog dares Joni to make a move on his asparagus.

    Dinner with Louie and Joni might beat Thanksgiving with the Cheney family this year.

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  6. Whatchabet he thinks it’s “gorilla” fighting?

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  7. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Micr, buck up good buddy! Remember Lacy J Dalton when, have a triple Wild Turkey and enjoy.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsUnLCi-jKQ

    Love those innertubes with videos available before I was born and nearly as old as the stuff Mitch McConnell drinks.

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  8. Craig Waters says:

    Dear Miss Juanita,
    I grew up near a military base, and I can tell you. Our service men get lots of massages, based on the number of massage parlors in the community.

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  9. Those gays in the military, sitting around getting their massages all day long while the real, hot-blooded Heterosexuals do all of the fighting … who knew?

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  10. Glen Maxey says:

    I so love learning about what us gay folks do from these freaks.

    I go into battle every day of my life fighting a war against heterosexist nuts.

    But somewhere I didn’t get the gay memo on the massages. Damn fools who recruited me into this war forgot to give me that factoid.

    Starting tomorrow, I’ll be looking for a massage to start my day.

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  11. What in the name of God do massages have to do with active military duty…or terrorism? As usual his spew is totally insane and out of touch with reality. He’s overdue for his lobotomy reversal.

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  12. Uh.

    When can I schedule my next “massage.”

    (At my age, I can’t afford to pass up _any_ opportunity.)

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  13. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Glen Maxey, slow down Big Guy! Once again the voyeuristic KKKRistian crowd has mixed up the message with the massage and totally fallen off the dock of “’tis better to give then receive.” Whether hetero or homosexual, any good partner knows the benefits of giving.

    BTW, did you get your toaster oven on recruitment day, or is that just for lesbians? Pardon my ignorance. But just when my sister-in-law and her wife & lesbian friends get me straightened out on the etiquette, goobers like Gohmert fog up the factoids and bury the facts Chernobyl deep.

    And, about that Graham chicken hawk dude from South Carolina. It strikes me as insensitive to refer to him as Ms or Mrs McCain. I really do not care if he is gay or straight; that is none of my business. I care more about offending real people by bagging on Lindsey with cheap humor that can obviously be offensive to many. Maybe just call him an airhead chicken hawk or the senile twin to the Arizona chicken hawk?

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  14. DaddyWasATexan says:

    There’s some discussion whether Ducky Boy Farenthold will replace Shelly Bachmann as Queen of the Crazy for the Republican House. Louie is in no danger of losing his position as Emperor for Life (tip o’ the hat to Charlie Pierce at Esquire).

    As for the esteemed Senator Graham, “Miss Lindsey” is the most correct form as he remains a “confirmed” bachelor.

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  15. Louie spends waaay too much time thinking about those gay soldiers giving each other massages.

    And he knows as much about history as I know about the operating instructions for the supercollider that found the Higgs boson.

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  16. e platypus onion says:

    djw-more likely bonobo fighting. They are the primates noted for being quadrasexual-they will do anything with any other bonobo for a quarter(or less). Young,old,male,female- doesn’t matter.

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  17. It was hilarious! What a maroon that doofus is.

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  18. Tell us more about the massages with which you are familiar, Mr. Gohmert. And the fighting?

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  19. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    DaddyWasATexan, “esteemed” is certainly a stretch among the possible labels for the chicken hawk from South Carolina.

    It’s very well possible that he is an asexual ammosexual. But if he does fall out of the closet, that’s all on the GOP and has squat to do with anyone in the LBGT community and their many friends & family.

    That he is a determined chicken hawk doesn’t necessarily make him a miss. Could be that even Republican women have standards, thus his exile into perpetual bachelorhood.

    FWIW, from Wiki: “his parents, Millie and Florence James “F.J.” Graham, ran a restaurant-bar-pool hall-liquor store, the Sanitary Cafe.” Will leave all that to the APA to decipher.

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  20. Forget the Greek history. He doesn’t know MODERN history. He doesn’t know that gays are in the military right this very minute and they’re not massaging away all day. They were in the military during ‘Nam. And before that. And oddly enough, they weren’t lounging around giving and receiving massages and failing in their duty.

    Stupid Louie-louise…wait, that was a mistake, I meant to type Louie-louie.

    E.

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  21. Mah Fellow Murkuhn says:

    Well, that’s a minute of my life I’ll never get back.

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  22. Geez, JJ, I know you’ve said over and over how crazy Louie is, but this! THIS!! Ye gods. Isn’t there somewhere y’all in Texas can quietly abduct him and tuck him away so he doesn’t hurt anybody?

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  23. Geez, JJ, I know you’ve said over and over how crazy Louie is, but this! THIS!! Ye gods. Isn’t there somewhere y’all in Texas can quietly abduct him and tuck him away so he doesn’t hurt anybody?

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  24. not stupid says:

    Loue was elected by the people who if they did not know him should never vote Or!!!!!!!!!!!

    THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY “THOMAS COOK VACATIONS” FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:

    1. “I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts.”

    2. “It’s lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallarta to close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during ‘siesta’ time — this should be banned.”

    3. “On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don’t like spicy food.”

    4. “We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price.”

    5. “The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room.”

    6. “We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow.”

    7. “They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax.”

    8. “No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared.”

    9. “Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers.”

    10. “We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish.”

    11. “The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun.”

    12. “It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair.”

    13. “I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends’ three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller.”

    14. “The brochure stated: ‘No hairdressers at the resort.’ We’re trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service.”

    15. “When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners.”

    16. “We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning.”
    17. “It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel.”
    18. “I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes.”
    19. “My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked.”

    BE AWARE …. THEY WALK AMONG US … and THEY VOTE!!!

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  25. Jackie Sue says:

    What!! Is Louie casting aspersions on gay asparagus? That’s bad enough, but to asperze on hard working masseurs is just too much. Sexist, too; notice he gives the masseuses a pass. Don’t be a hater, Louie. Try a massage, you’ll feel better.

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  26. Have you guys been forgetting to water Louie again?

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  27. Paco Fuerte says:

    Idiots who think they are intelligent are frightening.

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  28. @PKM:
    With respect to Austin Nichols’ fine product, there is always a reason to sip the bird. Some reasons are good, some reasons are bad. And sometimes, there’s no reason at all.

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  29. He knows his history…

    I guess he missed the part about the shade the Spartans waited in being from Persian arrows.

    But, I guess invariably, these commenters aren’t people that have served in the military. When a person that has actually served under fire renders judgement of their peers, then I’ll listen.

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  30. I’m trying to imagine Louie Gohmert wearing a tin foil hat. Yes, that would be a good look for Louie.

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  31. Nope.

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  32. Martha Dolese says:

    Nope, couldn’t do it…27 seconds, and I had to stop. That stupid is going to burn all day long.

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  33. That pore boy, he dun gone so far into CrazyLand he cain’t git back.

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  34. Marcia in CO says:

    Poor Loopy Louie … I wonder if his wife is totally as stupid and ignorant as he is … and their 3 children … I wonder if they snicker behind his back!

    Jesus H. Christ … Louie’s ignorance that he spews so blissfully from his pie hole is simply mind-boggling!!

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  35. not stupid, that’s a great collection of stupid remarks, but I think those are from British tourists, not Texans. Just shows that ignorance can be found anywhere.

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  36. Corinne Sabo says:

    When I went to Russia, there were people like these in my tour group. No wonder Ugly American is the rule, not the exception.

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  37. yellowdogintexas says:

    On a tour in Spain; bus stopped for a rest break and we went up to get a couple of bottles of water. Some Brits were on the bus with us and wife came up to husband and said “How is the water?” He made a sour face and said “Cold” We about cracked up, especially since as True Southern Americans we wanted our water COLD

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  38. @not stupid: Thanks for that collection of British tourists’ complaints.

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  39. doquijoterocket says:

    Corrine- You need to read Mark Twain’s Innocents Abroad. This is not a new or recent phenomenon.Louie is the poster boy for the wonderful coinage iignoranus . Signifying a person who simultaneously exhibits the qualities of robust lack of knowledge and being an excretory orifice.

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  40. e platypus onion:

    “djw-more likely bonobo fighting. They are the primates noted for being quadrasexual-they will do anything with any other bonobo for a quarter(or less). Young,old,male,female- doesn’t matter.”

    You’re right that bonobos are quadrasexual – but not that they could be a model for the military. The point about bonobo sex, is that it serves to defuse community conflict. Bonobo’s are less likely to fight than any other primates.

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  41. This creep’s claim to know about Greek history is without foundation. Does he not know about the sacred band of Thebes, a renowned army famous for its bravery – because, composed exclusively of pairs of male lovers, it was said that every man fought fiercely to protect the man he loved.

    Nothing to do with massage, at all.

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