Honey, If I Say It’s Christmas, You Better Go Get You Some Little Twinkling Lights
A couple of months ago, I told you about the weirdness of Ted Cruz’s SuperPAC giving Carly Fiorina’s SuperPAC half a million dollars. Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen was rooting around in a Pumpkin Parfait and some campaign finance reports and found this oddity.
Both Alfredo and I came up with the theory that Ted figured the only Republican who could attack Hillary Clinton was Carly Florina because they both are hooter toters. Ted, naturally, thought men would look mean calling a woman names but for another woman to do it, well, that’s just how bitch works.
A month later, the FEC asks about it, wanting an explanation of why they gave money to another candidate. Ted’s SuperPAC lied to the New York Times and said that it hadn’t decided who to support at that time.
Well, that holds about the same amount of truth as a pig has feathers.
So, this month Ted’s SuperPAC changed their story.
“Keep the Promise I made the donation in June to Ms. Fiorina at that time because we thought she had important things to say that weren’t being heard, including her poignant and effective criticism of Mrs. Clinton, at the time, the likely Democratic nominee,” Kellyanne Conway, president of Keep the Promise I told CBS News in an email.
Ta da! There ya go. “Effective criticism of Mrs. Clinton” are pretty much the magic words. Carly is being paid to attack Hillary, just as we suspected, because, you know, a whole congressional committee designed purely to bring down Clinton’s poll numbers at taxpayer expense wasn’t enough.
There was a small, tiny, unforeseen downside for Ted. Back in August when this transfer of wealth was made, Ted had no idea that Carly would use that money to overtake him in the polls. Today, Carly is at 13% while Ted is at 6%.
Maybe now Carly can give Ted some money to attack Trump because, of damn course, a woman couldn’t do that.
Thanks again to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen.
Cruz is one of those smart guys who constantly outsmarts himself.
1Karma has an Ipana smile.
2Ted Cruz–anything to promote himself, including paying off a hit-woman. Yep, that’s what Christianity is all about…pay no attention to that bearing false witness stuff…
3Political Self-immolation is a dish best served … well cold, but maybe it can’t, so ….
4“Maybe now Carly can give Ted some money to attack Trump because, of damn course, a woman couldn’t do that.”
Great point, Miss Juanita Jean! Sometimes I think I need a wall chart to follow Republicon politics. But I am afraid it would come out looking like one of those Glenn Beck conspiracy boards. First there would be a descending arrow shooting them back to the good old days circa 1800, then a long winded (no, I don’t mean winding) staircase sneaking them back to the 1960s to re-litigate Civil Rights, reproductive health for women, and stuff homosexuality including any and all sexuality back into the closet. After that, it would be a mess of squiggling offshoots for their faux outrages of the day. Then I have no words to describe what sorts of convoluted lines to use to represent those exhausting House parties to pillory HRC, defund Planned Parenthood, and bury health care. “Medicine, we don’t need no stinking medicine!,” as the greedily grasp their luxury taxpayer paid plans. (And, that is ‘just’ in the main ballroom) Behind closed committee doors they’re perfecting their Luntz-speak on any number of topics; maybe those could be expressed by symbols of pyrotechnics.
OK then! Now I have a completely black canvas, interrupted by inexplicable splotches of colour. Time to ride the range and clear my head. I’ll worry about which recycle bin to toss that piece of garbage later.
* “Luntz-speak” is defined by the objective of making down seem up and repeating lies often enough that the lies are accepted as truth.
5According to FEC advisories, Super PACs are not allowed to coordinate directly with candidates or political parties.
Sounds like Crsty is breaking Federal election laws some more.
6I thought that PACs couldn’t co-ordinate with their own candidates, so maybe the contribution to Carly’s campaign was thought to be legal??
I just think of total corruption when I see the letters “PAC”–thanks to Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.
7When this story first broke here I had some info on these CruzPacs. I’d like permission from the chair to revise and extend my remarks:
This was Keep The Promise I Cruz SuperPac, funded by $11 million from a single donor, Robert Mercer, a computer science genius turned evil hedge fund owner.
Keep the Promise II Cruz superpac is fully funded by $10 million from Randy Neugebauer’s kid, Toby, who owns an energy-industry private equity firm
Keep the Promise III Cruz SuperPac was fully funded to the tune of $15 million by members of the family who own “FracTec” – guess what THEY do?
Then there’s just plain old “Keep the Promise” funded by multiple bundlers who can’t raise enough scratch to get a Roman numeral of their own.
8They all stink to high heaven of rotted, spoiled corruption.
9“…including her poignant and effective criticism of Mrs. Clinton”
Note the diminution of HRC by using the prefix “Mrs.” instead of the earned honorific Secretary or Senator (as is standard usage), while subtly linking her to the hated President Bill Clinton.
Kind of like “Democrat Party”, instead of Democratic; Luntzian style book always used.
If only our own wordsmiths/PR spokepersons/politicians went to the same finishing schools the Repuke send theirs to.
10Just watch a number of interviews of each party’s members.
The Repuke is almost always forceful, crisp, convincing; even while spouting pure bullsh!t almost 100% of the time.
A typical Democrat will ramble all over, use ‘weak’ words, appear distracted, offbalance, appear generally noneffective; even while trying to exposit actual truth and factual information.
(of course there are exceptions to this on both sides)
It’s frustrating to me.
If Carly ran Trump’s campaign he’d soon drop out of the race.
11Several layers too deep for the Republican game. We need to find out what screen capture Carly had of Ted.
12We have a pet name for Carly, Snarly Failurerina.
13Sandridge, I think that’s one of the reasons Bernie is doing so well. He speaks with energy, enthusiasm and passion. He knows what he believes and he’s not hesitant to tell us. I really like that in a politician.
14Debbo,
And Bernie actually makes sense, unlike the ‘blind believer’ party line Rethugs.
Down here I may still crossover in the primaries, for the whackiest R still left sitting on a commode; it would probably have more effect. Plus I’d get back on the wingnut R mailing lists, always a hoot.
15Henry — that pet name should catch on with thinking folks everywhere. Thanks!
16PKM your phrase, “descending arrow” immediately brought to mind that toad Chaffetz’ buggered up slide showing that 300,000 is somehow greater than 900,000. If that isn’t republican-speak, what is?
17Linda Phipps, ah yes, the Jason moment! Can you believe the chutzpah of that lying (expletives deleted) clown to reappear in public after he was caught flat out displaying a graphic of total buckyball? That is what facts are to Republicons: desk toys.
Newsflash for the Republicons, when you declared your War on Women: You failed to consider the number of men who are fathers, sons, grandsons, brothers, cousins, uncles, husbands and other relatives who love and respect women.
18PKM –
And now Chaffetz’ chutzpah is extending to putting himself forward as the next Speaker of the House, since Marble Mouth McCarthy spilled the beans on the true motive of the endless Benghazi hearings – as if we didn’t know already.
Next to this pack of jackals, Boehner is looking absolutely statesmanlike.
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