Holy Crap: Bible College President Edition
Late last week a former Arkansas State Senator and a Bible College President were both indicted by the feds for money laundering and mail fraud.
Jon Woods
Jonathan E. Woods, 39, was Republican state senator who calls himself a “Christian conservative.” However, his wikipedia page focuses more on his rock band than his legislating.
Oren Paris III, and since with a name like that he’s either got to be a teevee preacher or a porn star, he picked the preacher and took over from his father as president of Ecclesia College in Arkansas. Here’s what you can major in there. It appears that they have an enrollment of about 200.
These two fine, Christian men got together and came up with a plan. In Arkansas, state legislators can give money – called GIFs for General Improvement Funds – to non-profits. In a web of secrecy worthy of invisible ink and and a Dick Tracy badge, Woods gave a hunk of money to Paris, who then hid it from the board of directors of Ecclesia by sending it to a consultant friend of Woods. The consultant then split the money between Wood and Paris and then took a little for himself.
They, of course, got caught.
But there’s more.
The indictment also quotes liberally from text messages between Paris and Woods, including what Paris called a “good selling point” when Woods encouraged other legislators to direct GIF money to Ecclesia: the small Christian college “produces graduates that are conservative voters. All state and secular colleges produce vast majority liberal voters.” According to the indictment, Woods replied: “Agreed.”
Yeah, that’s a good selling point for your theft of taxpayer funds – it’ll produce more people who want to steal from the taxpayers.
And, there’s this.
Woods, the legislator, was a big Donald Trump fan, but the crooked preacher man favored Ted Cruz.
We’ll keep you updated because it looks like there might be a girlfriend involved.
Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen for the heads up.
Oren should have gone with porn star. At least that way he could screw people legally.
1These dufii put the “unholy cripes” in KKKristian, when they aren’t busy modeling for the holy hell in hypocrisy.
BTW Texas, has anyone seen Teddie Crooze’s documents? Or those of his mother, when she was a Canadian citizen voting in Canada and gave birth to Teddie? One word for Teddie: disqualified.
2Thanks JJ, I needed that!
3I’ll say it . . . money laundering in the baptismal font!
4Politicians tend to use “Christianity” as a beard to cover up what they’re really doing. You know, like grand theft.
They aren’t real Christians. They just play them on tv.
5Who would Jesus screw (over)?
Can we make it illegal to call yourself a big ‘C’ christian and do this kind of crap? When did “freedom of religion” become “freedom to steal”?
Oh! And the best part? All of these bible freaks want government to leave religion alone until of course there’s some money to be grifted. THEN, they want government in their business! Hypocrisy. Pure, plain and simple.
6So, the only non-Christian majors at Ecclesia are business and sports. That says a lot right there.
7Having just survived a fundamentalist “Christian” childhood I know how little folk like this understand “self-dealing”. What an egregious evil these folks represent.
8A preacher, state senator, and consultant walk into a bar…
but it’s not funny.
9And they wonder why Christianity’s reputation is getting worse and worse.
10Rick that is funny, everyone like a good preacher downfall. I too am waiting for the girlfriend to be named,
11I was just saying today, that every single day seems to confirm my view that organized religion is a negative influence on society. Seems to me that the most overtly religious among us are also the most hypocritical, intolerant, and narrow minded folks around.
12OooobieDoooooobie, a grifter threesome, or foursome…
13This may go on longer than anyone wants but… I can’t help myself!
I know it’s anecdotal…
I have this relative, he/she has a couple of children that were home schooled for some reason. They, the children, now young adults, turned out fine, attractive, intelligent, apparently kind and caring despite being indoctrinated as idiot republican lunatic christians which as I understand they still are.
Well, one of the children, for some reason unknown to me was shipped off to a xian college in the middle of some mid western state, say Missouri or Kansas or Arkansas, somewhere no one’s ever been. I guess it was a 4 year course I dunno. Anyway, he/she eventually came back as a fine upstanding young person pretty much with the attributes previously listed only now more so.
Then he/she begin looking for gainful employment. His/her mother/father worked in the local college and helped arrange a job there teaching reading or ESL or some such thing, part time. As part time jobs will do this one came to an end and he/she wasn’t offered a permanent position.
He/she looked and looked for multiple years at the police department, highway patrol, many schools, and I suppose many other places that I’m not privy to for work. No dice anywhere for i dunno, could it have been 3, 4, 5 years? Doesn’t matter, too long. He/she eventually wound up in one of the military reserve units clear across the country. Well, nothin’ wrong with that, though it’s not really a career.
Over the years I’ve pondered this problem and although I’m pretty much aware that I may be a bit biased in some ways I can’t see any reason for the whole mess except that he/she wound up with a “diploma” from a “college” that taught nothing more then praying and bowing and kneeling and such.
That is all.
“has anyone seen Teddie Crooze’s documents?”
This is something that preys on my mind still. Especially since he’s still lurking out there!
“Can we make it illegal to call yourself a big ‘C’ christian and do this kind of crap?”
14I’m down with this. It’s fraud and it should be treated as such! If I was king I’d make it the worst kind of fraud!
“We’ll keep you updated because it looks like there might be a girlfriend involved.”
15My, wouldn’t that be fun!Maybe if were lucky it’ll be a gay girlfriend, or boyfriend!
Does that sound too unchairitable?
Debbo, they don’t know that Christianity’s reputation is getting worse and worse.
That is one of many facts they don’t know because they don’t want to know it. Facts disturb them. They are much more comfortable with alternative facts.
16if there’s a gf involved, there is (most likely) a wife/children involved as well, and not in a good way. another republican bites the dust.
17The people have worse morals than porn stars, who actually work for their money.
18Um, isn’t this exactly what Pope Frankie was talking about recently? He sounds disgusted, too!
19There’s lots of good Christians. Unfortunately or maybe fortunately they hide their lights under a barrel and don’t dress up and go pray on corners. A former boss of mine was told about a handicapped young woman who couldn’t pay her rent–so my boss, who didn’t get paid a fortune, paid the woman’s rent for years–and never talked about it. I know, you don’t have to be Christian to do that but there are good ones. She also was very egalitarian. When the shelving backed up (she was the head librarian) she was out there shelving along with everyone else.
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