Hell’s Bills: The Lege is in Session
(Hey, see what I did there? Hell’s Bills. Get it? Like Hell’s Bells except Hell’s Bills. Oh screw it, it’s a damn Tuesday.)
Okay, campers, we are headed into what will prove to be one of the most interesting Texas legislature session in the history of modern insanity.
As some of you know, I am of minimal acquaintance with a retired state representative and goat rodeo troublemaker, Glen Maxey. Maxey is reading every bill that comes through The Lege and when a bill fancies his favor he will toss it my way. In exchange for this service, I have to buy him Mexican food every time I go to Austin. I will start a Feed Glen Maxey fund sometime in the near future.
So today’s offerings are bills filed about public schools.
Hell’s Bill Numero Uno: HB93 Relating to the repeal of the offenses of failure to attend school and parent contributing to nonattendance. Okay, here’s the deal. Compulsory school attendance? Way too much compulsory in it. Let’s let parents keep kids at home doing God-only-knows-what with them.
But, if you do want to go to school …
Hell’s Bill Dos: HB138 says that the Ten Commandments can be posted in the classroom.
The board of trustees of an independent school district may not prohibit the posting of a copy of the Ten Commandments in a prominent location in a district classroom.
Well, so much for that local control that Republicans just love, love, love.
And to enforce all this …
Hell’s Bill Thirdo: HB198 – They are arming school boards.
Relating to the carrying of concealed handguns by certain persons attending a school board meeting
And those certain people? Well, that would be members of the school board. So, protecting yourself against the government just got a little bit harder because you cannot carry a gun into a school board meeting, even if you are licensed.
Its gonna be a hot time in the Old Lege in January. I am considering going to Austin for the swearing-in ceremony. If anybody would like to huddle up the night before, let me know and we’ll ponder on renting out the basement of Stubb’s barbeque.
Aw, heck. Why doesn’t TX just cut to the chase. Gun ownership and carry permits will be only issued to registered Republicans. Also accepted supporting documents are membership cards for white power groups. Permitting shall not be abridged by criminal background checks, mental health evaluations, etc.
All other non-approved groups are not permitted to own, carry, or have guns/ ammunition but are permitted to have fists. Having a fist will be considered sufficient cause for gun owners to discharge guns in aggressive manner to discourage threat to life and limb.
1So if these bills pass (any chance they won’t?), Texas kids don’t have to go to school, those who do will get one and only one official state religion in front of their eyeballs, and anybody who objects at a school board meeting risks being gunned down.
And here I thought the average Texan couldn’t get any more ignorant.
Shouldn’t point too many fingers; Marylanders just rejected a Dem candidate with virtually nothing to recommend him except “I’m the Dem and I’m black” and got a GOP governor… though he will have to squeeze any dumbass GOP ideas through a heavily Dem legislature.
Can’t wait to see how much it costs Texas taxpayers to try to defend that obviously unconstitutional #2 (which is a good number for it).
2It’s good the Texas Lege is getting off to a really fast start in addressing the most pressing problems in Texas.
I’m gonna watch how my “representatives” vote. And at every opportunity, I’ll let them know what I think.
You and Glenn Maxey have the “crappy-ist”, (sorry Momma) jobs I know. Ya’ll keep up with this idiocy. And I thank you both for what you do.
3#1 son must have lost some kind of cosmic lottery and will interning at the lege this session.
(Actually, he’s thrilled and so are we…a friend joked he must be majoring in primitive cultures or abnormal psychology.)
It’ll be a character building exercise for him – reading the opening bon mots, I’m trying to envision him getting thru five months surrounded on all sides by triple Z crazzzy people without popping his mouth off.
4Here is some semi factual background information on guns and school boards.
http://easttexasgenealogy.blogspot.com/2014/03/brownsboro-school-board-shooting-in-1960.html
5“Oh screw it, it’s a damn Tuesday” which is why I won’t comment on how the mandatory attendance laws should be improved, since it’s without a doubt ‘improvement’ is not a goal of the Tx Lege.
SomedayGirl, share with your #1 son the ten count, followed by an imaginary gohmert punch to the deserving method of resisting arguing with a fool.
6Do any of the laws passed by the legs ever make it to the Supreme Court in D.C.? It sounds as if at least one of them should.
7Looked over HB93 and it is not a repeal of compulsory attendance- seems to be attempt to keep truancy proceedings within the juvenile justice division. I think it’s probably a good thing.
8The one that scares the crap out of me is open carry. Let em keep their penis substitutes inside their pants where they belong.
9That’s…ridiculous. You can already homeschool your kid in Texas with minimal (and I do mean minimal) supervision. I did it for 12 years (autistic child, small rural school district that could not have done anything but warehouse him in spec ed, which had no access to computers, among other things.) But so did people who didn’t want their kids to learn about basic biology (e.g. s-e-x, and evolution) and nobody gave ’em any trouble. It’s a bill that’s not needed and will lead to incestuous fathers keeping their girlies home so they can make ’em pregnant. (No, I am not kidding.) And it’ll be an excuse to cut school funding even more.
As for letting school board members bring their guns to meetings…that’s gonna result in some interesting gunfights.
10Rhea — there was a whole lot of “Hogan, Who?” in Maryland on election night. Even Hogan was sure he would lose, and it surprised him greatly when a contingent of State Troopers showed up late election night to begin their body guard duties. But, most of us should have expected a Republican win because we all vote using Diebold electronic voting machines. The kind that don’t leave a paper trail, so you never can tell what the built-in Republican bias is.
11We also elected a real, bona fide, crazy person to the Anne Arundel County Commission: Michael Peroutka by the exact same method.
Next election, I’m voting by mail or by provisional ballot. At least those will be on a paper ballot.
On that “compulsory” attendance thing.
The federal government ( the one they love to hate) pays the school district XXXX$ dollars…… for kids that actually ATTEND school. That, folks, is why we have “compulsory” attendance…. and truant officers. Because I live within a block or two of the local high school…. the local school district PD, are cruising my neighborhood every morning…. to make sure….. kids go to school, where they should be.
Once again….. (apologies to Momma in advance) one of the damdest, dumbdest….. laws I’ve ever seen…. or heard of.
These people are just plain stupid.
12As dysfunctional as the Dallas ISD board is, they will likely kill each other, but only after killing the Super.
As a youth, I heard that body called the School Bored.
13Sigh.
14The problem with number one is that the kids you want to stay home never do. They are there every darn day. The students that can’t afford to miss are the ones that will.
15