.

Juanita was not proud to find out that California is laughing at Texas.

“The El Lay Times had an big ole article about how Rick Perry is always strutting around like a gobbler at laying time about how Texas comes to steal jobs from California because Texas has a much better economy than California does.  Honey, that’s a line of caca del torro so thick that you couldn’t cut through it with a Bowie knife,” she says.

“That dog don’t hunt,” she reminds us, “and California just found out.”

Texas Gov. Rick Perry delights in telling tales of his California “hunting trips” — hunting for businesses ready to flee the Golden State.

But the latest budget projections out of Texas have sharply changed the discussion: The Lone Star State is facing a budget gap of about $27 billion, putting it in the same league as California among states facing financial meltdowns. The gap amounts to roughly one-third of the state’s budget.

“So, when you get down to it, after hiding behind billions of dollars of stimulus money from the federal government for a year, come to find — Texas is in worse shape than California,” she admits.  “We knew it all along but California, which appears to be a tad slow on the uptake, probably due to that weed stuff they smoke, just found out.  Payback will be a witch.”

“The article says that Rick Perry was ‘too busy’ to be interviewed.  ‘Too busy’ is Texan-speak for ‘too dumb’,” she explains.  “They also said that he was in California last week trying to coax companies to come to Texas.  Hey, I can just hear him now saying, ‘Come to Texas!  We have electricity most days!'”

“While we are cutting services to poor children, laying off 10,000 teachers, closing state parks, and letting our infrastructure make-do with duct tape and paper clips, we get some helpful words from our Governor and Lt. Governor.  This is is the Lt. Governor, David Dewhurst, talking:”

“A lot of the things we are doing arguably aren’t priorities for the people of Texas,” he said. “People could stake me and Gov. Perry on the ground and torture us, and we still would not raise taxes.”

“Okay, but would you let us try?  Please?  I mean, if that’s an offer, dude, I’m ready to take it,” she simply states while hunting up some stakes, rope, and fire ants.

David Dewhurst would serve himself well not to paint visual pictures like that with his words when Juanita is around.  It just gives her ideas.