Fun With Guns: Texas Airport Security Edition

May 11, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

So, Bubbie, you’re in a big damn hurry and you forget that you have a gun strapped to your hip.  Happens all the time, right? Especially when you’re in a big damn hurry to catch a flight to Vegas or Gulfport, Mississippi.

Well, the Texas Legislature has a cure for you!

450px-Stagecoach-shotgunRepublican Rep. Drew Springer’s measure would protect a licensee from being arrested if he or she is caught in security with a handgun and immediately leaves the area.

So, you’re good to shoot somebody or even everybody until you get to the TSA booth, and by then, hell, you can take over the airport.

In the Lone Star State, it seems almost as common for travelers in airport security lines to forget they are carrying a handgun as it is for them to fail to take off their belts or shoes; Texas leads the U.S. in gun confiscations in airport security checks.

Texas airports confiscated 350 guns last year alone.  That means every damn day a Texan forgets he is armed.  That’s 350 Texans who aren’t gonna be any damn help at all when Obama comes to take over Texas because these gun-toting patriots have no idea they are gun-toting.  They’ll let you be herded to the Walmart secret tunnels before they remember they have a large handgun on their hip and by then it’s no help at all because it’s dark in those tunnels.

And what brought all this Guns For Free at airports stuff?

In 2013, Rep. Drew Darby was arrested in Austin after officers found a loaded pistol in his carry-on luggage that he said he’d forgotten about.

Yep, shirt check, tie check, laptop check, bag of Cheetos check, .357 check and forget.

You know what I wonder?  Does this also apply to Muslims or just white guys?  And exactly how man guns can you forget you have if you get caught?

Thanks to AlanInAustin for the heads up.

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0 Comments to “Fun With Guns: Texas Airport Security Edition”


  1. UmptyDump says:

    In the words of Jingles, as played by Andy Devine, “Hey, partner, how’d you get past TSA onto this stagecoach with that shotgun?!”

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  2. UmptyDump says:

    JJ asks to whom this exemption would apply. It appears that it already applies to state lawmakers because the Travis County State’s Attorney and the judge dropped charges against Drew. “Professional courtesy,” no doubt.

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  3. I’d like to ask why they feel the need. “For protection!” Against what? “….. well…. You never know!”

    Yeah, obviously you don’t.

    Most of us let the police and so on protect us. These rwnjs don’t trust the government to do that, and don’t want to pay taxes for roads, schools, libraries, fire protection, safe food and drugs and toys….

    What they really want is what Hobbes described as “man in a state of nature” before there were governments. Hobbes said that life then was “solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.” I guess that’s what they want. Kinda describes them too.

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  4. If you can’t remember you’re carrying a gun, it’s a public service to take that gun away from you.

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  5. How about we propose a punishment that a GOP mind will comprehend.

    1st time caught: $5000.00 fine per gun; $1000.00 per round.
    2nd time: $50,000.00 fine per gun; $10,000.00 per round.

    If you get caught 3 times (in addition to another 10X jump in fines), your TX DL and CCL will be revoked as there is data proving total incompetence.

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  6. With all due respect to Momma.

    Ah….. Sh**!

    @Mel

    Let’s do the CCL revocation on the second violation.
    TDL on the third.

    Once…. it’s a learning situation.

    Twice…. it’s “deliberate”.

    Three Strikes…. You’re Out!

    (It’s a baseball thang). 🙂

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  7. buskyandme says:

    Rick is right, how do you forget you are carrying a gun?

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  8. This will only increase the number of arrests of Texas Guntwits in other states as they try to return home and forget they aren’t in Texas anymore. And some states aren’t nearly as nice as Texas when they arrest you.

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  9. Corinne Sabo says:

    I don’t have a gun permit. Can I carry a taser to stop the gun guys?

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  10. Aggieland Liz says:

    @Rhea-no need to pick on the short guys now! I like ’em-they stand up straight!

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  11. Sam in San Antonio says:

    So an a$$hat can go wearing his gun and play Concealed Hokey Pokey:

    You put one foot in
    You take one foot out
    Pull out your pistol and wave it all about

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  12. @Aggieland, I think they’re short from bending over so their knuckles drag in the dirt. Or from the weight of the stupid gun they don’t remember they have.

    And they forget they’re carrying a gun because they never take the damn thing off. One idiot even shot his wife because he was curled up with it in bed. They must have had their teddybears or pacifiers taken away too early or something because they’ve just gotta suck on that gun.

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  13. Angelo Frank says:

    So Republican Rep. Drew Springer is attempting to nullify federal law? Slap his hand quick.

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  14. I think I figured it out. All those weapons cause amnesia. In a little bit, it won’t just be the weapons they forget but every damn thing else.

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  15. AliceBeth says:

    Sorry, “I forgot I was carrying a gun” is only used once. After that, you can never ever ever carry any firearm anytime anywhere EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  16. AliceBeth, that goes double if you leave it behind in a public restroom, and triple if a kid picks it up. Which we know has happened.

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  17. Angelo Frank, I was thinking the same thing. Federal jurisdiction is in play here.

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  18. maryelle says:

    After this conversation, I’m changing my flight reservations.
    I won’t be changing planes in Dallas.

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