Fun With Guns: Freezer Edition

May 04, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

It was in Fort Worth Texas where Open Carry advocates are prancin’ and dancin’.

Here’s the low down —

An email from Sgt. Ray Bush, with the Fort Worth Police Department, said Jack in the Box employees at the South Freeway location at Sycamore School Road, were scared about the armed men protesting outside of the restaurant.

“They locked themselves inside a freezer for protection out of fear the rifle-carrying men would rob them,” the email stated.

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The police responded, as they should, as if an armed robbery was in progress.

Now get this:  one of the damfools said that he carries his semi-automatic Smith and Wesson on his back “to avoid making people think he plans to use it.”

Yeah, that’s the same reason I carry around a chainsaw – so people will know that I don’t plan on using it.

You know, if that’s his theory, I should be required by law to push a vacuum cleaner everywhere I go.  I sure the hell don’t plan on using that.

It’s just a matter of time, y’all, until somebody dies over a deal like this.  I sure hope it ain’t me.  When I die, I want to be real old and real sick, or at least doing something worth dying for.  I do not want “innocent bystander” anywhere in my obituary.

I do not carry my firearm in public.  First off, my cajones are plenty big and everydamnbody knows it.  Second off, I ain’t buying this Constitutional Right thing.  I also have a right to free speech but I don’t talk the whole time when I leave the house.  Sometime I listen to Willie Nelson and sometime I go into a restaurant without everybody running and hiding.  Honey, the only thing that needs to hide when I go into a restaurant is the Tres Leches.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

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0 Comments to “Fun With Guns: Freezer Edition”


  1. maryelle says:

    The ‘guns n’ glory’ tribe was miffed that so many cops showed up and treated them like criminals, while the Jack in the Box employees were miffed that the g & g tribe scared the crap out of them. That’s exactly what those bozos wanted to do, scare people
    with their great big d_ _ _ _ s, sorry guns.
    Morons!

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  2. Sanborne Addison says:

    Tres Leches. It lives in fear of me, too.

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  3. Elizabeth says:

    People who get a kick out of scaring other people are bullies at best and terrorists at worst. These persons know they scare people and they like it. They are trying to scare people into giving them what they want (the right to carry AND USE their weapons anywhere–like say a movie theater if someone annoys them, or a street if they don’t happen to want someone walking down it.) Domestic terrorism pure and simple.

    The notion that slinging your loaded piece somewhere on your body other than in your hand is supposed to convince people you won’t use it is ridiculous. Everybody with a television has seen firearms quickly retrieved and used from a variety of carry locations. The open carry nutjobs are just aching for a chance to shoot someone–they get high on the very thought of shooting someone; that’s why the ranges where they practice have human-shaped targets. That’s why their Twitter feeds and Facebook pages and so on are full of threats and brags about what they’ll do if they “need” to. People have already been shot by their kind; more will be.

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  4. RepubAnon says:

    Isn’t the whole point of open carry that the firearm needs to be ready for use when the ravening hordes of mutant armadillos begin swarming up from sewers? Isn’t that the point – that it has become so very, very dangerous to just walk around these days that they need to carry loaded firearms everywhere? (Never can tell when a chupacabra might try to get your goat.)

    And if it isn’t that dangerous, and they’re not planning on using their firearms – why not leave the weapons home?

    The answer, of course, is that they want the legal right to kill anyone that they personally and subjectively think poses a threat. Someone whose tan isn’t the right shade of orange, say – or is wearing a hoodie.

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  5. legion357 says:

    It is legal to carry a “long gun” in Texas, the law is years old but when it was written I think they meant shotguns, hunting rifles ect. not ar 15’s and i’m sure not to parade around a urban area with them.

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  6. OldMayfly says:

    Here is a riddle:

    “What do you get when ‘Open Carry’ coincides with ‘Stand Your Ground?’ ”

    Answer:

    A Darwin Award.

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  7. OldMayfly says:

    I should add, the Police Department’s “signage” comment is interesting. I guess the PD is just trying to deal with the craziness of these laws–but I don’t think that’s possible.

    For example, if I’m managing a fast-food place and a few guys with guns and signs reading “This isn’t a robbery” enter my establishment–I am definitely going to call 911 and also try to get the employees to safety.

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  8. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Those goobers were lucky it wasn’t one of our shoot first and ask questions later PDs.

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  9. Elise Von Holten says:

    They have already got my goat–all the way back to Shrub reading about my pet on 9/11. It just keeps getting crazier.
    Sigh.

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  10. the best Tres Leches I ever had was in Miami. The Best.

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  11. Elizabeth, I think they get a kick out of scaring people because *they* are scared. If they weren’t scared, they wouldn’t feel the need to carry lethal weapons around when they’re not on a battlefield.

    And guess who makes them scared:

    NRA president, Wayne LaPierre, made sure nobody left [the NRA convention] unaware of the challenges. “There are terrorists and home invaders and drug cartels and carjackers and knockout gamers and rapers, haters, campus killers, airport killers, shopping mall killers, road-rage killers,” he said. “And killers who scheme to destroy our country with massive storms of violence against our power grids, or vicious waves of chemicals or disease that could collapse the society that sustains us all.”

    http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/may/04/gun-control-violence-poverty-segregation-nra

    Of course, the more fear, the more gun sales for Wayne’s supporters: the gun companies. And the more fear, the more people listen to Wayne and the NRA and stroke those egos.

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  12. The “wild west” was not like this– in towns like Tombstone AZ you had to check your guns at the town marshall’s office. They had better gun control than we do.

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/fact-checker/wp/2014/04/29/rick-santorums-misguided-view-of-gun-control-in-the-wild-west/

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  13. If/when someone does die in a situation like this the odds aren’t too bad that it will be one of the gun-toters when the police arrive and misread his good intentions.

    And if the shootin’ has already started then I can pretty much guarantee that the police will assume anyone brandishing a gun is a bad guy.

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  14. Marge Wood says:

    Rhea, thank you for the link. Lock up them shootin’ arns.

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  15. Ralph Wiggam says:

    I agree with Elizabeth, these people are terrorists and should be treated as such.

    And they claim that it is their right to make us live in fear.

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  16. e platypus onion says:

    Would it be ironic if someone shoved a pen or pencil through Wayne La PeePee’s earhole into his brain,proving that the pen is just as deadly as his guns?

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  17. maggie says:

    Oh **ap! Those open carry gunslingers are total DNA kin to the same type who run wild with weapons slung on their backs in Afghanistan, Sudan, you name it stan! And in at least one of these places we sent in the U.S. Army.

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  18. I gather they weren’t wearing their purple hats, which would have been a giveaway.

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  19. W. C. Peterson says:

    e platypus onion: It probably wouldn’t make a bit of difference to Wayne. He’s not using his brain, anyway. It’s rattling around in there like a BB in a boxcar.

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  20. MoCity Joe says:

    I couldn’t agree more with most of the fearful comments made on this topic. I’m not good at positioning an argument but would sign an awareness email campaign to elected officals to the dangers we are up against. With the right to carry in any fashion and in any location both public and private, we are set up for violent anarchy. It is so obvious of what direction this is heading given the proliferation of assault weapons, militia groups, and assault weapons training. Our politicians have empowered the 25% of our population, bent on civil war. The Clive Bundy standoff situation served as a training exercise for the militia groups domestic warfare.

    With the situation at the Jack-In-The-Box: So, people can gather around an establishment with loaded guns (open/carry) and as long as no shots are fired, can stay there to intimidate people. Folks we are in dire straits.

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  21. SteveTheReturned says:

    I’m wondering if there are only a dozen or so open carry militants in the whole country, going from place. I know that’s wishful thinking, but hell, they all look the same: white, male, facial hair, thrown-on clothing, and of course those expensive assault rifles, which they don’t look like they can afford. Seriously though, these twerps see it as their mission to reduce this country to one big armed camp—they want everybody to get used to them turning up, armed and dangerous, at local burger joints, shopping malls, etc. They want us to be like them. I refuse—and I’ve been a gun owner for better than 50 years.

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  22. Miss Prissybritches says:

    I will never forget the sick feeling I had in the pit of my stomach the first time I realized I was standing in line at the grocery story with a dude packing heat. ‘Welcome Back to Texas, Prissybritches.’ I just don’t get it… and I just don’t like it.

    I do, however, make a mean Tres Leches cake, recipe compliments of my next door neighbor in Cabo San Lucas. It was their family’s traditional go-to celebration cake, and involves a whole lot of coconut. I’d almost Stand My Ground for Keke Coco Loco.

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  23. JAKvirginia says:

    Maryelle, a joke for you about big d—-s.

    One day an elephant was walking through the jungle, stumbled and fell into quicksand. “Help! Save me!” he shouted. A mouse living in a nearby tree heard the cries and rushed to assist. He told the elephant “Wait. I’ll be right back”. As the elephant sank slowly into the muck, the mouse reappeared with his Mercedes, threw the elephant a rope and pulled him from certain death.

    “Thank you, mouse!” said the elephant. “If ever you need help I will be more than happy to be there.” And they went their separate ways.

    Some weeks later, the mouse, making a risky move on a tree branch for a tasty morsel, fell into the some quicksand. “Help!” he cried. “Save me!” The elephant, who happened to be nearby, heard the cries and hurried over. With no rope or car, the elephant straddled the quicksand and lowered his, um, appendage which the mouse grabbed and was rescued.

    The moral to the story? If you have a big d—k you don’t need a Mercedes!

    Probably the same with guns.

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  24. Zyxomma says:

    Oh, this day has involved way to much reading about, and thinking about, guns and the people who fire them. My sweet former hiking partner, a martial artist, paramedic, yogi, and terrific photographer, had a tragic death in the family. JJ, you’re getting the deets by email. Jack-in-the-box, put the bunny in the box, I don’t care. I’m sick of all of it.

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  25. maryelle says:

    Good one, JAK!

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  26. Rubymay says:

    Really good one, JAK! And JJ reminded me of the one about “When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not crying and screaming like the passengers in his car.” Nor do I care to go as a bystander.

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  27. Corinne Sabo says:

    Don’t carry it and them everyone will know it is not for use.

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