Now you’d think that if someone called themselves a “Freewill Baptist,” they would favor freewill.   This is not true.  We woke up to busloads of old, mean women in orthopedic shoes with bad cases of constipation.

First thing I hear when I walk into the breakfast room of the hotel is one old woman saying to another old woman, “Then this black girl came up to me and you know how black girls are….” at which point they both rolled their eyes.

It is only through the grace of God that I did not dunk her head into the scrambled egg buffet tray and loudly declare her soul saved of the evils of all things black girl.

When the second bus pulled up …

… Bubba asked me please, please, please not to get into a Bible drill with old ladies, especially those who actually need their heads drilled to relieve the pressure of damn dumb.  I believe that none of them could  read anyway because I was pretty sure that they wouldn’t be wearing Hush Puppies with knee high hose and polyester dresses if they had a teevee or could read the news.

They loaded up their buses and headed out to plant their grass-murdering signs all over North Carolina.  I was going to let the air out of their tires but Bubba said I better not because every lawyer in North Carolina is tied up with the John Edwards trial.  Good point.

But, we don’t need buses when we have activist like Paul.  I meet Paul last night wearing his I VOTED sticker.  Honey, I will pit Paul against seven buses of mean old women.  Paul is a very gifted photography student at ECU and is taking every other student he knows to vote.

Little did Republicans know when they put this on the ballot that it would be become an amazing organizing tool for young Democrats.  It is explained to young voters that they not only have to vote this down, they have to go back in November to elect Democrats to the state house to keep crap like this and old grouchy women hitting people with their Bibles from happening.