Dear Sarah Palin
If any of y’all see Sarah Palin anywhere around, please hand her this.
Dear Sarah Palin,
Wipe that smirk off your face, woman. You look like a fool.
You go all Chicken Little to your base of old men who can’t hear worth a damn and think the whippersnappers took their manhood instead of old age. What the tarnation are you talking about?
Sarah Palin says America will eventually default on its debt and claims that the federal government is “stockpiling bullets in case of civil unrest” to prepare.
“If we are going to wet our proverbial pants over 0.3% in annual spending cuts when we’re running up trillion dollar annual deficits, then we’re done. Put a fork in us. We’re finished. We’re going to default eventually and that’s why the feds are stockpiling bullets in case of civil unrest,” Palin wrote in a Facebook message Tuesday.
Girl, get off of Facebook and go read a book. And what the hell proverbial pants are you talking about? I do not own one single pair of proverbial pants and if you have a problem wetting yours get some of those old lady pads that you can buy some machine to twist for you if you don’t have time to. I don’t want to be thinking about this stuff, so shuddup.
Who are “the feds”? I mean, are you going all jackbooted thugs on us? Are the feds now some horrible thing coming to lock you up in an invisible concentration camp buried under the Denver airport?
And they’re stockpiling ammo to come shoot you? Why would they do that? Honey, you have done more damage to yourself than a whole armory could do. Why would they want to compete?
But I haven’t even gotten to the good part yet.
After spouting this crapola, here’s how you concluded —
Palin wrote that she wants lawmakers to “stop the hysterics.”
Girl, do you even know what hysterics means? It means going around claiming the feds are stockpiling ammo to kill you. That’s what it means. Look it up.
Girl, sneeze – your brain is all dusty.
Love and Fried Okra,
Juanita
Thanks to David for the heads up.
If Marble Falls TEA Party had the bucks Sarah would be a great match.
1Feds, as in those Federal Agents coming for our firearms that we just passed a law saying we can arest for doing their job in our state (that was Alaska, right?).
2Amazing. John McCain spent 10 times the effort trying to manufacture a Benghazi issue than he spent on due diligence before picking this mental midget as his running mate.
3I sent Snowbilly Grifter a Tweet yesterday regarding this latest bit of asininity~Ft. Richardson and Elmendorrf AFB back up to each other in Anchorage – they have PLENTY of BULLETS and could hit her ridiculous butt anytime they want to from their computers without breaking a sweat or having to put on a coat.
My LilSis is a retired USArmy Blackhawk pilot who was commander of several posts in Alaska – which also gave her the opportunity of being former Gov. Tony Knowles’ pilot and gave me the opportunity to see many Army posts in Alaska. Snowbilly is fully aware of the “stockpiled bullets” and “war stuff” stashed all over Alaska.
4Haven’t the conservatives been falling all over themselves to give the government our tax money to ensure that the military is well stocked with whatever weaponry, including bullets, the feds desire?
5Forgot to add: the feds have enough weapons to decimate the entire world including the good old USA.
6Whew! Sarah is some kind of betsy bug crazy.
7All this…… from that “proverbial political sage”…..
Sarah Palin????
Granted, it doesn’t make sense…. but she actually put enough sentences together to make a paragraph???? That’s a big step for ole Sarah.
Thing is….. just because it’s rattlin’ around in her head….. is really no reason to have it come out of her mouth. When she figures that out……. that will be even a bigger step for the half-Governor.
And, it will be to the everlasting benefit of all of us.
8That imbecile doesn’t have even one functioning brain cell capable of reasoning.
9She wants ’em to “stop the hysterics” because they’re violatin’ her trademark.
10But the Feds will set up Death Panels first, so all the shooting is decided in a fair manner, right Sarah?
11Sarah should fear the stockpiling of straight jackets. She might think that’s a good idea.
12“Straight Jackets a cure for the Gay, Don’t ya know”
The Gun Nuts here in CO started stocking up on guns and ammo right after the Newtown tragedy. And Rep. Buck McKeon [R] of CA was on CNN2 this morning spewing his lies about the Prez saying the sequestration was all Obama’s doing and it was his Armeggedon and ALL of the military won’t have what they need and it is all Obama’s fault! And then there are those who think that, by God, Diane Feinstein is gonna be knocking on your doors and grabbing your guns away!
13The craziness is getting to me!!
Also too:
More asinine Winning the Future(WTF) bs tactics from DC: Dem says sequester may cost 170 million jobs.Hey skookums media, check on that, eh? https://twitter.com/SarahPalinUSA/status/307344629190258688
14Is a moose stampede civil unrest?
15In the Fall of 2008, when Sarah & John were running against against Barack, I went to a pumpkin patch to get, you know, some pumpkins. The farmer had a lot of scary stuff for kids, including a real live witch. Came face to face with the witch & before thinking I blurted out, “Oh my gawd. it’s Sarah Palin” with many adults within hearing range. I quickly thought geeze what did I just say in this red county in Badgerland. To my surprise, almost to a person, all the adults laughed. Barack took the county & the state that year. Please Sarah just go away & deal with your disfunctional family.
16My husband, bless his heart, works as a heavy equipment operator and therefore hangs out with quite a few people who pass for rednecks here in Vermont. He bought the line about the Y2K apocalypse and filled our basement with food and water. He already had the old hunting weapons, “family heirlooms”. Well, he has mellowed considerably since then and I even remind him when it’s Election Day most years. I am proud to say that he is pro-choice, voted twice for Barack Obama and never gave Sarah Palin’s vaudeville act any credence.
I am writing this because I think most of the crapola circulating now is because any idiot with a smart phone or computer can get their ravings in front of a huge audience. Some will buy it, but most people will snigger and roll their eyes.
Our challenge now is to shore up voting rights in every state and replace most of the House of Representatives.
17Back when the Y2K scare was going around, we had a wine cellar in our Denver home that held about 200 cases of French Bordeaux. I made sure we had a couple of good corkscrews, some glasses, and an ample supply of crackers down there…. I figured we were toast at best, so if we became a Mad Max-like society I wasn’t interested in surviving that anyway. When they started talking about securing your windows with plastic and duct tape, I determined that we should just drink as much of our really good wine as possible in the waning hours of life as we knew it. I think my plan was spot-on.
Oh, I did put some distilled water bottles down there. I so hate drinking out of dirty glassware with spots.
18It’s the WACKOS leading the WACKOS! Hope everybody saw the movie,
19Game Change. It illustrates the Palin persona wonderfully.
Also, the HBO show, “Newsroom” described Republicans like her as the American Taliban. Aaron Sorkin, you have a way with words.