In The Big Lebowski, the Stranger says, “Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes, well, he eats you.”  I’d like to add … And sometimes nobody gets dinner.

A year and half ago I told you about a billboard near Lufkin, Texas, that just beats all.  Even for East Texas.

I made Ole Bubba pull over and let me take a picture of it because I considered it a Republican crime scene.  You have to put a disclaimer on political signs in Texas saying who paid for it.   This sign had no disclaimer.  No right wing nut in all of East Texas had the guts to stand up and say what they believe and put their name on it.   It comes from their days of wearing hoods.

The Angelina Democratic County Chair  filed a complaint with FEC.  And the FEC made their ruling last November.  I’m just now finding out about it because somebody, and I’m not going to mention any names here but their initials are Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen, fell down on the job.

The FEC was able to trace the purchaser back to Winston Ranch in Lufkin, where the Piney Woods Cattle Baron’s Ball is held, and specifically to Virginia Winston as the purchaser.  She had two signs.  The cost was $10,500.

In response to the complaint, Virginia hand wrote back to the FEC that she is an 82 year old widow woman with health issues.  She claims not to know anything about these rules and she just copied something she saw on the internet.  It should be noted that Virginia is also a member of the Lufkin Junior League, and that Winston Ranch is not exactly a trailer park.   (Click here and see page 29)  It’s a 1,000 acre cattle ranch with award winning cows.  This old woman probably has enough money to burn a wet elephant.

I’d be willing to bet that Virginia has more lawyers on retainer than the FEC does.

So, Virginia leads the FEC to believe she’s some poor widow woman living on social security with a hacking cough who doesn’t even own a computer to write her letters.

So they don’t even fine her because, as they say, “she seems highly unlikely to repeat the violations.”

Oh, so you get one free ride at the FEC if you’re old.  Dude, I am so going to remember that.  Another ten years and a nasty bout of pneumonia and I can start making money by people paying me to take responsibility for FEC violations.

I have proper Junior League stationery, Virginia’s address, and full intent to find out how much money Winston Ranch gets in ag exemptions and government subsidies.  I am going to let her know, in the sweetest way possible, that I’m going to buy an ad in the newspaper, print a list of all the government aid she gets, and sign my name to it.

I figure that evens things up, because I believe in personal responsibility and consequences.  No, wait, only Republicans believe that.