Paper ballots are back in the news again.

I vote a paper ballot because Texas law says a person who is over 65, disabled, or is going to be out of the county during the voting period can vote by mail.  I also serve on the ballot board, where mail ballots are tediously verified by signature with both a Democrat and a Republican present, then opened and laid flat for the voting machine to count them.  It’s a tedious two-week job but it restores my faith in democracy and in voting.

I do not like electronic voting.  My county’s voting machines are radial dial, which are difficult to use, and that causes voter suppression. I don’t like them and you can’t make me.

Denton, Texas, just north of Dallas – or, as the locals say, “if Oklahoma sucked just a little more, they’d pull Denton out of Texas.” – has decided to go back to paper ballots.  Their last election was a damn mess.  The people who make voting machines claim it was a human mistake, the humans say no the hell not.

I dunno for sure, but I think it would be harder for the Russians to steal an election with paper ballots, especially since you can hand-count paper ballots for a recount.

I damn well hope the rest of Texas falls in the paper ballot box before too long.  Yeah, they can be stolen and messed with, but it just damn harder to do if you have a metal box and good lock.

Thanks to Marc for the heads up.

Okay, I will admit that I have gone upstairs and then stood there wondering why I came up there.  But, to my credit, I can generally see a limo when it’s directly in front of me and I only rarely don’t know how to work the damn thing.

Old man wanders off and has to be shown the way back.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Ted Cruz decided to spend the 4th of July in McAllen, Texas.  McAllen is home to about 130,000 people and is 85% Hispanic.

Cruz did not have fun at the parade.  He, of course, was met by protesters.  When you go to a highly Hispanic and Democratic city along the border and you favor sending half of most family back to Mexico, it’s kinda unlikely that they want you to be Grand Marshall of the parade.

Y’all, seriously, I think the boy was lost.  Or dunk.  I dunno.

“Ted Wants Us Dead,” was a favorite chant.  My personal favorite sign? “No transfer of wealth 4 our health.”

Cruz referred to the protesters as a “small group of people on the left who right now are very angry.”  Small?  Did he say small?  Honey, only 12% approve of the senate healthcare bill.  Who looks small now?

Thanks to Deb for the heads up.

This is where I will be tonight, in the bluest big city in a red, red state.  Happy Fourth, you guys.

What ya doin’ today?

And an amusing reminder of how America is seen worldwide, now that Trump says they aren’t laughing at us now.

Thanks to SGray for the heads up.

Chris Christie decided to take his 15% approval rating out for a day on the beach.

Here’s the deal.  Christie shut down the government in New Jersey over a budget standoff.  That meant all the beaches and state parks are closed over the 4th of July weekend.  You know, to everybody except … Chris Damn Christie.

Land Beach State Park was closed by Christie’s showdown.  So Christie and his family were the lucky winners of a whole beach all to themselves. They are using the summer beach house provided by the state for a weekend down at the shore.

Christie, who first disclosed his weekend plans on Monday, said Sunday he was taking the state helicopter to go back and forth between Island Beach State Park and Trenton.

When asked if it was fair that he got the whole island to himself, Christie responded, “Run for governor, and you can have a residence there.”

.

Thanks to Deb T for the heads up.

As you’ve probably heard by now, a group of people who refuse to accept that they lost the damn Civil War, started a rumor that some folks were going to come to Gettysburg and remove confederate war relics.  You know, like the damn white flag the rebels waved.  I am convinced that they themselves started this rumor so they could prance around showing off their guns and battle flags while they denounce CNN and Nancy Pelosi.

Pictures of the event prove the group is not only anti-United States, but also anti-sleeve.  They have cornered the market on leather vests with wide girth.

One of the rumors was that the good guys were going to come and urinate on confederate graves.  Dude, we don’t even own leather vests or a decent tattoo, so we don’t urinate in public.  Additionally, there are no marked confederate graves at Gettysburg, so we’d look mighty funny pissing in the wind.

So, one of the head guys gives a speech and says …

“The next thing you know, they’re going to take our Constitution and say you know what? That was written by slave-holders, it’s racist, let’s get rid of it and become a communist nation. I don’t want that on my watch.”

Whoa, Mr. Klan, it’s your president who is playing footsie with he commies.  Confusing for you, ain’t it?

They had a speaker by the name of Jenny Lee, who claimed to be Robert E Lee’s third great grand niece.  Honey, Robert E Lee had three brothers so everybody in the South is related to Robert E Lee.  Jenny implored the crowd not to buy into political correctness.  Really?  Like maybe how Robert E Lee got handed his butt on a Yankee platter and retreated at Gettysburg?  Or surrendered to General Grant while waving a white flag?

They make me crazy, y’all.  Not only are they hateful and mean, they know diddle squat about history.

Anyway, the highlight of the day was a man attempting to do an accidental human sacrifice on the battlefield where they got beat once and came back for seconds. Their enemy did not even bother to show up, preferring to sit at home watch them shoot each other.

But the only person actually shot Saturday in Gettysburg with a real bullet was a 23-year-old militia group member named Benjamin Hornberger, of Shippensburg, Pennsylvania. According to U.S. Park police, Hornberger triggered his revolver when the flag pole he was carrying bumped against his gun holster. The bullet went into his leg. Police say officers quickly applied a tourniquet, likely saving his life.

What a waste of a perfectly good tourniquet.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.