Well, come to find out, even though Trump constantly says he was great at high school baseball and could have gone pro … no.  Not even close.

In fact, he was pretty much the kid they picked last for the team.

Slate has managed to unearth nine box scores from Trump’s time at New York Military Academy, which showed a four-for-29 batting record in his sophomore, junior, and senior seasons, with three runs batted in and a single run scored. Trump’s batting average in the nine games Slate found box scores for stood at a disappointing .138.

 

I don’t know many first basemen with a .138 batting average outside of Little League. We could ask Yuli Gurriel if he knows any.

He also cheats at golf.

By the way, this is amazing.  42 epic half-innings, one after another

Here ya go —

President Barack and Michelle Obama are the keynote speakers at a graduation ceremony for the class of 2020 and they’ve got a crowd of other people who want to make graduation special for kids across America.

It’s going to go a little like this:

This sounds like such fun!

Reminder: this is what real leaders do.

The Quorum Report is a news aggregator and breaking news breaker. They are by subscription only and are the go-to political news in Texas. Harvey Kronberg runs the joint.

They don’t have breaking news every day, but today they did.

Remember death panels?  Well, the Governor isn’t bothered by that now.

By the way, Texas ranks 47th among the states for Covid19 testing.  Way to go, Gov.

Okay, I’m gonna admit that I woke up this morning a little down.  Down, dooby do down down, comma  comma, down dooby do … oh good lord, I’m so depressed that I’m having a Neil Sedaka attack.

The thought of facing a resurgence of 3,000 deaths a day (think about it – that’s a 911 every damn day) and being locked in my house for three more months just made me crazy.

I was doing a housecoat rant this morning about all the things I want – I want to go to the farmer’s market and feel the peaches to see if they are ripe. I want to take a nap in the hammock with my grandson. I want to go to the eye doctor for new glasses – and this time I’m gonna get some with rhinestones. I want to go to the theater for a musical and slug the person behind me if they think it’s a sing-along. I want to eat crawfish for hours with a whole bunch of people around the table. I want go somewhere at night with my fancy clothes on. .

And there is my idea.

I think I’m going to put up my Christmas lights and I’m going to invite my friends to come drive by my house at night and see some damn joy. I think you ought to do the same thing. I think this should be viral so you can drive around at night to see the lights.  I don’t know about foreign states, but in Texas we can do tacky and extravagant with sublime perfection. Some people even hire other people to do their lights professionally, which is a job and goodness knows we need jobs.

We could just leave those suckers up until December. We could add a flag for the 4th of July, some political signs for election day, you know, keep it topical.

The only downside I see is that if a hurricane comes, you gotta haul all that crap back into the garage, but face it, you ain’t got nothing to do anyway.

That’s my idea. I think it’s a pretty good idea considering all the other ideas I’ve heard lately.

Or, you could be like Glen and build a chicken coop and bird feeder in your backyard made out of old political signs.

See, I told you we can do tacky with perfection in Texas.

Okay, I need to give y’all a heads up. Stay away from the Family Dollar Store. And Michigan. Stay out of Michigan.

Last Saturday, in the middle of the damn afternoon, a man walks into the Family Dollar Store in Detroit. The clerk asks him to put on a mask. He did not want to put on a mask, so he wiped his nose on her clothes.

She was so stunned that she was afraid to move.

And there’s plenty of reason she should be afraid.

The day before, a security guard in Flint, Michigan, at the Family Dollar Store was shot in the head and killed for telling a woman to put on a mask inside the store.

And these are the people that President Trump says are “good people” and that Governor Whitmer should give a little to them.

Suggestion: give them a life sentence.

Thanks, Trump.

Thanks to SGray for the heads up.

Ken Paxton’s crookedness is like a virus spreading all over the country.

The story starts here. Lots of Texans have summer homes in Colorado, and a lot of them have million dollar homes there.

When a small county in the Colorado mountains banished everyone but locals to blunt the spread of the coronavirus, an unlikely outsider raised a fuss: Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, who called it an affront to Texans who own property there and pressed health officials to soften the rules.

“The banishment of nonresident Texas homeowners is entirely unconstitutional and unacceptable,” Paxton said in a news release April 9, when his office sent a letter asking authorities in Gunnison County to reverse course.

Unconstitutional? Why, my goodness, that’s a heady word to be tossing around in another state where I seriously doubt that Paxton has a home, a recognized license to practice law, or even has a sled. What Paxton does have is gall and a pay-to-play attitude.

On April 9, Paxton sent a letter to small Gunnison County from the official office of the Texas Attorney General “urging” them to reverse course and let part-timers come stay at their property during the lockdown.

The remote community of 17,000 people has only one hospital with 24 beds and no intensive care unit, and health officials cited the scarcity of resources in ordering nonresidents to leave.

This is happening at the height of Texas requiring people from New York and Louisiana to self-quarantine for 14 days.

So why is is important for Texans to be allowed to come back to one small county in Colorado where it just so happens that college friend of Paxton’s (Robert McCarter) has a $4 million home?

Paxton has at least nine donors in Texas who own property in Gunnison County, and who collectively have given him and his wife nearly $2 million in political contributions.

Less than three hours after Paxton announced the letter, Gunnison County granted McCarter an exemption to stay, according to documents obtained by AP. The county says the timing was coincidental.

Ken Paxton: Still indicted for tax fraud.

Thanks to Anna the Geek for the heads up.