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Well, click right here.

… a big tea party convention in Tampa, FL this weekend — headlined by such conservative favorites as Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX), Fox News Judge Andrew Napolitano, and former GOP Congressman Tom Tancredo — attracted only about 300 people. The Save America Convention’s website lists 25 guest speakers, meaning there was one speaker for every 12 attendees. If one includes the 13 musicians and other performers listed as entertainment, that ratio drops to one for every 7 and a half.

That’s about the same ratio of cows to people in Texas, and after careful consideration we decided not to let cows vote.

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They say what goes ’round, comes ’round and I suspect they are right.

“It’s the 1950’s all over again,” Juanita announces.

And U.S. companies selling doomsday bunkers are seeing sales skyrocket anywhere from 20% to 1,000%.

“I guess that whole crawl under your desk and cover your head thing isn’t working out, because now these bunkers are costing up to $20 million.  Personally, I figure they’re about as good as a paper grocery bag over your head.  Besides, if they don’t work, who are you gonna complain to?  Oh yeah, Bob’s Bunker Builders stand behind their products.  If you can find Bob and he’s standing, you get your money back.  Of course, if your bunker didn’t work, you won’t be in the complaint line, which is a big relief for Bob.”

“Plus,” she continues, “you think the minimum wage workers building these things aren’t leaving a trap door for themselves?”

“Look, she continues, “I heard the other day that to get people to do something, they have to be inspired, scared or mad.  It seems that we’ve given up on inspired since the last Presidential election, the Teabaggers gave mad a bad name, so all we have left is scared.”

“I think we here at The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. are gonna start marketing us a Genuine Real Nuclear Invisible Shield, cleverly disguised as a simple baseball cap.  It’ll protect you from nuclear fallout, bunions, annoying paper cuts, a tragic zombie attack.  Just $99.99.  And that’s not all.  If you order within the next three months, you also get this lovely super duper genuine faux pearl necklace that wards off earthquakes, polar ice cap slides, and Mormons.”

Don’t be caught unprepared!

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Okay now they’ve done it.

They have hacked Juanita off.

“You can do a lot of things without angering me.  But you cannot mug Rosie and walk away laughing,” she warns.

Maine Gov. Paul LePage has ordered the removal of a 36-foot mural depicting Maine’s labor history from the lobby of the Department of Labor.

Worker advocates described the move as a “mean-spirited” provocation amid the administration’s high-tension standoff with unions.

According to LePage spokesman Dan Demeritt, the administration felt the mural and the conference room monikers showed “one-sided decor” not in keeping with the department’s pro-business goals.

“It’s called the Department of Labor, Governor. It’s not called the Department of Robber Barons,” Juanita stomps.

Rosie the Riveter is pictured on the mural.  They’re going to paint over her because she’s not pro-business enough.

Juanita also suspect that this Friday, the Republicans will attempt to erase all memory of the 100th anniversary of the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire because it depicts  sweatshops in such an unflattering light.

(Thanks to Deb for the heads-up on this one!)

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This is why Juanita places her faith in God.  She is not smart enough to think up something this darned entertaining on her own.

Rob Johnson, who managed Gov. Rick Perry’s 2010 re-election campaign, has signed on with Newt Gingrich as Gingrich explores whether to run for president.

Johnson is the senior adviser in the Perry’s office right now.  You know, the one advising Perry to do diddle squat while the state is falling apart.

“Think of it,” Juanita dreams, “all the gravitas of Newt and all the brains of Perry.  A Frankenstein who wears fringe and mates with anything standing still.”

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James O’Keefe is panhandling.

“It sure beats the hell outta working,” Juanita says.

O’Keefe is sending out emails begging dollars, whining over his $50,000 credit card debt which he incurred in his quest to save America, not for any personal gain or attention at all.

Plus, even though James doesn’t mention it, all that video editing equipment is damn expensive.

And he claims that he’s getting death threats.  Which he, of course has not reported to the police because the police … well, they are in cahoots with NPR and ACORN.  Or something.

By the way, thank goodness, contributions are not tax deductible.

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Texas Republican United States Congressman Blake Farenthold has a lot of thing the ladies want, if you know what I mean.

Police are investigating a suspected burglary at U.S. Rep. Blake Farenthold’s district office that instead may have been a cleaning crew oversight.

And later in the story —

No matter the outcome of the investigation, Farenthold’s Chief of Staff David Lasseter said staff are following through with plans to install security cameras and an alarm system at the district office.

Woo, woo, I betcha those cameras might catch more of United States Representative Blake Farenthold’s Duckiepalooza parties.

Yeah, Hon, that’s Blake in the jammies.  With a minor.

“He says he was at a charity fundraiser,” Juanita explains.  “I do not even want to know what he wears to political fundraisers.  Don’t tell me.  I’m serious about that.  I do not gag stylishly.”

Folks this is what happens when there’s a Republican sweep.  Do not let it happen ever again.