Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’

And Speaking of Having Your Brain Eaten

July 11, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

There must be an outbreak of zombies.

Rick Miller and, yes, all the Republicans here own the same cheap shirt

First, we have a guy right here in Fort Bend County who is running for the State House by the name of Rick Miller.  He’s a thug.  Seriously, he’s a dead solid thug who stood by and watched while a 70 year old woman get beat up.  Anyway, he got endorsed by Phyllis Schlafly, which tells you how low his opinion of women is.

He announced that he was also being endorsed by Tom DeLay.  Now you would think that the endorsement of a convicted felon would not be something to crow about, unless, of course, you’re delusional.  Rick Miller is delusional.

And then there’s Mitt Romney.  He’s going to London for the Olympics and do a little fundraising while there. With bankers.  Because he doesn’t have enough problems being linked to rich, out of touch bankers, ya know.

The events involve a reception – at a cost of $2,500 per person – and a high-dollar “private dinner with Governor Mitt Romney” that will cost from $25,000 to $75,000 per person. Both events will be held at a location in “central London” that has not yet been named.

Though former Barclays CEO Bob Diamond, who recently resigned over the rate-fixing scandal, is no longer among the hosts, a registered lobbyist from Barclays, Patrick Durkin, is still one of the hosts.

Yeah, it’s just such a mess when your host is headed to freekin’ prison for ripping off people.  Makes for awkward introductions.

Does anybody remember when President Obama gave a speech in Germany after he was elected and the rightwing started yelling Globalization! with the music from Jaws in the background?

Well, the cat’s got their tongue now.

Personally, I think Mitt is selling the original 13 colonies back to England.  They vote way too Democratic.

Thanks to Carl for the heads-up.

Well, This Explains a Lot

July 11, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Rick Perry wasted a bullet on a coyote and missed the deer that’s now eating his brain.

Brain-eating disease found in Texas deer

I know, I know – cheap shot.

God Bless America

July 11, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

There’s some good news coming from House Republicans:  children in America no longer have to fret about dying due to lack of health care.  We’re going to starve them to death.  No need for health care then, eh?

Last month, the Senate slashed the  Supplemental Assistance Nutrition Program by $4.5 billion, and now the House increased that by $12 billion more.  If you are a working family of three and you have an annual income of more than $24,100 annually, you’re rolling in the dough and don’t need no damn food.

Plus …

According to the Congressional Budget Office (CBO), 280,000 children in low-income families whose eligibility for free school meals is tied to their receipt of SNAP would lose free meals when their families lost SNAP benefits.

According to Matthew, when  Sweet Jesus comes again, his first question to us will be “Did you feed the hungry?”

That’s the first damn question.  Not, did you have a prayer meeting in a football stadium?  Did you wave a flag around?  Did you hide your money in Swiss bank accounts?

Ya know what?  If we want God to bless America, then maybe America should start blessing God.

Oh Lord, I hope the second question isn’t, “did you just hate Republicans for being total jerks?” because if it is, I’m going to hell, too.

Thanks to Norma for the heads up.

The Cock. The Bull. The Story.

July 10, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Please do not attempt to confuse Texas Governor Rick Perry with facts.  It makes him babble.

In explaining his nope-vote on expanding Medicaid  to his drooling base of voters, Perry said …

“The bottom line here is that Medicaid is a failed program,” Perry said in an appearance on Fox News. “To expand this program is not unlike adding a thousand people to the Titanic.”

Well, it may not be unlike it, but it’s also not like it either.  Hell, at least women and children escaped the Titanic.  Under Perry’s no-plan health care program, everybody dies.  He does understand that expanding Medicaid is putting more lifeboats on the Texas Titanic, right?

I guess not.

Get this painful attempt at neuron synapse.

When asked how he’d improve health care in a state where one in four people are uninsured, Perry bristled. “People come from all over the globe to the state of Texas for their health care,” he said.

Dammit.  Dammit.  Dammit. Don’t you just want to get up in his face and holler, “People with endless supplies of MONEY, you damn fool!”

One in four Texans is walking on a health care tightrope over Niagara Falls, but some dude in New Hampshire with great insurance can come here and buy a whole damn truckload of health.   And, some potentate in Saudi Arabia can bring a tanker of oil with him and get treated.  But, if you’re one in four Texans, you are totally screwed.

Rick Perry is probably not brain dead, but I am certain he can’t get insurance on his brain because it has a pre-exisiting condition called Barely Operational.

Thanks to Steve and Star for the heads-up.

Coincidence? I Think Not.

July 10, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Interesting numbers:

I would be willing to bet that the 13 cases of voter fraud were all done by the same people who saw UFO’s and got hit by lightning.

Thanks to Hilary on Facebook for the heads-up.

Oh Dear God, Not The Flag. Please, Not the Flag.

July 10, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

.

Dear God Almighty,

Rick Perry is waving an American flag at you while wearing his hunting clothes.  Please ignore him.  He is not representative of the human race and we really don’t deserve another flood because of one guy completely full of himself.

Sincerely yours,
Your friend Juanita Jean

Click the little one to see the big one if you’re not afraid of lightning strikes.