Or maybe just the right amount.

He is now saying that gun control leads to having sex with animals on a slippery slope.

Thanks to everybody for the gross heads up.

Guys, I’m up to my neck in alligators right now but I just have to say this —

What the hell kind of world do we live in when we can bring terrorists to this country and give them a safe, fair trial, but a federal prosecutor feels the need to withdraw from a case with the Aryan Brotherhood?

Assistant U.S. Attorney Jay Hileman, who has withdrawn from a large federal racketeering case against alleged members of the Aryan Brotherhood of Texas prison gang, cited “security reasons” in an email he sent Monday to defense attorneys involved in the case, according to one lawyer who received the email.

“He sent the email to every lawyer representing a defendant in the Aryan Brotherhood federal case, and he said — very short email — that he was withdrawing for security reasons,” Houston attorney Katherine Scardino told TPM on Tuesday.

What the hell is going on?

More tomorrow.  I am sure of that.

Thanks to Aggieland Liz for the heads up.

Ted “Carnival” Cruz (adrift, lost, and full of crap) fancies himself the President of these here United Damn States of America, partner, and if you got a problem with that then you’re a damn communist.

He’s been in Washington only three months, but U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas is already planning a pilgrimage to a critical presidential primary state. The outspoken Cruz, a conservative attorney who has sprinted headlong into the Washington media spotlight since his election last November, will be the keynote speaker at the South Carolina Republican Party’s Silver Elephant Dinner, CNN has learned.

So he’s going to South Carolina to test the waters.  That is so damn exciting that I have to put rocks in my shoes to keep from flying.

He doesn’t have to run.  He just has to act like he’s running.  Can you even imagine a hair pulling match between Cruz and Rick Perry over who gets to be the next President from Texas?

I’m trying to get the popcorn concession!  Cruz makes Michele Bachmann look level headed.

This is the most promising development since Rand Paul got a hairpiece and tested the waters himself.

Well, yesterday we heard some either drug or ignorance induced chatter from the Chair of the Georgia Republican Party about gay people.

Today Georgia weighs in on guns.

The Nelson, Georgia city council has met and come up with this —

The Nelson City Council voted 5-0 Monday night to require every household to have a gun and ammunition, unless the residents of the household opt out.

But the new ordinance includes a lot of exemptions, including people with a physical or mental disability, convicted felons and people who conscientiously oppose gun ownership.

I think the key word here is conscientiously.

And I have one question:  who is going to come into my house to check to see that I have the required weapon and ammo?  A government agent?  Joe Bob the crazy city councilman?

In other news, the Nelson City Council reports the theft of their thinking hats.

Thanks to Lindy for the heads up.

Republican Congressvarmint Lou Barletta of Pennsylvania didn’t get the memo from headquarters  that Republicans should tone it down about Hispanics.

Not content to let Alaska congressfool Don Young stand alone in stark bigotry, Barletta weighed in on immigration.

“Why are we even talking about a pathway to citizenship when our borders aren’t even close to being secure?” Barletta told The New York Times during a discussion on possible outcomes of the immigration reform debate currently taking place in Washington.

“Let’s not take on any more water on this sinking ship,” he said. “Let’s patch the holes. Then we’ll decide what do we do with all this water that’s here.”

Cheeezzzz … that made “wetback” seem positively moderate.

With every study saying that a path to citizenship would spur economic development, Barletta stands in a pile of manure complaining about the rain.

Thanks to EMoon for the heads up.

Okay, I wrote five stories today about crazy crap happening in our country, but the best one didn’t happen until tonight.

Pat Robertson announced today that God does not waste miracles on educated people.

A caller to Robertson’s teevee show asked how come miracles only happen in Africa, not here in the god-fearing and deserving US of A?

“People overseas didn’t go to Ivy League schools,” the TV preacher laughed. “We’re so sophisticated, we think we’ve got everything figured out. We know about evolution, we know about Darwin, we know about all these things that says God isn’t real.”

We have been inundated with skepticism and secularism,” he conintued. “And overseas, they’re simple, humble. You tell ‘em God loves ‘em and they say, ‘Okay, he loves me.’ You say God will do miracles and they say, ‘Okay, we believe him.’”

And that’s what God’s looking for. That’s why they have miracles

And that, my friends, explains the Republican education plan.

Thanks to MaryLou for the heads up
.